Thinking of becoming Catholic but conflicted

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To the OP, I’m still wondering what this “passionate worship” is that you spoke of.
 
Thank you for posting. That is kind of what I thought - either you are “all in” or don’t bother. I just don’t have the personality to “go along” despite deep reservations or disagreements. I am just not that kind of person who will live inauthentically just because one of many churches says I should do xyz to get to Heaven. I keep waiting for the “better understanding” to come - but I just flat out think that the Church is wrong on some of this stuff. I can’t get past the paternalistic “father knows best” mentality. If there is zero room for discernment and personal discretion then I am probably just not cut out to be a Catholic.

What if I never “understand that the Church is right?” The truth is that I doubt many people think “The church is right” based on statistics that the vast majority of Catholics happily use contraception. I guess I could just do what I believed was best and go to mass anyway, participating in the ways I felt were positive and beneficial, but I am not the kind of person who does that either./QUOTE

All I can tell you, correct me if I am wrong, You do believe Jesus is our savior right? Then stop being so hard on yourself. Just pray that God will put you wherever he wants you to be. For right now I think that will be a good start.

I hate to say this, but not all Catholic church’s are the same. I go to a very magisterial Catholic Church. 4000 members over 100 ministries and a priest that is so awesome you are hungry for more and you want to go to church. I will pray for you.

In Christ the King,
Jiilian
 
Hi everyone,
Hi JasmineTea 🙂
I am a 26-year-old who was raised nominally Catholic. I did make my sacraments but it was pretty half-hearted and my parents rarely took me to church. They don’t go at all anymore.

In college I looked into various religions and sects of Christianity. I attended a nondenominational church for a couple of years, and there I really grew in my relationship with Christ. I found really outstanding fellowship, passionate worship and that was a really healthy, positive time in my life.
Since college I moved away and lost that group of fellow worshipers and have been thinking, now that I am engaged to another “raised a little bit Catholic nothing” that maybe we need to evaluate where we stand on religion and how we want to raise our family. We have very similar values and goals and both agree that Christianity is what we want to follow - it’s just about finding a church.
Good idea. 👍
Both of us are very skeptical about the Catholic church. I do not want to offend people so if you will be offended by my feelings about the Church then stop reading! Okay if you are still with me here are my concerns…
-I don’t agree that you HAVE to confess to a priest. That seems silly and why would God, who is the be all end all, make it that way? I know there are some loose references in the Bible that support the Catholic concept of confession, but I am not convinced that it is mandatory. I think there is value in confessing a sin to another person for means of accountability, but I don’t think confessing to a priest is the only way God can forgive. Seems ridiculous.
I don’t wish to offend you or anything, however I believe this usually comes from those who have never experienced the enormous power of confession.

I find a lot of people, even Catholics want to agree with you here when they have never been to confession, primarily; because, it’s scary. It’s a hard thing to humble oneself enough to do it and I believe many people struggle with that.

To be honest, I can’t explain to you why confession is so important, I simply know it is because of the powerful grace I felt afterwards. I know it’s true, but unfortunately at this stage this is all I can offer you on this point. However I would like to share with you a quote from the Diary of Saint Faustina regarding confession.

"…when you go to confession, to this fountain of My mercy, the Blood and Water which came forth from My Heart always flows down upon your soul and ennobles it. Every time you go to confession, immerse yourself entirely in My mercy, with great trust, so that I may pour the bounty of My grace upon your soul. When you approach the confessional, know this, that I myself am waiting there for you. I am only hidden by the priest, but I myself act in your soul. Here the misery of the soul meets the God of mercy. Souls draw graces solely with the vessel of trust. If their trust is great, there is no limit to My generosity. The torrents of grace inundate humble souls. The proud remain always in poverty and misery, because My grace turns away from them to humble souls." (Diary, 1603).

And the proud will never be able to confess their sins to “a priest”, let alone “some man who thinks he has special powers” as they might put it etc etc.

