Thoughts on Mortification?

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So I’m in the first 12 days of Total Consecration to Jesus Through Mary, and the focus is on dying to the world/self. I’ve always said a morning offering, and some days, I’m good at offering up my sufferings. Other days, not so much.

My difficulty is more interior than exterior. While I can PERFORM the act of mortification, inside my heart is resentful and negative. For instance, I had to go buy sodas for the office this morning, and I bought generic brand. After toting almost 25 bottles of soda to the office and unloading it, my boss tells me I have to return all of them because the employees only drink name brand. So I did it…without huffing and puffing and complaining (too much). But like I said, inside I was not thrilled.

When does the virtue take over? Does it ever? Will I ever ENJOY mortification like the saints did? Maybe it’s a “fake it til you make it” type of thing. Any thoughts?
 
Not sure if the example you gave is one of mortification. First of all, the people in the office only drink name brand??? That’s an excuse if I ever heard one. I don’t’ think you have to feel like you did something wrong and return the bottles to get name brand. Did you ask the boss, calmly and simply why what you brought was not sufficient? Is there some sort of medical problem someone has with generic?

We aren’t to become footstools for others to use. That is not mortification. That is not even humility! Making sure everyone is pampered to the point of narcissistic bliss is not mortification of your soul, its allowing yourself to be used. They can drink generic soda for a day. That’s mortification for them. You don’t mortify yourself for other’s laziness and wants and desires. You mortify yourself for their needs and for the good of all. That would be hateful to their soul to allow yourself to be used and for them to go on treating you with disrespect. This is exactly how people like narcissits gain power over others and get into places of honor where there should not be. Stand up for what is right. Don’t make it a God thing… God is not a narcissist and doesn’t want you to cow down to greedy people.

Not that you should have complained, but you should have asked why generic soda is not acceptable. You deserve a straight answer and a good reason. Your heart might be resentful for a good reason… its telling you you are being USED. Offer up instead any beef you get back from your disrespectful ungrateful co-workers and boss.

Just wanted to add… also, so what if no one drinks the soda that day… take it all to a shelter or some place where there are people who would very much appreciate not just the gesture but having soda, even if its ‘generic’. Humility means just as much that we don’t SPOIL greedy people and pamper their desires.
 
I’m also not sure that saints always “enjoyed” mortification. That to my (sinner’s) mind sounds more freakish than Holy (with the exception of Saint Francis of Assisi).

You don’t have to enjoy it. Our LORD didn’t enjoy His Sorrows. Doing it is enough for the moment.

ICXC NIKA
 
catholic_gal said:
When does the virtue take over? Does it ever? Will I ever ENJOY mortification like the saints did? Maybe it’s a “fake it til you make it” type of thing. Any thoughts?
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This is a great question. The answer is YES: once you develop a virtue, it becomes easier to do the corresponding works, and you even begin to take joy in it.

Consider, though: at that point, once certain mortifications become easy and even joyful, that means it’s time to make greater efforts in penance. You should always be increasing your horizons for virtue as you grow.
 
dshix said:
This is a great question. The answer is YES: once you develop a virtue, it becomes easier to do the corresponding works, and you even begin to take joy in it.

Consider, though: at that point, once certain mortifications become easy and even joyful, that means it’s time to make greater efforts in penance. You should always be increasing your horizons for virtue as you grow.
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Yikes, you’re right. Well, baby steps. I remember a time when I was quick with the tongue to defend myself, very fluent in comebacks. Now, I’m finding undoing all of those lower, natural tendencies (after a lifetime of use) to be trying. I’d much rather flog my flesh than injure my pride. Amazing how (when you really take a look at your inner nature, with God’s help of course) you realize just how wretched you really are.

It’s taken me years to realize (with God’s help, and the readings of the saints) that it’s our duty to squash our lower, base, animal instincts (aka - NOT submitting when your boss asks you to return perfectly good sodas for name brand) to get in touch with our higher calling (aka - to be “perfect as our Father in heaven is perfect.”) The natural response to my situation yesterday was, of course, indignation. But Christ is calling us to overcome our natural instincts for something more supernatural. After all, the King of the Universe didn’t deserve a crown of thorns and the humiliation by creatures which wouldn’t even exist without Him, so why should I expect any more?

Anyhoo, thanks for your reply. I will keep on pushing with God’s help!
 
I highly recommend the book “Humility of Heart” by Fr. Cajetan Mary da Bergamo. I recently read it and was blown away.

It will really help you, I think, to have the right perspective on how to go about this whole “growing in virtue” thing. 🙂
 
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