Thread for single people

  • Thread starter Thread starter DL82
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
I’m a 25 y/o single male and there doesn’t seem to be any Catholics my age around my area that are interested in dating.

I have two friends that are going into the religious life that tell me not to settle for less than a hyper devote Catholic. Of course the problem is the hyper devout Catholic girls tend to become consecrated virgins, Nuns or some other kind of celibate.

This is one reason why I am looking for girls outside of the Church. An of course I am doing lots of prayer to find the one. Novenas and Rosaries.
 
dear cyberwolf

that’s a pretty pessimistic out look… that all the truly devoted are becoming consecrated virgins and nuns (and priests)…
that cannot be so… really?
I would think holiness never belongs to a social position/calling but always is a matter of the heart… It is no surprise that a person clothed in vestments might be much lower in holiness than a lay person who might be a drunk and an out-cast in the eyes of his congregation…
Let us not forget that the Lord created most of us for married life so we should not make distinctions and put people in boxes.
This by the way is one of the reasons why I would not be unwilling to marry a non-Catholic Christian… but thats a different story… but I do think that for many of us who have converted into the Catholic Church, we are more prone to follow our inherited tradition and not choose celibate life even if converts are often known to be more zealous than the pope (and a irritation to their surroundings:)
What to you - and your friends - is a hyper devote Catholic? I’ve meet so many very devoted christian men and women who were married and I always am a bit suspicious when people talk about this as something not-as-good, focusing on the celibacy of our Lord but not on the fact that He too has a bride…
The same with holiness and charismatic gifts… all these things are not bound by vocation/position… but its the heart’s humility and openess to the Spirit of God that constitute real holy love…

in my humble oppinion.
 
Hyper Devout: Follows all of the church teachings as best as they can. Prays Rosary often. Attends Mass more than once a week if able.

Active in the church in some way such as: RCIA, Knights of Columbus, Legion of Mary, being a lector. Well you get the idea. Not necessarily all of them of course or any of the ones I listed. Just that they do more than Mass and confession once a week.

In other words they take it seriously and want to do more. I agree with you on laity vs. ordained btw. Even in some of the classics like Imitation of Christ you can clearly see theres a bias in favor of living in the Monestarices as a Celibate.

One of the issues I think V2 tried to address. That we lay folk are also suppose to seek Holiness in our daily lives.

For my part I can’t find any single females my age around. Catholic or otherwise…

It’ll probably get easier when I find work however ^.^
 
Yep I get the idea…
I hope you succeed in finding such a lady… assume of course that you can live up to your own standards.
a few thoughs of mine… form another angle…hope you dont mind.
The rosary was not a prayer that Terese of Lisieux prayed very often. Neither do I. I used to live such a disciplinary life that people thought I was a mystic on the sure way to a convent -praying all 15 decades every day, on my knees, fasting twice a week, reading Scripture and going to Mass every day… never talking about anything but God…
I had been given the impression that if I were REALLY SERIOUS then that was the least I could do. I did it because I thought I’d get closer to God if I did it. And my selfimage as a serious believer was dear to me… but somehow I was always feeling like I did not do enough and I was often depressed… not that praying was not at times very very sweet, but when I stopped it I also realised what pride I had allowed into my self by means of my spiritual exercises… as if the things that I did defined my worth… but they didn’t not… Today I know for sure that I am loved more than I could ever fathom by Jesus… I dont do all these things anymore that might earn His favour…My goal is unceasing prayer …I dont have to pray set prayers or engage in certain activities… not that they are bad but I know my salvation does not depend on my deeds but on my heart. I know my love matters to Him… my burning heart for Him… and that is all I seek for in a man as well… that He loves and is humble… There are good guys, I especially know many non-Catholic Christians, with these qualities, out there my age (25) but I wait for God to show me who He wants for me… maybe He will send me a humle Catholic… I have no other wish list but only this: virtue as in faith, love, humility, willingness to do what is right and seeking to fulfill the double commandment of love by the Love of Christ, who alone is just.
 