I would also strongly recommend the book 7 Secrets of Confession by Vinny Flynn.
-I don’t agree that missing church services is a sin. I think it’s a good idea to be part of a faith community and to participate, but I don’t think that deciding to spend a day hiking in awe of God’s creation is going to send you to Hell. I am turned off by the Catholic church’s insistence that you don’t have a choice over whether or not you attend Mass on a given Sunday. I think that “obligation” should not be part of our relationship with God. That’s not how loved ones treat each other.
Oh, JasmineTea. If only you knew!

I believe Catholics do much harm to souls by focusing on the sin of missing Mass. So many focus on the teaching that it’s a sin. However; why it’s a sin is rarely talked about. I believe rarely is the enormous gift and treasure of the Mass focused on.

If people knew the real value of the Mass, I believe they would be mad not to want to go.

I believe the question should be, do you want to go to Mass? do you hunger/thirst for it?

If you hunger/thirst for the Mass, even if you do miss it, your not sinning, if you don’t hunger/thirst for the Mass, even if you do go, you will simply be paying lip service, “These people honour me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.” (Isaiah 29:13)

I believe if there reason someone goes to Mass is to avoid sinning, than I believe that’s how a heart turns cold and hard.

This is what Jesus said to St. Faustina about the Mass -

"I desire to unite Myself with human souls; My great delight is to unite Myself with souls. Know; My daughter, that when I come to a human heart in Holy Communion, My hands are full of all kinds of graces which I want to give to the soul. But souls do not even pay any attention to Me; they leave Me to Myself and busy themselves with other things. Oh, how sad I am that souls do not recognize Love! They treat Me as a dead object" (Diary, 1385).

I believe not once did Christ talk to St Faustina about the ‘sin of missing mass’ but rather about ‘the great gifts he wants to give us there that we reject’

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I believe if people don’t hunger/thirst for the Mass, if they don’t have that passion, than that is what I believe they need to focus on and most certainly not the sin of missing Mass, because it’s in that way that people attend Mass out of fear, guilt or by feeling forced to go, that’s how you turn a heart cold I believe, it’s how the Mass becomes some routine that lacks all enthusiasm, instead of another unique and loving encounter with our Lord Jesus Christ as it should be. He does not want us to attend out of fear, guilt or force.

If you do not experience that hunger/thirst for the Mass, if you wish to light that passion, that fire inside you, than I would like to ask you to please read the short booklet The Holy Mass.

(The booklets contain the Roman Catholic Imprimatur which assures the reader that nothing therein is contrary to Catholic Faith, Morals or Teachings for more information regarding the messages of Jesus and Mary to Catalina, please read the following - youshallbelieve.com/A-plea-to-humanity.pdf).

The Holy Mass - loveandmercy.org/Eng-HM-Reg.pdf
Jesus to Catalina:
The Passion - loveandmercy.org/Eng-TP-Reg.pdf

**11) For love of souls, I remain a prisoner in the Holy Eucharist, so that in their sorrow and grief they are being consoled by the most tender of Hearts, by the best of Fathers, by the most loyal friend. But that Love, which is consumed for the good of mankind, is not going to be returned.
  1. I live amongst sinners to be their salvation and their life, their doctor and medicine; yet they, in return, in spite of their sick nature, distance themselves from Me. They offend Me and scorn Me.
  2. My children, poor sinners! Do not distance yourselves from Me. I wait for you night and day at the Tabernacle. I will not reproach you for your crimes; I will not throw your sins in your face. What I will do is to wash you with the Blood of My wounds. Do not be afraid; come to Me. You do not know how much I love you.
  3. And you, dear souls, why are you cold and indifferent to My love? I know you have to attend to the needs of your family, your home, and of the world that constantly demands of you. But, can it be that you do not have a moment to come and give Me proof of your love and gratitude? Do not allow yourselves to be carried away by so many useless worries; reserve a moment of your time to visit the Prisoner of Love. If your body is sick, can you not find a few minutes to seek the Doctor who must cure you? Come to He who can restore strength and health of the soul. Give alms of love to this Divine Beggar, who calls you, wants you, and waits for you.**
Jesus to Catalina:
The Holy Mass - loveandmercy.org/Eng-HM-Reg.pdf

When I returned to my seat and started to kneel down, the Lord said: **“Listen…” **And a moment later, I began to hear the prayers of the lady who was seated in front of me and who had just received Communion.

