To drink or not to drink?

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Based on the description of this guy, I think he is FAR from an alcoholic. I can see, and agree, with all of the things you are all saying about alcoholism. But i also think that this guy is not showing any signs of an alcoholic. Crusader4Life even said that he overdid it at ONE party. That is certainly not alcoholism. I can be fairly certain to say that all of us have “overdone it” at some point, does that make us all alcoholics or budding alcoholics? Of course not! I’m not sure if you are aware of this but where I’m from i would say that at least 85% of high schoolers drink on a regular basis. This does not mean that they are on the way to be alcoholics. I think that alcoholism is fairly irrelevant in this forum at all. Im sorry for those of you who have experienced alcoholism with yourselves or others because it is no doubt a horrible and sad thing. But, i dont think that this guy is at risk of alcoholism because he likes to drink underage. I drank every weekend in high school from my sophmore/junior year on til I graduated. No doubt i did overdo it a time or two, but for the most part it really was within the limits of moderation. Most of my friends did this too. None of us are alcoholics. And aside from that time or two when it was overdone, I dont regret it at all. I dont even look at it as a bad thing. I do drink less now than i did then but, i still do not think that i was out of line to drink in high school. And please dont tell me that teenagers are all too mmature to drink. That is a stereotype. Many of them are to immature to drink, but not all. Thats a personal deal that changes for everyone.
 
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janelle:
I agree with the posters who advised you to run from this guy! If you feel strongly about drinking, you will only be hurt by someone who doesn’t share your convictions.

As the sister and granddaughter of alcoholics, I have come to detest drinking because of the destruction it causes. My husband doesn’t feel as strongly as I do, but after we’d been married for a few years, he gave up drinking when he’s around me. He used to drink maybe 4 times a year, now it’s almost never, and he’s never gotten drunk. If he’s somewhere where there is drinking, and I’m not there, he will have a beer or two. I can accept this, but I don’t like it. It physically pains me when he drinks. I still pray that God will change one or both of our hearts so that we can be in complete harmony about the issue.

I’ll be praying for you.

Janelle
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its very annoying when former alkies equate all driking with alcoholism. As if the drink is to blame, not them. 95% of adults drink without ‘having a problem’ Dragging down the rest of us to make drinking in moderation seem bad solves nothing. Its like a former obese person talking up the evils of enjoying food.
 
You’re right, cynic and Homebrew. The majority of people who drink do not have a drinking problem. And in the true final analysis, the only person who can determine that a person is an alcoholic is the alcoholic himself.

I understand that people who have been through war zones tend to fear that everybody has a gun, even when they’re out of the war zone. It’s sort of the same thing here.

I’ll also note that nobody on this thread has said he or she is an alcoholic. Rather, we are hearing from the people who love people who drink.I’m not sure what that says, but it says something.
 
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cynic:
its very annoying when former alkies equate all driking with alcoholism. As if the drink is to blame, not them. 95% of adults drink without ‘having a problem’ Dragging down the rest of us to make drinking in moderation seem bad solves nothing. Its like a former obese person talking up the evils of enjoying food.
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I am not a former alcoholic and I do not put anyone down for drinking in moderation. I do so myself, HOWEVER, some people cannot drink in moderation. There are many kinds of alcoholics and it is only when the alcoholic person admits to him/her self that he/she is powerless over alcohol and seeks help for himself and not for others that the disease can be brought under control. In other words, no one can make an alcoholic stop drinking and no one else makes someone an alcoholic. Bargaining with, begging, nagging–they will not help nor will they make the alcoholic address the problem. This must come from within the alcoholic himself.

I do not think that anyone who has spoken on this issue and advised caution means to put anyone down. I am not putting you down, but your post sounds so angry. Why is that?.

I do not think it was the intention of anyone on this forum who has advised being concerned was to insult anyone, but, rather to caution.l The alcoholic him/herself is the last one to realize he has a problem.
 
With few exceptions, we have a moral obligation to comply with the law, regardless of whether we agree with it.

For older persons, the issues regarding use of alcohol are more complex of course, but if this person is underage, they should not be drinking – regardless of whether they are an alcoholic, or whether the drinking is “excessive”, or whatever.

Crusader4life, I know that this is difficult, but I would ask your friend to postpone any experimentation untill it is legal. In the meantime, he can enjoy his video games etc.

I am glad to see that you have been setting high expectations – I hope that you will continue to do so.
 
I barely drink at all, becuase it ages you. However I understand some people have a problem with alcohol, genetic even, but it just very irritating when they position themsleves as victims of some uncontrollable external force, kind of like “Mcdonalds made me fat” or “Phillip Morris gave me lung cancer”.
 
Considering he is going to take your decision as final, I would take that as a brilliant sign of his devotion. Also, coming clean about having a little vodka? Sounds like he really wants to make amends.

This sounds good but for stability this guy will need to be a Catholic. From that perspective I am sure he wont want to drink (excessively) ever again!

In Christ.

Andre.
 
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Sam88:
With few exceptions, we have a moral obligation to comply with the law, regardless of whether we agree with it.

For older persons, the issues regarding use of alcohol are more complex of course, but if this person is underage, they should not be drinking – regardless of whether they are an alcoholic, or whether the drinking is “excessive”, or whatever.

Crusader4life, I know that this is difficult, but I would ask your friend to postpone any experimentation untill it is legal. In the meantime, he can enjoy his video games etc.

I am glad to see that you have been setting high expectations – I hope that you will continue to do so.
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Thank you, and I will continue to do so!
 
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Magicsilence:
Considering he is going to take your decision as final, I would take that as a brilliant sign of his devotion. Also, coming clean about having a little vodka? Sounds like he really wants to make amends.

This sounds good but for stability this guy will need to be a Catholic. From that perspective I am sure he wont want to drink (excessively) ever again!

In Christ.

Andre.
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That is true!
I thank God for every good solid effort and step he takes. May it help us reach Heaven!
 
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