To men--have you ever considered becoming a priest? If not, why?

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Rawb said:
I think it is it the duty of every Catholic man to consider the priesthood. I flirt with the idea occasionally. There are aspects I would love about it, and others, not so much.

The real reason, or a major reason, why I don’t become a priest, I think, is because I am the only Catholic in my family. My religion separates me from my parents and siblings by a huge gulf already, but were I to become a priest it would become insurremountable. It sounds like a sad and silly reason, even to me, but it’s real.

Also I have always wanted to have a family, and I think God may want me to provide priests for the church through children, rather than myself.

I’d be a horrible priest anyway. I’d tick too many people off.
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I pray that you will find the clear way, through your discernment! Thank you for sharing. You have an interesting perspective – that all men should at least consider the vocation of the priesthood.

I marvel at all priests who shepard their flocks in ways that only Christ could commission them to do. I pray every day for an increase in vocations–actually for a massive revival to occur…with God, all things are possible. Wherever God leads you, good luck!
 
whatevergirl said:
I believe this to be the biggest decision a person can make…what does God want me to do with this life He gave to me? Where will the talents and time He has blessed me with serve Him and others best? How long have you been discerning, may I ask? (I hope you decide to, if you feel called)🙂
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On and off for 14 years but started thinking seriously for about 3 months now.
 
Dragoro said:
On and off for 14 years but started thinking seriously for about 3 months now.
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wow, 14 years…hmm. That’s a long time…what do you feel causes you to pause a bit over it? (I hope I’m not being too intrusive…just curious):o 14 years is a long time to think about any endeavor! lol:D
 
I spent some time discerning the priesthood. Actually I did this 2 different times a couple of years apart. At times I had a desire to be a priest but at the same time I didn’t necessarily feel that I had the call.

It turned out I was considering the priesthood for the wrong reasons and I don’t believe I have the vocation.

While discussing this with a Benedictine Monk he suggested to me that if I knew that the priesthood wasn’t my vocation and that marriage was then maybe I would have children who grew up to be priests, or monks, or nuns. And he said that in order for that to happen they would need to grow up in a holy family. I had never considered that before.

2008 was actually going to be the year that I began some serious discernment on the diaconate. But, circumstances have change. It will most likely be quite some time before I begin that discernment process - if ever.

James
 
There are some wise and interesting answers here. I am a pre-Vatican II altar boy cradle Catholic with 12 years of Franciscan pre-college education and with relatives who are ordained. The question of a vocation was raised fairly often in my youth. I have no complicated issues of discernment. I have just somehow have always known, really known, that it was not my calling.
 
I have some obstacles (not impediments) that I am in the process of eliminating. I think I will seek to be a diocisan priest–I desire to be on the front lines so to speak. Sure it might be difficult–and even frustrating sometimes–but without labors, where would be the crown of patience?

For those who fear hostility where they live, the Cur de Ars begged God for suffering so that he could convert his indifferent and even irreligious parish. To bring the flame of divine love to where it has grown lukewarm or cold is a beautiful endeavor–one that very closely follows the model of Our Lord 🙂

And if you are sent to a hospital, receive it as God’s holy will for you and draw the rose from the thorns. What better a place to bring the saving love of Christ to the sick who’s suffering may tempt them to despair and especially the dying, who face thier final battles before their judgment. What more could be asked for by one who wants to help souls reach their homeland?
 
Although I am a woman and didn’t consider the priesthood, I thought my story might parallel some of the men’s and provide insight into the process of discernment to the priesthood.

As a young girl (around 10 years old) I had a wonderful CCD teacher. He promoted devotions and encouraged vocations. He spoke passionately about his faith. At this time of my life I seriously considered the religious life as a nun. I prayed and went to Mass on First Fridays.

It just fizzled. Mostly because no one else noticed and encouraged me. Also, because I was teased. With a name like Mary Carol, going to extra Masses, and trying to be good, I got a lot of “Sister Mary Carols”!

My thoughts and reflections on my situation:

What would have made a difference?

I think that if someone had point-blanked asked me and encouraged me to become a nun, I would have. If someone had invited me to a convent to meet nuns and continued to nurture this desire through a formal discernment process, I probably would have considered the convent more seriously. Instead, the lure of our hedonistic culture took hold in high school and college. After many years, the convent simply was no longer an option. The religious life as a vocation just didn’t seem “cool”. Only “weird” people would even consider it.

Although I had a strong faith-filled, devout Catholic home, vocations weren’t talked about much. We had family friends that were priests and all priests and nuns were treated with much respect. The priests who were regular visitors to our home were viewed as regular people with a special calling.

So, in raising our family and teaching CCD, I try to draw on these experiences. When teaching 7th grade CCD, I had one of our parish nuns visit the class every year. The students would write questions beforehand and Sister Judith would present the religious life and answer questions. Some of the questions! For example, can nuns go to the movies? Yes! Can nuns go out with friends to a restaurant? Yes! My conclusion was that many of our children have no idea what the religious life/preisthood entails because they do not interact with them on a regular basis. They have the impression that priests/religious live some kind of secluded, strange life. The children don’t see priests and nuns on a daily basis at school. They do not see them out in the world. (It is also difficult to know who the nuns are out in public because of the change in habits/dress. That is another thread!)

