Therapy given as Penance

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Peccata

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I went to Confession last Saturday and the priest told me that for my penance I had to begin therapy within 2 weeks. Based on being bipolar and drinking too much, it was reasonable and justified. After considering my confession this week, I think I was rationalizing some of my sins rather than taking responsibility fully. (On the other hand, this disease does affect behavior sometimes. I am on meds and see my psychiatrist regularly.) I tried to tell him that I recently lost my medical insurance. My meds alone are over $500 a month. He repeated this penance in an angry tone. I am unable to work and am waiting (hopefully) for disability to kick in. I do have some savings that I am using to live on for now. Am I duty bound under pain of mortal sin to use my savings for this? I wanted to go yesterday to confession again to talk to him about this but frankly I chickened out. I only have one week left to sort this out. If I don’t get therapy by next Saturday, do I have to stop receiving communion? I truly do not know what to do. Any help would be appreciated.
 
Regarding your penance – you should strive to fulfill it to the best of your ability. However, you should not deprive yourself of necessities (food, clothing, shelter) in order to seek it, especially if you’re without an income at the moment. The priest you went to may not have understood the entirety of your situation, and perhaps though you were trying to make up excuses or something. Hopefully he will be more charitable next time.

Have you spoken to your doctor about programs that offer a discount on bipolar medication? My husband is bipolar (and recently lost his insurance) and is applying for assistance through such a program.

You should call your local county social services program and see if you are eligible for Medicaid coverage, food stamps, or other programs for those in need.

Also, I know our local Catholic Charities offers counseling on a sliding fee scale. Idealy, since you have a bipolar diagnosis you should see a psychiatrist, but without insurance that could be spendy. Still, therapy might be beneficial (to help you learn strategies to control your drinking, for example).

Good luck to you.
 
wanner47 said:
Regarding your penance – you should strive to fulfill it to the best of your ability. However, you should not deprive yourself of necessities (food, clothing, shelter) in order to seek it, especially if you’re without an income at the moment. The priest you went to may not have understood the entirety of your situation, and perhaps though you were trying to make up excuses or something. Hopefully he will be more charitable next time.

Have you spoken to your doctor about programs that offer a discount on bipolar medication? My husband is bipolar (and recently lost his insurance) and is applying for assistance through such a program.

You should call your local county social services program and see if you are eligible for Medicaid coverage, food stamps, or other programs for those in need.

Also, I know our local Catholic Charities offers counseling on a sliding fee scale. Idealy, since you have a bipolar diagnosis you should see a psychiatrist, but without insurance that could be spendy. Still, therapy might be beneficial (to help you learn strategies to control your drinking, for example).

Good luck to you.
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My doctor told me to go to each pharmaceutical company for each med. I am in the process but so far, since I worked for @ 4 months in 2007, my income disqualifies me. For right now I am paying cash for my MD and my meds. I am eligible for Medicare next June. I am wondering if going to AA would qualify as therapy. I worked the twelve steps years ago in Alanon, and I think it would help me. Do I have to go back to that priest and ask him if that is OK?
 
AA definitely counts as therapy, at least in my opinion (for what that’s worth).

If your priest had specific therapy in mind, he would have mentioned so during the confession.

God bless you on your journey. I know it’s a rough road, but I’m sure with the guidance of Christ you will perservere. 🙂
 
I have a problem with this. If you have a real illness, and being bi-polar and alcoholism is an illness, a disease, then that seriously affects your confession and your penance. While some of your acts may be subjectivly sinful, you may not be morally culpable for some of your sins. I think to give you a penance to go to therapy is excessive, especially since you cannot afford it. A penance is supposed to be do-able. In your situation it seems it is not at this time. This is not to say that you cannot look to other avenues for help, such as AA, but bi-polar disorder is probably making your alcoholism worse. You cannot successfully treat one without the other. I think the penance is excessive in this regard. I would seek out another priest as this one doesn’t seem to understand the nature of your disease or your financial situation that makes going for therapy difficult.