What she was saying without opening her mouth was more or less like this: “Lord, remember that we are at the end of the month and I do not have the money to pay the rent, the car and the children’s school. You have to do something to help me… Please, make my husband stop drinking so much. I can no longer bear his drunken episodes, and my youngest son is going to be held back again this year if you do not help him. He has exams this week. And do not forget that my neighbor must move to another place. Have her do it at once because I cannot stand her any more… etc., etc…”

Then, His Excellency said: “Let us pray,” and obviously all the assembly stood up for the final prayer.

Jesus said in a sad tone: **“Did you notice? Not once did she tell Me that she loved Me. Not once did she give thanks for My gift to her of bringing My Divinity down to her poor humanity to elevate her toward Me. Not a single time did she say: ‘Thank You Lord.’ It has been a litany of requests… and almost all of those who come to receive Me are like that.

“I have died for love and I am risen. For love I await each one of you, and for love I remain with you… But you do not realize that I need your love. Remember that I am the Beggar of Love in this sublime hour for the soul.” **
Jesus to Catalina:
In Adoration - loveandmercy.org/Eng-IA-Reg.pdf

Apart from one day per week when a Holy Bishop goes to celebrate Holy Mass and after Mass he exposes the Most Blessed Sacrament for Adoration, rare are the persons who come in order to accompany the Lord during the day.
  1. With His usual gentleness, He consoled me by telling me that those persons who came there were heard with special attention, since they did so with love, without wishing to be seen by any other persons except Jesus Himself, and that this compensated for the lack of love of those who only attended large Churches when they were filled with people, to get the attention of priests or to take the pulpit and direct the prayers which were recited more for the purpose of being heard by human beings than by God.
  2. He went on to say: “That is how things are nowadays, little daughter. Everyone will tell you that they have no time, but they all have problems. There are so many who wait for “an opportune moment” to concern themselves with the things of God and the needs of their souls, a moment that never comes.
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  • I don’t agree that contraception is wrong. Sorry, I just don’t. I’ve read humane vitae and “The good news about sex and marriage” and it really rings false to me. Very straw-graspy and smells STRONGLY of an “agenda.” I think if a married couple decides that two kids is good for them, then so be it. I agree that abortions are always wrong, but I don’t see how contraception between mature spouses is anything but a tool.
Sorry, I can’t help you much here as I have not done much study on this issue, I don’t believe they have an Agenda and if anything, I believe it is a hard teaching. I believe the teaching on contraception has not been tried and found wanting, but rather, left untried and found difficult. I believe the teaching on contraception is true, but very difficult and I would also make sure to accompany this teaching with the mercy of God.
-I don’t believe in indulgences. I mean, come on. Getting to Heaven is not a game of Monopoly where you can earn “get out of jail free” cards. I am not sure there is any strong biblical proof that God grants “indulgences” anyway. They seem VERY superstitious and very much beneath what God is.
Sorry, I haven’t done much research on this subject either.
–I don’t think there is any proof that the host is changed to the actual body of Christ. I’m not saying I am totally against the idea, I’m just not sure that is for real. Seems very magical and superstitious to me. I am not sure how a grown adult is able to convince him or herself that this is a real thing.
I would strongly recommend the following book -
Unseen by Ron Tesoriero and Lee Han:
http://s15.postimg.org/mzvgbd747/unseen.jpg

Unseen – New Evidence - loveandmercy.org/english-books/

In Buenos Aires in 1999, Pope Francis, then known as Archbishop Jorge Bergoglio, sought a scientific investigation into something very unusual. A Communion Host appeared to have inexplicably changed to what looked like flesh and blood. First published in “Reason to Believe” in 2007, and then presented to Pope Benedict XVI and geneticist Dr. Francis Collins, Director of the Human Genome Project in 2009, the startling scientific evidence inspired Ron Tesoriero, an Australian lawyer and documentary film producer, and co-author Lee Han, to follow where the evidence led. And where it led is remarkable. This new book, “UNSEEN – New Evidence” presents not only a convincing basis for the belief in the Real Presence in the Eucharist but is the most serious scientific challenge yet to contemporary thinking on the origin of life in the universe.
Eucharistic Miracle of Buenos Aires:
A consecrated Host becomes flesh and blood

At seven o’clock in the evening on August 18, 1996, Fr. Alejandro Pezet was saying Holy Mass at a Catholic church in the commercial center of Buenos Aires. As he was finishing distributing Holy Communion, a woman came up to tell him that she had found a discarded host on a candleholder at the back of the church. On going to the spot indicated, Fr. Alejandro saw the defiled Host. Since he was unable to consume it, he placed it in a container of water and put it away in the tabernacle of the chapel of the Blessed Sacrament.

