"things" we love

[Kathrin]

What do you think about doing versus giving up things you love? I am not talking about material things, but things like: A path you want to take in life, a place you want to move to, stuff like that.

I often feel very strongly about things like that and I get totally “into” it.

I also have OCD/scrupulosity and then I tell myself maybe it is bad if I love something so much and I have to give it up.

But on the other hand maybe God gives me these strong feelings because it is the path I am SUPPOSED to take.

How do I know?

What would you personally say - be thankful if you feel so strongly about something and try to go that path?
Or be very suspicious because you feel so strongly about it and try to banish it from your thoughts? (I am not even sure how possible that is? Well, with God everything is possible. But would God want me to do that?)

I struggle so much with this sometimes. Then sometimes not. Right now I am still totally into learning another language because I feel drawn to a place. I enjoy it so much. Is that all right???

Or does the fact that I am even SCRAED that I MIGHT have to “give it up” mean that I have to, because it is too important to me?

OR is my feeling drawn to do it and enjoying it so much rather a sign that I should be doing it??? And it is my OCD/scrupulosity telling me it may be wrong?

Any ideas?

Kathrin

 

[Nick9]

As long as it is not sinful, why not do what you enjoy doing? God usually draws us by attraction. As the much-quoted phrase from St Augustine goes: love God and then do what you want. Are there ways in which God might be calling you to serve Him in the things you enjoy?

It sounds to me as though your fretting is a symptom of your scrupulosity/OCD. I often wish I knew what I wanted to do simply because then I might know God’s will for me. It has often been a question asked of me by my spiritual directors: what do YOU want to do. God bless you

 

[Kathrin]

Thank you Nick, sometimes an empathetic reply like yours almost brings tears to my eyes.
And it has been the case in the past that looking back, I felt very much that something I was really “into” or attracted to, led me on the right way. Like it was a push I needed…

A friend of mine said today the only decision you have to make it if you want to go to Heaven or Hell, and God will take it from there… I guess he meant if I decide I want to go to heaven and do what is good, I can trust God that He will lead me on the right way?

I so often go back and forth between great happiness and great feelings of guilt/scruples. When I am in scruple-mode I can get very very scared that what I do might be wrong.
And then again I feel so blessed, so very happy… if that is GOOD (to feel happy like that) I want to hold on to that feeling…

And we do need to be happy in order to make others happy too right?

 

[BarbaraTherese]

A friend of mine said today the only decision you have to make it if you want to go to Heaven or Hell, and God will take it from there… I guess he meant if I decide I want to go to heaven and do what is good, I can trust God that He will lead me on the right way?

… …

 

[Trishie]

Kathrin, be at peace. And all the Holy Spirit to inspire and guide you!

Jesus enjoyed wedding feasts visits with friends, and the company of his followers. He showed normal emotions, frustration at others’ unbelief and blindnss to truth, tears when His friend died, joy over little ones, and so on. It’s okay to be human. Jesus lived an ordinary human life for thirty years…which tells us powerfully that our human lives and feelings are valuable, not to be crushed.

Scripture tells us, “value yourself at your proper worth. Who can justify a man who runs himself down, or respect a man who despises himself.” [Ecclesiasticus 10:28-29] If we do fail to love ourselves correctly, we cannot accept God’s love. Let us never imagine ourselves hidden from Your mercy: ‘“Can anyone hide in a dark corner without my seeing him?’ asks the Lord.” [Jeremiah 23-24]

The concept of rightly loving oneself in order to love others as God’s precious children may be confused with the selfishness that ruins unselfish self-love. It requires us to reject negative self-talk and responses. “If a man is mean to himself, to whom will he be good?” [Ecclesiasticus 14:3].

Growth in Christian self-love is facilitated by “filling your mind with everything that is true, everything that is noble, and everything that is pure and good” [Philippians 4:8] and serving “in works of love.” It is allowing the Spirit to direct your life and then “you will be in no danger of yielding to self-indulgence. What the Spirit brings is…love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, trustfulness, gentleness and self-control.” [Galatians 5:13, 16, 26, 22-23]

Love, Trishie

 

[Nick9]

Thank you Nick, sometimes an empathetic reply like yours almost brings tears to my eyes.
And it has been the case in the past that looking back, I felt very much that something I was really “into” or attracted to, led me on the right way. Like it was a push I needed…

thanks for that. It confirms what my directors have been saying to me for so long.

A friend of mine said today the only decision you have to make it if you want to go to Heaven or Hell, and God will take it from there… I guess he meant if I decide I want to go to heaven and do what is good, I can trust God that He will lead me on the right way?

You can definitely trust God to lead you to heaven if that is what you want. Trust is the key. One danger with scrupulosity which you must avoid like the plague is despair. Never despair of God’s mercy and of His love for you.

I so often go back and forth between great happiness and great feelings of guilt/scruples. When I am in scruple-mode I can get very very scared that what I do might be wrong.

one positive point about scruples is that it shows your great love of God, shown by your desire to do His will. This was a point made in Fr Santa’s book, Understanding Scrupulosity (p.236). Here is his website if you haven’t already seen it:

mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity.htm

And then again I feel so blessed, so very happy… if that is GOOD (to feel happy like that) I want to hold on to that feeling…

You ***are ***very blessed. I suggest you spend some time every so often praising God for the happiness He has given you. This seems to be the proper response in your situation. In that way, you make a return to God for the gift He has given you.

And we do need to be happy in order to make others happy too right?

yes, happiness can be contagious!

 

[Kathrin]

Oh I do praise God and thank him, I have written poems of thankfulness.
I have been through hard times (like we all,right?) but I am somebody who counts her blessings. And no, I don’t think could despair because I have a lot of faith. It is only feelins of guilt and fear that nag at me sometimes, and make me second-guess myself…

And trishie thank you so much for this:

"What the Spirit brings is…love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, trustfulness, gentleness and self-control.” [Galatians 5:13, 16, 26, 22-23] "



Kathrin

 

[Nick9]

Oh I do praise God and thank him, I have written poems of thankfulness.
I have been through hard times (like we all,right?) but I am somebody who counts her blessings. And no, I don’t think could despair because I have a lot of faith. It is only feelins of guilt and fear that nag at me sometimes, and make me second-guess myself…

You sound like a very holy person. I am sure God is very happy with you. It sounds like the Devil may be having a go, trying to make you doubt the love and goodness that God has for you. I too suffer many accusatory thoughts. In one recent incident I discussed them with God and said that I was prepared to accept my guilt and repent. I then went through the accusations in detail and it was revealed to me that I had in fact done nothing wrong. I was left feeling very peaceful after this