Perhaps he should help you to find a way for you to get therapy without paying or for minimal cost through Catholic Charities if he insists you go for therapy as a penance.
 
Joannm said:
I have a problem with this. If you have a real illness, and being bi-polar and alcoholism is an illness, a disease, then that seriously affects your confession and your penance. While some of your acts may be subjectivly sinful, you may not be morally culpable for some of your sins. I think to give you a penance to go to therapy is excessive, especially since you cannot afford it. A penance is supposed to be do-able. In your situation it seems it is not at this time. This is not to say that you cannot look to other avenues for help, such as AA, but bi-polar disorder is probably making your alcoholism worse. You cannot successfully treat one without the other. I think the penance is excessive in this regard. I would seek out another priest as this one doesn’t seem to understand the nature of your disease or your financial situation that makes going for therapy difficult.

Perhaps he should help you to find a way for you to get therapy without paying or for minimal cost through Catholic Charities if he insists you go for therapy as a penance.
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I felt that to seek out another priest would be “priest shopping” which to me would be wrong. Kind of like…well I don’t like your penance so I’ll try another priest.
 
You are not required to do the penance assigned by your confessor. You are still forgiven. You can substitute another penance, such as prayer, self-denial, or works of mercy. You should follow your psychiatrist’s advice about therapy and related questions.
 
Peccata said:
I felt that to seek out another priest would be “priest shopping” which to me would be wrong. Kind of like…well I don’t like your penance so I’ll try another priest.
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Depends on the motivation for “priest shopping”. I think explaining your situation to a different priest would be the height of wisdom.
 
Peccata said:
I felt that to seek out another priest would be “priest shopping” which to me would be wrong. Kind of like…well I don’t like your penance so I’ll try another priest.
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It is my understanding that one may object to a penance and ask for another. It is probably best to do it at the time the penance is assigned, but, that being no longer possible, you are free to ask the next priest you confess to.
 
I’d say AA counts, and there are probably other (hopefully free or cheap) support groups for both alcoholics AND people suffering from bipolar. All would count as therapy, in my humble opinion.

Look for any that may be in your local area.
 
Interesting thread.

A couple of thoughts, going off some of the previous posts:
  1. Remember that you do not earn your forgiveness by doing the penance.
  2. Methinks this is an inappropriate penance. As mentioned earlier bipolar disease is a disease, and it’s not by entirely by choice that you have this condition or have done some things that were the result of this condition. Not that you’re trying to excuse your way out of it by saying, “my bipolar condition made me do it”, but nonetheless bipolar disease can affect behavior.
Perhaps it should have been a suggestion rather than part of the penance.
  1. Nonetheless, you should and are trying to fulfill your penance. If you cannot, and the priest insists that you must even though (for apparent financial reasons) you cannot, methinks it’s appropriate to seek another confessor.
  2. Continue to seek resources that can help you; you need to be both mentally and spiritually healthy.
God bless you.
 
While AA is an excellent support group and has helped many to overcome addiction, it is not the same as therapy. Many therapists suggest AA to their patients to augment the counseling sessions.
 
Joannm said:
While AA is an excellent support group and has helped many to overcome addiction, it is not the same as therapy. Many therapists suggest AA to their patients to augment the counseling sessions.
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Therapy by its dictionary definition simply means treatment of a disease. Certainly AA or similar support groups should routinely be part of the treatment of the diseases of alcoholism and bipolar.

Unless the priest is a doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist he probably wasn’t thinking of the more specific definition that the healthcare profession may use.

In any event no priest has a right to impose a penance on anyone which is beyond their financial means.
 
I just read #1460 in the Catechism and it states the “penance the confessor imposes must take in to account the penitent’s personal situation.” This priest did not do that when I told him that I do not have insurance. I just added up my meds and they will be $862 per month. I think it will be more important for me to be on my meds than therapy right now.

I just need to stop beating myself up over this and try to trust God that all of this will work out. I am old enough to remember the days when we knelt down for a priest’s blessing and kissed his ring. It really never occurred to me that this kind of situation could ever come up.

I hope I am on the right track…:idea:
 
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