My husband and I regularly talk about vocations with our sons (we don’t have any daughters) from an early age. We present it as a wonderful calling and something every young man should discern.
 
Yeah, I definitely considered the priesthood. I was had some friendly pressure to do so. My mom wanted me to either be a priest or a politician. My HS freshman homeroom teacher - Sister Ann Daly - told me to make sure she was invited to my 1st mass and a few years later my mom’s best friend who was also my DRE at the time (I was in college teaching HS confirmation) as well as someone I considered ‘holy’ was sure I would become a priest. I gave it a bunch of thought and prayer. I knew in my heart I wanted to work with youth (20 years later I am a YM) and I also knew that the priests I knew had no connection to the youth. As a member of a pastoral staff I know that the priesthood (at least at the parish level) is complicated with loads of business stuff and other things that limit the God stuff.
 
dconklin said:
As a member of a pastoral staff I know that the priesthood (at least at the parish level) is complicated with loads of business stuff and other things that limit the God stuff.
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This is a good point and worth remembering. But I think it’s best to see that as also “God stuff”–sanctification can come through regular old work too :). plus, that kind of work is a means to be able to do the more explicitly “God stuff.” 🙂
 
Back when I was in college, I was already heading off into the general direction one goes when you leave home, that is, not going to Mass regularly, etc. I hate to say it, but I might have been on my way out of the Church. But then, a good high school buddy of mine asked me to go to Mass with him (we had gone to Catholic high school together) and I took him up on the offer. It changed my life! From then on, I never missed a Mass and I truly enjoyed it. I became a lector at our parish and even joined a Collegiates for Christ group at my university.

It was during this time that I considered the call to the priesthood. As I look back on it, I probably would not have actually gone through with it, my call was not that strong, but I certainly understood HOW one could be called to the priesthood and how a young man could be interested in it.

Now (this is around 20 years later) it’s too late for me to be a priest since I have been happily married for 14 years, but over the last couple of years I have been feeling a call to something. I took a 2-year Lay Ministry course through my diocese and enjoyed it immensely and I believe I am as ready as I’ll ever be to begin diaconate formation! My wife supports me in this as well.

So, I might not have become a priest, but God willing, in around 5 or 6 more years, I just might be ordained as a Permanent Deacon!!!

Please pray for me…
 
This is a very interesting thread. I am a Religious Brother, age 57, I joined at or about age 45. I mention that because I saw a few folks who felt they were too old for acceptance into an order or diocese. I think the majority of religious congregations and diocese have a 30-40 year old cut off, but not all of them.

Vocation directors, somewhat as a generalization here, have not concidered a the source from which the overwhelming majority of Priests and Religious come from: Public Schools. Most priests have had some or all of their education in the public schools.

Some religious congregations have permanent deacons, but that is still somewhat the exception. Men of retirement age have difficulty being accepted as it is assumed they will serve but a few years – not worth the energy and cost. Humm – I can see that as a concern, but one that can be worked on. A retiree, or one nearing retirement might have the resources to pay most or all their education. Chances are, they do not need a full 12 year program, perhaps about 4 or 5 years. So lets say health permits a 65 year old to get ordained by 70. There’s a good 10-15 years of dedicated services as a priest.

I guess what I’m getting at for the “too old” callings: put your heads together and see how many Bishops out there might give ya’ll a serious look. What I call “child-hood” vocations are no longer the norm. Taking kids at ages 12 to 14 to seminary didn’t take off until around the year 1800 and quite later for many diocese and orders. Young vocations as the norm has a short history in the Church. Matured spiritual calling have always been common and in accord with normal human development.
 
I considered it, even went to a prepatory seminary for part of my high school…the celibacy issue was the deciding factor. I am DEFINITELY not called to celibacy.
 
And if you didn’t feel called, etc…do you discuss it with your sons, and encourage it? If not, why? Look forward to your replies.
Thank you for starting this thread. I do not have any kids. However, I have asked kids of other family members and freinds if they thought of priesthood. A number have said yes. Most have considered quite a number of occupations for when they grow up, priesthood being one. A few told me they thought about it, but they did not think their parents would like that. Key word here is “few” kids told me that. I know the parents and I think they would be proud of their sons if they became priests (same for their daughter’s if a religious calling came). I am guessing that a certain amount of priest or Church bashing from their parents and other adults gave those kids that idea. For some time I wanted to downplay the sex scandals as a reason for avoiding priesthood, but as time goes on I think it has had a strong effect on some who might have been considering priesthood. The young are more affected by these social stigmas (what would my friends think of me) than older vocation prospects.

The most common denominatore, however, was that their parents have not brought up vocations to their children. Part of that is is the fault of pastors and religious of the 1970’s through the 90’s who might have done over-kill in countering what was allegedly coerced vocations on those who did not have or want such a vocation. The church backed off from talking vocations specifically to priesthood and religios life, and that generation did not recieve the influence to encourage thier children.