I was feeling really discouraged when I first posted on this thread but since then I’ve run across two very nice Catholic guys recently. Things didn’t work out with the first…no chemistry but he very much the gentleman just not for me. The second well lots of chemistry but it’s far to early to say yet. So don’t give up hope there are good fellow Catholics out there I think we just have to put our faith in GOD. 👍
 
Maria1212 said:
get so tired of hearing the old clique " you will meet someone when you stop looking."
Click to expand...
I hate that saying too. What good does it do when I’ve stopped looking? By then I will either be dead or have thrown in the towel and be overcome with bitterness. I sometimes wonder if that cliche is just a problem avoidance technique that covers up the fact that the person saying it is really trying to say, “Go away, I don’t want to be bothered with your problems”.
 
It depends. Sometimes people are more real when they aren’t looking. Then they show their real selves and that’s what appeals. Sometimes those real selves come into contact and there’s no play. Then people click. We can see through games and I don’t think we fall in love with people when they are trying their best to appear great. Perhaps if they make efforts and if they are so self-conscious, that could be endearing. Isn’t it endearing when a girl can’t keep her hands from shaking? But when we overdo the stuffed shirt or the preening, then we lose appeal. People want natural people… And we’re more natural if we don’t look for mates.
 
I have two friends that are going into the religious life that tell me not to settle for less than a hyper devote Catholic. Of course the problem is the hyper devout Catholic girls tend to become consecrated virgins, Nuns or some other kind of celibate.
Click to expand...
😛 Wow, that’s what I’ve been thinking for so long too about the hyper devout catholic men who I encounter. It feels like they are the ones who desire to become priests. But of course, we need hyper devout persons in marriage too! That’s why I’ll keep looking. I would say don’t lower your standards, especially with something so important.
 
unworthy said:
😛 Wow, that’s what I’ve been thinking for so long too about the hyper devout catholic men who I encounter. It feels like they are the ones who desire to become priests. But of course, we need hyper devout persons in marriage too! That’s why I’ll keep looking. I would say don’t lower your standards, especially with something so important.
Click to expand...
I agree 100%

I will not settle for less just to be married for that is not fullfill my vocation. And i wouldn’t expect my husband to not expect me not to be a faithful devote handmaiden of the Lord. I will take this sole time to develop and deepen my relationship with God for if God is not at the center of both of our lives then how can i expect him to be at the center of our marriage? I will take this time to let the Lord mold me into the women he wants me to be.
 
unworthy said:
😛 Wow, that’s what I’ve been thinking for so long too about the hyper devout catholic men who I encounter. It feels like they are the ones who desire to become priests.
Click to expand...
I’m sure a good portion of them did spend some time discerning priesthood, but many discerned not to become a priest.
 
Ha, single too!

I pray to God a lot, and the Rosary.
It’s been an interesting dialogue between me and God. I ask Him to send me guys, because I have not met ANY guy that’s even worth consideration my first year of college.
Guess what? He sent me about 10. (I don’t have the exact count)
I asked Him to clarify it, by letting me know which one, of guys I know or not know yet, by having me meet him soon.
I met 3 over the next 2 days.
Then one the next week.
Then another one the week after.
But not much chemistry, though they are all very nice, and Catholic, as far as I can tell…Just good friendship type guys.
So I sorta gave up trying to get God to give me the specifics, because He has a sense of humor.
Still kept praying though, but kept it more generic.
And exactly a week ago I met one guy who seems to be the “One”, though I’m not quite sure about that yet. He’s very nice, and we…not exactly “hit it off”, but clicked, if that makes sense? Met him again the next night at a meeting. Was very nice, and did more than any of the other “friendship” guys have done, he drove me to my car, since it was dark. And we talked…turns out my current priest was his former one, etc. It cliked more.
I’m still confused, is he the one? But I’m keeping my mind and heart open. If it’s friendship, then that’s fine. But if God wants it to develop, well 👍
I was afraid I messed things up, but now I realize, be honest about my deafness (I posted previously about this, so I won’t repeat it). And I still worried, because of this one gaffe, did I totally blow my chances? So I prayed again, and one morning I woke up with a phrase stuck in my head.
“Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind”
So if he minds this one gaffe, then he doesn’t matter, and I’ll continue to look for a guy who doesn’t mind. 🙂
Helped me a lot!
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top