This really bothers me about non-Catholic Christians! Funerals

[DarkLight]

I’ve never been to an self-proclaimed atheist’s funeral before, but I have been to small town funerals where the deceased was not a religious person yet the family chooses to have an evangelical Protestant funeral. Those are awkward too because the family would naturally like to hear some reassuring words about their loved ones being in heaven or at rest or with Christ, but the minister knows that the person in question never even claimed to be saved.

Probably even worse for evangelicals! They have no hope whatsoever that the deceased could be saved. We can at least hope and pray.

 

[ltwin]

Probably even worse for evangelicals! They have no hope whatsoever that the deceased could be saved. We can at least hope and pray.

Well, its not that simple. We can’t really know what’s in a person’s heart, especially in the last days or moments of someone’s life. While a person may live their entire lives either as a committed Christian or not, can we really know what transpires between that person and God as they approach eternity? So, we always have reason to hope, but yes prayer is not an option for us after someone already dies.

Often, there will be bedside witnessing and relatives will ask someone if “everything’s alright with the Lord.” Even if the person never clearly responds to these efforts, there is some hope that it might have sunk in before the person passes.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

I’ve never been to an self-proclaimed atheist’s funeral before, but I have been to small town funerals where the deceased was not a religious person yet the family chooses to have an evangelical Protestant funeral. Those are awkward too because the family would naturally like to hear some reassuring words about their loved ones being in heaven or at rest or with Christ, but the minister knows that the person in question never even claimed to be saved.

It was very sad to me because she was such a kind, beautiful, and vibrant person. Unfortunately, she died a few days before her 21st birthday in a freak medical accident. The woman that I attended the funeral with was a very devout Catholic who had been a mentor to both of us as teenagers. Even she thought it was completely inappropriate to have a religious funeral for someone who wasn’t religious. That’s disrespectful to the dead, and to members of that faith. The minister went back and forth between trying to honor my friend’s memory and who she was, and trying to comfort the family. The only thing that made it bearable was that the minister was very aware that she was in the middle of a delicate balancing act and that she verbally acknowledged it several times.

I have told my husband that I do NOT want a religious funeral, no matter how my family feels about it. However, if I die first, in addition to a funeral, he is to plan a small, intimate gathering where my religious friends and relatives can pray together and hopefully find comfort and closure. He is holding me to the same deal. I think that’s a good compromise that honors the dead, and allows the family to band together and grieve in their way.

 

[Nicea325]

This really bothers me about SOME non-Catholic Christians! Funerals.

Why do SOME non-Catholic Christians refused to allow their CATHOLIC deceased relatives to have a CATHOLIC funeral Mass? I have seen this a few times now. On one occasion, a life-long CATHOLIC friend of mine had a Catholic Mass, with the Bishop who baptized him and his entire family present, only to have his ashes later moved to a protestant church about a week later and have and non-Catholic Christian ceremony, where in this case the lady minister spent a great deal of time (3 hours+ total ceremony time) talking bad about Catholics. I finally walked out.

I recently went to a “Celebration of Life”, which I still don’t understand. It was in the banquet hall of a non-denominational church, which I don’t understand… And, the deceased person was a devote Catholic, and an older person… I knew her for 30 years (by way of marriage) and she was a saint. Her Catholic, more senior relatives at the “Celebration of Life” even said to me, “I don’t understand this, I thought she was a devote Catholic”, I shook my head and said “me too” . It’s not allowed but even if it were, I wouldn’t have a Catholic funeral for a non-Catholic person.

So, can somebody who has done this or has experienced this, please explain this to me?

In the most recent case, I believe that the children involved in this decision were all baptized and raised Catholic and then over the years, one by one fell away from the Catholic Church… Some because of multiple marriages and some, for who knows what reason, it’s their business but they all knew how “Catholic” their mother was, so I don’t get.

For my Catholic friends here,

At one point when I heard this was going to happen, I was going to provided my “Catholic two cents” and decided not to. Was I wrong in not interjecting myself into this situation?
I notified my buddy’s family in the first described incident and that’s the only reason he had a Catholic Mass.

What should one do in a case like this? Would you have interjected yourself?

Your thoughts?

Sad! Very sad and very SELFISH! I believe the person should have a Catholic funeral, if he or she were a Catholic. All others need to respect it…period!

What trips me out is how so many non-Catholic ministers talks about God and so on;however, on the same token, they bash the Catholic faith? What a lovely sermon they paint to their community members.

 

[Peter_J]

What trips me out is how so many non-Catholic ministers talks about God and so on;however, on the same token, they bash the Catholic faith? What a lovely sermon they paint to their community members.

Couldn’t the same be said about Catholic ministers who bash protestantism (or Orthodoxy)? I mean the same in the sense that they talk about God and so on, but they bash protestantism (or Orthodoxy).

Granted, I guess that is rarer.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

Couldn’t the same be said about Catholic ministers who bash protestantism (or Orthodoxy)? I mean the same in the sense that they talk about God and so on, but they bash protestantism (or Orthodoxy).

Granted, I guess that is rarer.

Maybe. I’ve never heard a catholic priest bash another faith. Then again, I grew up protestant and I never heard a word about catholics, not even from a minister, and certainly never from a pulpit.

 

[Faith1960]

Couldn’t the same be said about Catholic ministers who bash protestantism (or Orthodoxy)? I mean the same in the sense that they talk about God and so on, but they bash protestantism (or Orthodoxy).

Granted, I guess that is rarer.

I’ve never heard a Catholic priest bash another faith. I’m not saying it doesn’t happen but I’ve never heard it.