On Monday, August 26, upon opening the tabernacle, he saw to his amazement that the Host had turned into a bloody substance. He informed Cardinal Jorge Bergoglio, who gave instructions that the Host be professionally photographed. The photos were taken on September 6. They clearly show that the Host, which had become a fragment of bloodied flesh, had grown significantly in size. For several years the Host remained in the tabernacle, the whole affair being kept a strict secret. Since the Host suffered no visible decomposition, Cardinal Bergoglio decided to have it scientifically analyzed.

On October 5, 1999, in the presence of the Cardinal’s representatives, Dr. Castanon took a sample of the bloody fragment and sent it to New York for analysis. Since he did not wish to prejudice the study, he purposely did not inform the team of scientists of its provenance. One of these scientists was Dr. Frederic Zugiba, the well-known cardiologist and forensic pathologist. He determined that the analyzed substance was real flesh and blood containing human DNA. Zugiba testified that, “the analyzed material is a fragment of the heart muscle found in the wall of the left ventricle close to the valves. This muscle is responsible for the contraction of the heart. It should be borne in mind that the left cardiac ventricle pumps blood to all parts of the body. The heart muscle is in an inflammatory condition and contains a large number of white blood cells. This indicates that the heart was alive at the time the sample was taken. It is my contention that the heart was alive, since white blood cells die outside a living organism. They require a living organism to sustain them. Thus, their presence indicates that the heart was alive when the sample was taken. What is more, these white blood cells had penetrated the tissue, which further indicates that the heart had been under severe stress, as if the owner had been beaten severely about the chest.”
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"Excerpts from the speech of Dr. Ricardo Castañón:
Now I’ll start a very interesting topic which I’ll surely deeply explain. I was called by the Cardinal of Buenos Aires … because … there is a trend of certain people [receiving] the Communion with their hand. So somebody dropped the [consecrated] Host and since the Host was dirty he didn’t want to pick it up. … The priest grabbed it and put it in a water fountain and let it sit in the water, so that it can dissolve. [The Host was then placed in a container of water and put in the Tabernacle.] After five or six days of being in the Tabernacle, they opened the Tabernacle and noticed that instead of being dissolved it had some red stains in different shapes. They noticed that the stains grew in the following days. That’s when they invited me to take a sample and find out what it was all about.

I travelled several times and got two samples. One [of the samples] is like gelatine. … [The other] has become like a dry scab. I went to some labs in the U.S. in California to take these samples. I don’t tell them that this comes from a Host. Blind tests consist of just giving the samples to the lab tech. … [The lab tech later reported to me:] “Doctor, the sample that you have brought us is muscle from the heart—muscle from the myocardium of the left ventricle.” That was the first result, but there are many things to discover.

We’ve been working on these studies since 1999. [But just recently found a] great expert in cardiology, pathology and biochemistry. He’s the only professor who has written a book of how to determine [the way in which] a person died when the heart has been wounded. So he’s a very famous professor, Dr. Frederick Zugibe. We gave him the samples and he said: “The person that had this heart must have been very wounded because his heart shows that he must have been very beat up. He was tortured!” He didn’t know it was a Host! Then what happened is that he said: “But there is something you need to explain. How is it possible that while I was studying this sample, the sample was moving, it was beating? So you explain to me: How did you take out the heart of a dead man and took it alive to me to my New York lab?” … Imagine telling a person that … a piece of wheat has turned into blood, coagulated and become heart tissue!

