Thinking about family vacations

[leonie]

I grew up with no family vacations. My dh grew up with yearly ones. We’ve gone the day trip route, mostly because of money.

But, one thing I’ve noticed about my childhood family is, we’ve grown up to be distant (despite living close geographically). Plus, none of my sibs are practicing Catholics. I have one sister and brother who are not handling life well. And, another brother that appears successful, but has rejected having children so he and his wife can pursue hobbies.

My dh on the other hand has two living siblings who are thriving-- good Christians active in their Protestant churches, with strong marriages and happy children.

We had really similar upbringings, except my family attended Mass every Sunday and his Methodist family barely went. My parents are a little more consistent and even keeled, while his parents are more dramatic and difficult.

But, one difference I see is that they always ate dinner together and took yearly vacations. I think that this may be the key.

What do you think?

We’ve always thought of family vacations as a luxury, but lately I’m thinking more that they are more important than that.

Opinions?

Also, what’s the cheapest family vacation you’ve ever taken? Was it fun?

 

[Tietjen]

I grew up with no family vacations. My dh grew up with yearly ones. We’ve gone the day trip route, mostly because of money.

But, one thing I’ve noticed about my childhood family is, we’ve grown up to be distant (despite living close geographically). Plus, none of my sibs are practicing Catholics. I have one sister and brother who are not handling life well. And, another brother that appears successful, but has rejected having children so he and his wife can pursue hobbies.

My dh on the other hand has two living siblings who are thriving-- good Christians active in their Protestant churches, with strong marriages and happy children.

We had really similar upbringings, except my family attended Mass every Sunday and his Methodist family barely went. My parents are a little more consistent and even keeled, while his parents are more dramatic and difficult.

But, one difference I see is that they always ate dinner together and took yearly vacations. I think that this may be the key.

What do you think?

We’ve always thought of family vacations as a luxury, but lately I’m thinking more that they are more important than that.

Opinions?

Also, what’s the cheapest family vacation you’ve ever taken? Was it fun?

I voted that family vacations are important. However, I believe that any and everything done WITH the family is the actual key and not specifically vacations. Eating dinner together, family game nights, family movie nights, going to a ballgame together or to the beach or picnic together all play an important role in strengthening the bonds not only between parents and the children but also between siblings.

 

[Just_wondering]

Hmm… my family had both family vacations and dinner together every night, and I’d definitely attribute our “togetherness” to the dinners rather than the vacations. I have many more fond memories of family dinners than vacations (except for the many verses of dirty folk songs my brother and I composed in the back of the pickup on one vacation ). Even now, although we still travel together occasionally, it’s the food that really brings us together.

On the other hand, while I feel quite close to my family emotionally, and I love them and respect them, my siblings and I don’t actually talk all that often, and we all live in different provinces or countries.

 

[Lil_M]

I voted “not very important”. Being the youngest I know my family did take a couple trips before I was born and when I was very young but I think it was mainly camping. Having 6 kids on a farm isn’t conducive to a lifestyle where trips are possible time-wise or financially.Plus with a 15 year age span there were not many years when we were all at home or would have similar interests. Once or twice a summer we would go to the beach (and my dad would say, we have 50 acres of hot sand at home ) but we never like, all got a plane and went to Florida. Looking back I can imagine how stressful doing a trip would have been even if finances permitted. We are pretty close so I don’t think not taking trips really made a difference. When I think of my DH and I and our child(ren) I think mostly of taking trips to see family and camping Travel can be a great learning and leisure opportunity but not a necessity for family bonding.

 

[abort73catholic]

Hmm… my family had both family vacations and dinner together every night, and I’d definitely attribute our “togetherness” to the dinners rather than the vacations. I have many more fond memories of family dinners than vacations (except for the many verses of dirty folk songs my brother and I composed in the back of the pickup on one vacation ). Even now, although we still travel together occasionally, it’s the food that really brings us together.

On the other hand, while I feel quite close to my family emotionally, and I love them and respect them, my siblings and I don’t actually talk all that often, and we all live in different provinces or countries.

Agreed.

And maybe my opinion isn’t as great since I’m still in high school, but I find it very important to spend time with kids/siblings at times throughout the year, rather than just a family vacation.

Don’t get me wrong…we have yearly vacations, and I love them because of the time we spend with each other (and I love to travel!). I have been blessed to get the chance to travel from Arizona to Washington D.C.

