Thought I'd Seen Everything at Mass...

[happymommy]

Oh, here’s another one.

So here in the Diocese of Buffalo we have a monthly newspaper-type thing called the Western New York Catholic. Copies are usually located in the same area as bullitens.

Yesterday I saw an older couple (around 60 maybe?) Reading the whole thing during Mass. Not just glancing at it, mind you, like some folks do the bullitens during the homily or something (which is still not cool. :^P), but actually /reading/ it. During the Readings, during the Homily, during any time when active participation wasn’t happening (ie the Our Father and Sign of Peace).

:^P

Father changed it at our Church, they keep the bullitens and any papers locked up until after Mass. You want one, you have to stay until after the final blessing and then the ushers pass them out. People were reading them during mass and then leaving them in the pews or on the floor. Not a problem now!

 

[mullenpm]

Apryl, Could you not have said something to that woman after the Rosary or as she was leaving?

Just as a point of education for her that changing a baby’s diaper in church (regardless of what is going on) is not an appropriate action. Surely there are ladies/gents rest rooms.

Perhaps she was not Catholic and that sort of thing is permitted in her church, or, perhaps she is not a regular church-goer.

 

[zab]

Apryl, Could you not have said something to that woman after the Rosary or as she was leaving?

Just as a point of education for her that changing a baby’s diaper in church (regardless of what is going on) is not an appropriate action. Surely there are ladies/gents rest rooms.

Perhaps she was not Catholic and that sort of thing is permitted in her church, or, perhaps she is not a regular church-goer.

Is there a changing table in the ladies room?

 

[Condottiero]

Father changed it at our Church, they keep the bullitens and any papers locked up until after Mass. You want one, you have to stay until after the final blessing and then the ushers pass them out. People were reading them during mass and then leaving them in the pews or on the floor. Not a problem now!

That’s a good idea. Maybe I’ll drop that suggestion when I see Father this week.

. . . And if that doesn’t work, I can pause during Our Father and lunge across the pews and snatch the offending articles away like some kind of angry jungle cat. :^P

 

[Holland]

I read through about half of the responses and could add a long list of odd, distracting things that I have observed at Mass but I won’t. This less than reverent behavior is an illustration of how rude we have become. My own personal favorite is people who bring cell phones to meetings and have conversations while you are talking or even worse, they leave the room. Its rude and I always make a point of telling them so. People allow this behavior so it continues. Children can and will behave in Chruch if they are expected to do so. My Dad and Mom took 10 kids to Church every Sunday and we didn’t take toys or food. Were we perfectly behaved? No, but I can still feel my Dad’s bony finger flicking me on the back of the neck for playing with the snaps on the pews that held the men’s hats. I would straighten up my act promptly because if I didn’t something worse would come later.

 

[JanetF]

I have an 11-year old daughter. The last time she took food to church she was 2. I have let her take a doll to church up until age 7. Games are NOT allowed, food is not allowed 1 hour prior to Communion. The one thing that gets me is the gum chewers…
The most casual we get with attire is wearing jeans. I don’t allow shorts, or sweat pants…jeans is even pushing it with me, but I believe Jesus doesn’t care what I wear, he just wants me there, paying attention. I agree with those who said it’s one hour a week, can’t we be respectful for that long.
I also turn my phone OFF, not just to vibrate…I don’t want to be distracted. Young children don’t distract me, I enjoy seeing them in the Lord’s house and am thankful that their parents bring them.

 

[Apryl]

Apryl, Could you not have said something to that woman after the Rosary or as she was leaving?

Just as a point of education for her that changing a baby’s diaper in church (regardless of what is going on) is not an appropriate action. Surely there are ladies/gents rest rooms.

Perhaps she was not Catholic and that sort of thing is permitted in her church, or, perhaps she is not a regular church-goer.

My figgering is that she has never been to church.

When the Rosary was done, I walked to our lone usher and said ‘we just had guest to change her child’s diaper in the front row. You could either ask her for the diaper to throw it away, or ask her if she would like to know where she could throw it away’.

He went to look, but didn’t see the diaper. After everything was over, she apparently tossed the diaper in the trash.

I didn’t see a time when I could have approached her in a way to cause anything less than a scene. Maybe I could have, but at that time, I didn’t see it.

 

[Apryl]

Is there a changing table in the ladies room?

I think so. A couple of years ago, we had a handicapped accessible bathroom installed in the rear of the church, right next to the old lavatories. If there isn’t a changing station, it’s certainly a more comfortable place for the deed.

 

[MissRose73]

No one needs a game, food or a toy in church past preschool age. I would only make exception for a child with some form of disability but I am not sure that not all of them could be possibly be taught about no need for one for an hour.

I would much rather a kid of preschool to pre-first communion age (approximately ages 4 to 8 ) be looking quietly at a kids themed book instead of being occupied by any toy.

Once they get their First Communion, then I would subsitute the book for a prayer book or a missal geared towards kids for them to follow along in Mass. Even I as an adult bring my prayer book/missal for Mass and prayer for after Communion.

If someone has a medical need for a snack or a drink then they should go somewhere private to consume it if at all possible. If they can’t leave, they need to be as discreet as possible.

 

[I_Believe]

Question for all who have shared these experiences.

How many of these things happened at a OF Mass ?

 

[Elizabeth502]

Obviously I’m not one of these above posters, but I have seen similar inappropriate decorum at NO Masses. When I can attend my local EF Mass, it never happens. Even the youngest children are normally impeccably behaved. There is one exception: there is one family who are new attendees and the mother is extremely permissive. The behavior of the child stands out because it is so unusual in this setting, whereas in the NO Masses it would be no big thing. (I don’t have anything againt NO Masses per se, but I will agree that they tend to carry the assumption of “anything goes,” often. Tonight when attending one there was a female Eucharistic minister wearing tight short-shorts, which was truly unbelievable to me. It wasn’t that hot. It was maybe 75 degrees outside (although it had been 90-ish earlier). And prior to communion the EM’s stand in a semicircle in the sanctuary facing the congregation, so the visual was hardly subtle.

Don’t know that the NO can be blamed: maybe it’s a sign of the ultra-casual times with no interest in taste & decorum. Amazing the kinds of attire people now where to weddings, funerals, graduations, job interviews, etc. I probably sound stuffy, having been raised with more formal expectations.

 

[MissRose73]

At work, I often see women with revealing cleavage tops and short skirts or dresses. Nothing is done about it.

I’ve seen at weddings recently people wearing tees and jeans.

I do remember at my grandmother’s funeral mass, my sister wore a white dressy suit with a shirt of color. The jacket and shirt fit exposed every curve and cleavage my sister has. Not once did my mother pull my adult sister aside to say that was inappropriate. The shirt i was wearing I concealed the minimal cleavage with a shawl/scarf thing and yet my mother still complained to me about my choice, and I was wearing a dark colored shirt and long skirt.

Don’t know that the NO can be blamed: maybe it’s a sign of the ultra-casual times with no interest in taste & decorum. Amazing the kinds of attire people now where to weddings, funerals, graduations, job interviews, etc. I probably sound stuffy, having been raised with more formal expectations.