But it doesn’t end here since he asked us how was it possible that it is alive. I’ve been studying this sample since 1999—it’s been more than five years that I have the sample. So I went to the lab in Buenos Aires. And I looked for the documents of the first studies realized in Buenos Aires. And the lab tech that had done the first studies wrote: “Some liquids are observed like red blood cells, white blood cells, hemoglobin. What calls my attention is that the cells are moving and beating. Some days had gone by already yet [under normal circumstances] after fifteen minutes the blood cells die!

So I got attracted to the heart topic and I found out that in Lanciano, a town located at the south of Italy, a priest that was celebrating Mass doubted if Jesus was present in the Eucharist. He doubted, and in the moment he was doubting the Host became flesh and blood. If you travel to Lanciano you can see it. … The wine turned into five [blood] clots. There are five blood clots, blood that looks like cotton. But the five of them have different sizes and weigh the same! The bishops’ conference of Italy invited in the ‘70’s—this happened in the eighth century, but they kept it [preserved in a reliquary]—they invited this professor Dr. Linolli, who is an expert in biochemistry and pathology to study it, and this doctor told us it “is muscle from the heart, just like the sample you have.” Hence, the sample I have from the ‘90’s from Buenos Aires is the same as this one—belongs to the same person!

What do you think? … So here we’re talking about what I believe is an extraordinary proof. Can I prove that Jesus Christ is present in the Eucharist? The Lord says something mystical: “I make miracles for the blind and deaf, but I would love not to make any miracles and you would believe because of faith.” I’m no one to say these are proofs, but I just want to put on the table the results of my research so you can meditate and come up with your own conclusions.
The Holy Eucharist, A Matter of Faith, A Matter of Fact - thedivinemercy.org/shrine/story.php?NID=5114

A Great Archive of the Dozens of Eucharistic Miracles - therealpresence.org/eucharst/mir/engl_mir.htm
-I am not sure one religion is the only one that is “true” and that everyone else is “wrong.”
You don’t have to believe that. I don’t. We simply believe that the Catholic Church has the ‘whole’ truth.
Anyway, that’s what I am considering at this point and since my parents are not active I don’t really have anyone else to help me think this through. I want to do the right thing but a lot rings false to me and I really liked how in the nondenominational church it was JUST about getting closer to Christ and having a relationship with Him with all the other baloney stripped away. But, if someone can point out some other ideas I would thoughtfully consider them.

Thank you
I believe you are not all that far from the Catholic Church, I simply believe you are looking at much of Catholic Teaching the wrong way or misunderstanding it.

I hope all this has helped you, sorry about the length.

God Bless

Thank you for reading
Josh
 
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JasmineTea:
-I don’t agree that you HAVE to confess to a priest. That seems silly and why would God, who is the be all end all, make it that way? I know there are some loose references in the Bible that support the Catholic concept of confession, but I am not convinced that it is mandatory. I think there is value in confessing a sin to another person for means of accountability, but I don’t think confessing to a priest is the only way God can forgive. Seems ridiculous.
Also regarding the point about confession, I hope you don’t mind if I share with you a small piece from Pope Francis.
VATICAN CITY (CNS):
Pope Francis says he goes to confession every two weeks - catholicphilly.com/2013/11/think-tank/catholic-spirituality/pope-francis-says-he-goes-to-confession-every-two-weeks/

VATICAN CITY (CNS) — Pope Francis said he goes to confession every two weeks, knowing that God never tires of forgiving those who repent, but also knowing that having a priest say “I absolve you” reinforces belief in God’s mercy.

Using the literal Italian translation of a Spanish saying, “It’s better to turn red once than yellow a thousand times,” Pope Francis said he knows some people are embarrassed to confess their sins to a priest, but it is the best path to spiritual healing and health.

At his weekly general audience in St. Peter’s Square Nov. 20, Pope Francis reflected on the forgiveness of sins as one of the missions Jesus entrusted to his apostles and their successors.

In a world often dominated by “individualism and subjectivism,” he said, many people — including many Catholics — say that God will forgive their sins and they have no need of the sacrament of confession and the ministry of a priest.

“Certainly, God forgives every repentant sinner, but the Christian is bound to Christ and Christ is united to his church,” the pope said. “God, in his sovereign mercy, forgives everyone, but he wanted those who belong to Christ and his church to receive forgiveness through the community’s ministers.”