I would encourage vacations if you are able, though. In the meantime, sit with them at dinner.

 

[Thais]

My husband and I have the exact same scenario, but the other way around.

I did vote that it is very important, because in our case I know for sure it really was. My mom and dad both always worked, a lot, and although we did have the main meal (lunch, in Brazil) together when we were kids, that changed when we started getting into high school, schedules just weren’t the same. We (the kids) had too many classes and too much to do (other activities).

The only thing that hasn’t changed (still hasn’t changed for my sisters, even though the older one is married with 2 kids) is… the traditional family vacation. It has changed for me because I live in the US now. In fact they are all going on a cruise in Brazil next week (this time it really got a little crazy, because my aunts, cousins, etc are also going, 25 adults and 5 children to be exact), and I really wish my husband and I had the money to go, oh well, not yet.

Even if we were really busy and didn’t really talk with each other about subjects other than schedule, school, grades or work for an entire year, or had disagreements, etc, everything changed at the beach. They weren’t stressed out about work, and we didn’t allow them to even talk about it (they worked together up until when my mom retired), we actually had fun together and got to know each other better.

Even my marriage has a little bit to do with that. In my first year having a full-year work vacation after college, it was time to send out the form, I called my dad and asked where we were going that year, he laughed and said “your mom and I are going to the beach, I don’t know about you girls”. My older sister was pregnant with her first baby, and my parents wouldn’t pay for my younger sister to go on an excursion group or whatever with me. I sent my husband (we were only friends at the time) an email saying I could come and visit him, well, there you go, it’s a long story.

But anyways, we are all very close in my family. My husband’s family, even though his mom was always home, isn’t nearly as close. At first I thought it might be an American vs. Brazilian difference, but it’s not, as I’ve come to see other American families just like mine.

 

[tundramom]

I voted important! We always take a vacation because if we didn’t my husband would get phone calls that he can’t deny. He would spend half the time on the phone if we just stayed home.

So, we camp. We have a pop-up and we get in the mini-van and set up camp each night where ever we end up… Last year was Yellowstone, and that was awesome, but that wasn’t really the destination. The destination was camping… anywhere!

BTW, if you’re in Gilette (sp?) Wyoming, stay at the “crazy woman campground”. LOL It’s not really that great, but it’s awesome to have your picture taken by the sign.

in Christ
Steph

 

[JPUSC]

I grew up with no family vacations. My dh grew up with yearly ones. We’ve gone the day trip route, mostly because of money.

But, one thing I’ve noticed about my childhood family is, we’ve grown up to be distant (despite living close geographically). Plus, none of my sibs are practicing Catholics. I have one sister and brother who are not handling life well. And, another brother that appears successful, but has rejected having children so he and his wife can pursue hobbies.

My dh on the other hand has two living siblings who are thriving-- good Christians active in their Protestant churches, with strong marriages and happy children.

We had really similar upbringings, except my family attended Mass every Sunday and his Methodist family barely went. My parents are a little more consistent and even keeled, while his parents are more dramatic and difficult.

But, one difference I see is that they always ate dinner together and took yearly vacations. I think that this may be the key.

What do you think?

We’ve always thought of family vacations as a luxury, but lately I’m thinking more that they are more important than that.

Opinions?

Also, what’s the cheapest family vacation you’ve ever taken? Was it fun?

Yes, children tend to cherish memories of family vacations. For a large family, I think it would be a good bonding experience.

For college fraternities, it’s often the retreat the actives make the pledges go on at the beginning that forges the ties between the new brothers.

 

[Claymont79]

We only ever did long weekends growing up, that was all they could financially take (the parents said- but it was really all they could take of being together). My brother and I in the back of a Gremlin for 8 plus hours (few pit stops) having to sit perfectly still so as not to poke them in the back was not fun.

So I try to have decent vacations for our bunch. The beach, going to visit extended family, etc…We did a family vacation to Dominican Republic 2 summers ago for my brother’s wedding and it was a blast. We are trying to save for a trip like that to Mexico next - but will try to get to SanDiego or maybe Tahoe (2 kids close by this summer).

We have always eaten together as much a schedules have permitted, growing up it was just what you did for efficiency’s sake. Now I feel it’s the high point of the day.