Part of the problem is the backwardness of our education focus. We tend to encourage a good education and study habits of our children so that they can have the cutting edge over thier peers for better paying jobs. I think more emphasis has to be placed on personal and commual fulfillment through a desire to give-away oneself in love for others , (and of course for God). Go into medical professions out of a concern for the health of others and the society. See law or finances as something to make a stronger and caring community – hope for the marginalized, peace and justice in legal occupations in accord with Vatican II council on Peace and Justice — includes social working type careers. Concentrate today on how kids can do for one another. Our kids might land a big-buck job, but at what cost to family values (or if they become preists - what cost to the church with a materialistic priesthood), and how do they measure success when those jobs dry up and technology advances beyond what they learned in school? I hope they measure it by how they are loved and valued in the community for who they are - vs what they once were.

This sort of encouragent for doing good in school - the Christ centered social values - opens the door for discussions on priesthood. Most will not become priests (after all the human race does need to reproduce), but maybe more would respond to the calling.
 
I myself wish that I had become a priest. I am 55 yrs old now and married; so I cant be one. but if I could get a mulligan in life, it would be to be a priest. celibacy doesn’t bother me (I’m married) j/k 😉 I love priests and nuns and cherish what they do…

As to why I never felt the call, I went to Cathlic elementary school, graduated high school, 4 years Navy, married, children, bills, life got in the way. Then I matured and something hit me… salvation is important!! and I better do what I can do to “guarantee” it as much as humanly possible. And as a priest, what better calling is there then to guide others in their paths towards their own salvation??

Mike
 
Attended seminary for four years (entered after I graduated High school and finished my undergraduate degree at a small seminary in the South). Didn’t become a priest and now no longer practice Catholicism (but that took me 12 years after leaving the seminary).

The clergy of the Catholic Church is full of people who value power more than service. They wish to rule and pronounce rather than lead. Power is their sex, and they use it to demean, belittle, and satisfy their base urges.

In the view of the seminarians and priests, the laity exist only to be berated into following the “Roman Line”. They wish to dominate the spiritual lives of parishioners, not simply point the way to the Divine.

I wanted no part of that.
 
cheese_sdc said:
The clergy of the Catholic Church is full of people who value power more than service. They wish to rule and pronounce rather than lead. Power is their sex, and they use it to demean, belittle, and satisfy their base urges.

In the view of the seminarians and priests, the laity exist only to be berated into following the “Roman Line”. They wish to dominate the spiritual lives of parishioners, not simply point the way to the Divine.

I wanted no part of that.
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Don’t you think that because of those things (I’ve heard some “bad” things too), we should pray harder for them, so they may come back to the right path??
Mother Mary has warned about it and asked to pray for all people who join religious life so they may not lead many souls go to hell.
Anyway, it’s only my opinion. You still have your own.
God bless
 
cheese_sdc said:
The clergy of the Catholic Church is full of people who value power more than service. They wish to rule and pronounce rather than lead.
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I had some directors tell us about getting big heads and warnning us about the temptation to seek power. I have certainly seen plenty of this in the decades that followed. On the other hand, I have seen many clerics and religious who serve humbly and generously. I’ve observed those who bend backwards to appease and attract benefactors, not just for the support of the mission, but sadly for what they can obtain personally. Their tactics are disgusting. I observed the opposite - those spiritual leaders who are generous with their time and their limited resources.

The young also observe these things and make life choices or goals based on what they see and learn. This applies to what they see not only in the clergy, but in all walks of life, teachers, police, politicians, medical people, merchantile folks, etc. We are all related. We did not spin the web of life, but what we do to it we do to one another and to ourselves.
 
You seem older beyond your real years…seriously…I think if you feel called, you should look into it.🙂
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The minimum age for permament deacons is 35 (same as being President of the USA!).
 
Bro_Joshua said:
I had some directors tell us about getting big heads and warnning us about the temptation to seek power. I have certainly seen plenty of this in the decades that followed. On the other hand, I have seen many clerics and religious who serve humbly and generously. I’ve observed those who bend backwards to appease and attract benefactors, not just for the support of the mission, but sadly for what they can obtain personally. Their tactics are disgusting. I observed the opposite - those spiritual leaders who are generous with their time and their limited resources.

The young also observe these things and make life choices or goals based on what they see and learn. This applies to what they see not only in the clergy, but in all walks of life, teachers, police, politicians, medical people, merchantile folks, etc. We are all related. We did not spin the web of life, but what we do to it we do to one another and to ourselves.
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After my fourth year of seminary, I looked around and realized that I hadn’t met a priest that I wanted to be like.

I decided that if something did that to people, it couldn’t be wholesome. I’m glad, however, that you seem to be doing well in your vocation. For me, being a father and husband has been an order of magnitude more difficult than seminary, but it also the most rewarding thing I have done. I am becoming a better person for it (and my wife gets to spend zero time in purgartory 😃 ).
 
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