This forum is stressful.

[djconklin]

It is against the CAF’s rules to mention name of such website. It says somewhere on the rules but I don’t have time to look for it.

Did not know that. It wasn’t positive though (i.e., recommending people to go there).

 

[Trishie]

In seeing how many have kindly responded to you, I hope that you feel more welcome! God bless you!

 

[Peter_J]

Unless something changed recently, I think it is only against the rules to invite others to “swarm” one of those sites or to use them to attack the Church. Mentioning them is a good thing since forewarned is forearmed.

I believe you are correct. I note that 1edyson:

• didn’t include the url for any other discussion forum
• expressed frustrations about CARM, but without being uncharitable
  So as far as I can see, 1edyson didn’t violate forum rules.

Just my 2 cents.

 

[Mark77]

If you truly love Jesus, then you will welcome stress on His behalf.

Did Jesus avoid stress?

“And he said to them, 'My soul is very sorrowful, even to death…Abba, Father, all things are possible to you; remove this chalice from me; yet not what I will, but what you will.” Mk 14:34, 36.

He went infinitely beyond ‘stress’, dying for our sins.

Sancta Maria, Ora Pro Nobis Peccatoribus.

Mark

 

[R_not]

I have been a member here for less than a week and I feel very unwelcome. Maybe it is because I am not as good at being defensive with what I believe. So far it has caused me nothing but stress.

I know that I can sound harsh and have been accused of it often. Here is the problem and I can tell you that I have worked in data processing before there was email and personal computers. When the emails first started our workplace pushed emails instead of phone calls (don’t ask - you would think the personal touch would be better, and as time/years passed they actually came to that conclusion too but email was already ingrained into us).

But, what happened is that there was a lot of discontent because of the tone of emails. I have had many, too many, years of dealing with the harsh, pointed emails of demanding managers (I was a mainframe systems programmer) who had no problem with nasty emails, but in person were totally different people! Yeah, I would say that in the meetings quite often and quite frankly got tired of the duplicity.

Well, we all came to the conclusion that the fast, written words of emails - and now blogs - can indeed sound harsh. Things are written fast as it comes off the brain. What helps sometimes are the emoticons, but sometimes they are not used.

Since I have let so much slide off my back over the years that is my suggestion. If you are bothered by someone’s post - then maybe say you are bothered, or give them a private message and ask what is up. If it is downright rude, you can report them - such as if they use foul language, call you a name (well, I have been called a kafir by muslims and that is the foulest thing to be called in islam - but I didn’t report them - I wear that label with pride! But, most people don’t understand that is a foul word and would dismiss it).

Do the ‘count to 10’ rule if you are really bothered and/or get up and take a walk before responding. I don’t always do that, but it does work when I do practice it (I usually take the walk around the block).

When I first started blogging I would blog with the left wingers - and talk about name calling and bashing! They have no problem calling anyone a name if one doesn’t agree with them. I actually learned a lot from them though. When they resort to that sort of thing it is telling me that #1. they have nothing else - no information, no backup, no research, nothing and #2. it is just them calling me what they are.

So, grow some armor and just start posting. Yes, this might mean you have to do some reading to back up what you assert because not everyone will agree with you and many are not able to agree to disagree.

 

[R_not]

If you find yourself getting upset by what people are posting in the more serious threads, take a break. You can also join in with some of the game and story threads, where you can just have fun without having to defend anything.

You are more than welcome, here. :hug3:

this is good advice too. I have done this and have taken 1-2 weeks off. Everyone needs a vacation sometimes!

 

[Reuben_J]

I have been a member here for less than a week and I feel very unwelcome. Maybe it is because I am not as good at being defensive with what I believe. So far it has caused me nothing but stress.

Hi Hero.

Welcome to the forum, if in case I have not wished you so.

Stick around and get the feel of things here. You would know everybody as you go on.

May God bless you.

Reuben

 

[Cat]

I find it stressful when I come to a situation (forum, meeting, lecture, etc.) convinced that I am right, and then someone comes along and proves that I am wrong.

It’s especially tough when you think your viewpoint about God is the right one, and then someone presents a case for a different viewpoint, and you realize that you’re not right after all. If you have believed a certain way about God all your life, and truly believe that it’s the correct way, and then someone demonstrates that you are not correct–wow. It’s like falling off a cliff. Very stressful. It’s really hard to to admit that you’ve been believing the wrong way all your life.

This may or may not be an issue with the OP, but it is an issue with me! I hate being wrong!

 

[emeraldcoast]

I have been a member here for less than a week and I feel very unwelcome. Maybe it is because I am not as good at being defensive with what I believe. So far it has caused me nothing but stress.

Welcome to CAF,

I went through this back in August on this forum. I actually shared with a friend that is an Episcopalian priest my frustration on how virulent some of the attacks against TEC are, and how little tolerance some of the members showed to non-Catholic faiths. Anyway, he reminded me of the Gospel reading of Jesus telling the disciples, “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” It is not fun to read someone deny the importance or validity of the Church that you attend-- Trust me it has made me rethink this place many of times but I remember what Jesus said in that Gospel reading.

I honestly don’t care what kind of behavior happens on another forum – we are here at CAF. We need laity here that are faithful to Christ’s call not trying to denigrate another’s faith.

God Bless!
Your Sister in Christ

 

[withwind]

Sometimes, one can get stressful because he is here for the wrong reason. If one wants to discuss, one needs to let go some discussion that can only lead himself to pride. Somehow, he tends to “fight” (discuss to win) until the end, and there is no ending.

Don’t forget that Jesus also told his disciples to wipe dust from their feet and leave. I am not saying one should leave the forum, but one should leave a thread sometimes.

 

[emeraldcoast]

Sometimes, one can get stressful because he is here for the wrong reason. If one wants to discuss, one needs to let go some discussion that can only lead himself to pride. Somehow, he tends to “fight” (discuss to win) until the end, and there is no ending.

Don’t forget that Jesus also told his disciples to wipe dust from their feet and leave. I am not saying one should leave the forum, but one should leave a thread sometimes.

I agree!

God Bless!

 

[yellowbird]

Welcome Hero! I hope you stick around… try the back fence or clubhouse. You’ll make friends quickly.