To obey or not to obey?

  • Thread starter Thread starter melvfe
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Parents that take care of physically disabled children tend to think they know what’s best in all occasions … I would suggest trying to find out why they don’t want you to speak to your godparents.
 
Then I would ask to speak to a Christian (preferably Catholic) therapist or psychiatrist. Tell them you need to be able to talk to someone regarding your disability and how to deal with your feelings about it. Then, you can speak with your therapist about all of the stuff with your parents and the best course of action for you. None of us here know your situation or the extent of your disability, so we are not much help.

Just because you’re disabled doesn’t mean you’re not entitled to a confidante who can help you deal with your feelings - and everyone has feelings that need to be worked through.
 
Erm, for my Godfather, it’s because they don’t want to be embarrassed for disturbing a busy priest and for making them look bad
 
I agree with Sugabee … that sounds like the best course of action. I will pray for you.
 
melvfe said:
Erm, for my Godfather, it’s because they don’t want to be embarrassed for disturbing a busy priest and for making them look bad
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Again- that makes ZERO sense to me. What are they doing that talking to your Godfather would make them look bad??
 
Well, that’s silly, IMO; unless they’re mistreating you in some way.
 
If you live in the US, you have been an adult since you were 18.

It sounds as if you would do well to move out on your own.
 
Disabled people live independently. Speak to someone in the administration of your university, they can help you with getting your SSDI, into accessable housing if you need it, getting home health aide if you need that.

Don’t let your parents keep you because they have convinced you that you are dependent on them.
 
For an adult, honoring your parents is largely a financial term, having nothing to do with obedience. There are advocacy groups for all illnesses and conditions; find one for yours and consult them.

Your parents are not behaving in a rational manner. Please, get to where you are as independent as possible. Why did your parents have you baptized, and choose the godparents they did…then not want you talking to them? This makes no sense. Please…don’t let them guilt you into silence with the fourth commandment.

Can you get to your university classes without them? Ask a teacher about on-campus counseling options. And ask about help with your particular handicap. It doesn’t sound as if you’re bedridden. So, start doing what you can for yourself. It is helpful for your parents, too, who won’t be healthy and able to care for you for the rest of your life. Getting as healthy and as financially independent as possible is what the fourth commandment is about. But, don’t expect your parents to see it that way, now. Do your parents let you go to confession? Tell your confessor-he’s not allowed to break the seal of the confessional for anyone. If he is willing to see you for counseling sessions, tell your parents the truth…that you are obeying your confessor.
 
To be clear: at age 20 you have NO moral responsibility to “obey” your parents. They can make requests of you. It is up to you to judge whether or not you will comply with requests they make.

They have NO authority over you.

If you live with them or are dependent upon them financially, they might make complying with their requests a requirement to continue to live with them. And you will have to decide if you want to comply or leave.

But morally NO you are not required to obey them.
 
melvfe said:
They say I should only talk to them
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You aren’t obligated to tell your parents who you talk to or why, and certainly not to have their “permission” to talk to anybody.
 
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