“Priests, too, need confession, even bishops. We are all sinners. Even the pope goes to confession every two weeks because the pope, too, is a sinner,” he said. “My confessor hears what I say, offers me advice and forgives me. We all need this.”

Through the presence and words of a priest, he said, penitents have “the certainty of forgiveness in the name of the church.”

The church, he said, does not “own” the power to forgive sins, but is its servant and “rejoices every time it can offer this gift.”
God Bless

Thank you for reading
Josh
 
I didn’t read all of the responses, so I might be repeating something…but anyway…

I am currently converting from Protestantism to Catholicism. I understand having doubts, however, I have found that mine have been lessened by attending the RCIA program. I had SO many questions and misunderstandings that were answered through attending classes.

I worry that you are focusing on the “rules” rather than the reason why the rules are in place. You are leaning on your own understanding to say that some things are okay, when the Church would tell you otherwise, and really the Church has much more authority on moral issues than what we learn from today’s society. Do research about the questions you have, talk to other Catholics, and best yet, talk to a Priest.

When I started looking into the faith, there was a big “who are you to tell me what to do” attitude that came out of me, but as I learned just how much the Church knew more than I thought I did about life and faith, I learned that submission to Her authority is only in my best interest. Do I still question things and think for myself? Of course. But I research, read, and learn, and have never found the Church to be wrong in Her teaching.

One thing that I struggled with at first was praying the Rosary. Everyone told me how wonderful the Rosary is and I struggled with it. But, guess what? When I learned more about it and decided to pray, it changed my life!

I hope that you find the truth that you seek. I hope that you research and find out what Catholicism truly teaches and find some people who are willing to walk with you on your journey. Keeping you in my prayers!
 
Hello, JasminTea:

I’m very late to this thread. I bet you never imagined how much discussion your post would inspire here!

I just wanted to add my little thought that it seems you are struggling under a tidal wave of Catholic doctrine. You don’t need to, nor should you, try to understand everything the Church teaches on every “big” issue. God is very patient with His children and gently calls to you - He doesn’t hit you on the head and scream.

Your parents, even if they did it rather half-heartedly, nevertheless gave you an inestimable gift in your baptism. You are a young woman. Give yourself a break and just start with one thing: the Mass. You may not understand everything that’s going on, that’s ok. Just go. Go every week (Sat evening or Sun morning) for a couple of months. Go and sit and bring a quiet mind. Just bring your open heart. Just say, “hi” to Jesus. Try to relax and don’t think about rules and sins and questions.

You cannot be expected, at this point in your life, to “get” everything. If you just take a break from all the wrestling with questions and give yourself permission to approach Jesus in the Mass, just being near Him in that peaceful church can begin to make many things clear, can draw you closer and give you the desire for Him.

Don’t rush things, dear one. Our God (yes, He’s already your God, too) is love! He loves you as if you are the only person in the world. He will answer all your questions, calm all your fears, give you peace you never thought possible. Maybe not this week , but He will definitely meet you halfway!

So now after you’ve received so much thought and conversation, just try to relax and see where Jesus is waiting to meet you.

I tell you what - many, many people who are the most eloquent and passionate Catholics started as you are now: smart, curious, a little angry, strong-willed, skeptical. Relax, go to Mass, and look for the ways God is trying to get your attention!

Love and blessings!
 
I didn’t read all of the responses, so I might be repeating something…but anyway…

I am currently converting from Protestantism to Catholicism. I understand having doubts, however, I have found that mine have been lessened by attending the RCIA program. I had SO many questions and misunderstandings that were answered through attending classes.

I worry that you are focusing on the “rules” rather than the reason why the rules are in place. You are leaning on your own understanding to say that some things are okay, when the Church would tell you otherwise, and really the Church has much more authority on moral issues than what we learn from today’s society. Do research about the questions you have, talk to other Catholics, and best yet, talk to a Priest.
True.👍
 
I suppose I won’t get an answer, so if passionate worship is what you are into, and by that you mean how church makes you feel, yore doin’ it rong. Worsip has nothing to do with that.
 
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