My position is that each person has the dignity to decide when to offer up their body to his / her spouse. People who don’t respect another person’s dignity, for whatever reason, are reducing that person to the level of an object.
Also, you might want to consolidate your questions. Machine gun questioning can be misinterpreted as an attack, like using ALL CAPS can be interpreted as shouting.
I am unlikely to keep posting on this thread.
I am totally okay with you that each spouse has to respect the human dignity of the other. Thus, in the couple, the sexual war, the sexual force, the conjugal rape (so horrible, awful, so wrong, very evil and a mortal sin) are not natural, are not catholic, are illicit and sinful. Radical feminism and masculinism are so wrong and very dangerous.
The woman is or should be the " New Eve of her Man " and the " Saint Mary Magdalene of her husband ", I mean:
The Female, the Fiancée, the Bride, the Sweetheart, the Love, the Mistress, the Lover, the Beloved, the Muse, the Princess, the Queen, the Friend, the Best-friend, the Girlfriend, the Helper, the Soul-Mate, the Companion, the Partner, the Associate, the Wife and the Potential Mother, the Educator, the Teacher, the Professor, the Thinker, the Philosopher, the Schoolgirl, the Pupil, the Student, the Follower, the Female Opposite Number, the Alterity, the Complementarity, the Person who reveals in him, his part of feminity and helps his masculinity, the Doctress, the Nurse, the Guide of her Husband.
Woman has to assume her feminity; she has to want to be a female; Husband has to receive the feminity of his wife; Husband has to give his masculinity to his wife. In the marriage, female has to understand the normal sexuality of her male
The man is or should be the " New Adam of his wife" and the " Holy Beloved of his wife" , I mean:
The Male, the Fiancé, the Bridegroom, the Sweetheart, the Love, the Lover, the Beloved, the Prince, the King, the Companion, the Friend, the Best friend, the Boy-friend, the Helper, the Soul-Mate, the Companion, the Partner, the Associate, the Husband and the potential Father, the Educator, the Teacher, the Professor, the Thinker, the Philosopher, the Master, the Mentor, the Follower, the Thinker, the Philosopher, the Schoolboy, the Pupil, the Student, the Male Opposite Number, the Alterity, the Complementarity, The Person who reveals in her, her part of masculinity and helps her feminity, the Doctor, the Nurse, the Guide of his Wife.
Man has to assume his virility (masculinity), he has to want to be a male; Woman has to receive the virility of her husband; Wife has to give her feminity to her husband. In the marriage, male has to understand the normal sexuality of his female.
It is a reciprocal duty:
In the marital act, wife is teacher, professor, doctor and master and lover for her husband.
In the marital act, husband is teacher, professor, doctor and master and lover for his wife.
In the marital act, wife is also schoolgirl, pupil, student and follower of her husband.
In the marital act, husband is schoolboy, pupil, student and follower of his wife.
The notion of " conjugal debt " is existing for solving the issues, that is the ultimate mechanism of the conjugal moral. The practice of marital act, that is a right, an obligation and a duty, has to take in consideration:
Liberty of each spouse with the corollaries: The will, the desire, the conscience, the vows the day of wedding, equal dignity;
Health of each spouse, life of each spouse;
Health of each member of the family;
Health of child during the pregnancy of his mother, life of child during the pregnancy of his mother;
Unitive aspect with the two dimensions ( the physical/physiological with the corollaries coming from the body and the psychological/mental/intellectual with the corollaries coming from soul);
Potential fecundity (procreative aspect);
The financial situation of family;
The circunstances of the marital request for union of bodies (when, where, why, what for);
By exeption, the marital act has not to be practiced under very special conditions coming from the exterior context ( for health of one spouse, for adultery of one spouse, and for irresponsibility of one spouse, these are reasonable reasons);
The medical reasons (physical, physiological, psychological, mental), the financial reasons, the affective reasons; the sentimental reasons are valid and licit for refusing the marital act.
. I know I have a lot to work on. I am being referred to a Catholic psychotherapist and will be speaking with my priest this week. Thank God! I need some relief.