To the Happily Married Guys: How did you know she was the one?

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James1990

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As the title Suggests… I was curious… How do you guys know the girl was the right one for you? I mean no one is perfect right:rolleyes:

Ladies… You are welcome to put ur take on it too but please say you are a lady because I’m looking for advice to know if she is the one… And dont want to mix up the two POV’s as Im sure the ladies have a different view on things.
 
I never had this one moment of “revelation” so to speak.

It was more like this: as we grew closer, there was never anything that indicated she wasn’t the one. The relationship kept developing, and nothing really ever scared me off about her. That alone was quite amazing to me, that I never really experienced any doubts in our 5 years of dating.

I did have some cold feet before the wedding, but it wasn’t that serious. And the cold feet were related to whether I was ready, not about whether she was the one I would want when I was ready, if that makes any sense.
 
Not married yet, but will be getting engaged very soon. Honestly, you just know. I can’t explain it.
 
GangGreen said:
Not married yet, but will be getting engaged very soon. Honestly, you just know. I can’t explain it.
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I think I agree with you. For many people, you and I at least… you just kinda know. There’s not really much of a debate in your head about it.
 
My father didn’t know. I don’t think he “knew” much at the moment, judging by the tales.
 
When she started talking about marriage, I bought a bus ticket to California. But after about six weeks I started missing her terribly, hitch hiked home and bought an engagement ring. I knew she was the right one when she gladly accepted that .15 carrot diamond ring.
 
VeritasLuxMea said:
I never had this one moment of “revelation” so to speak.

It was more like this: as we grew closer, there was never anything that indicated she wasn’t the one. The relationship kept developing, and nothing really ever scared me off about her. That alone was quite amazing to me, that I never really experienced any doubts in our 5 years of dating.

I did have some cold feet before the wedding, but it wasn’t that serious. And the cold feet were related to whether I was ready, not about whether she was the one I would want when I was ready, if that makes any sense.
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Ditto to ALL of the above! I dated my estranged wife for 6 years prior to our 1 year engagement (30 years married), I had dated 2 or 3 others in that time period as well - I found that there was no one better than her. 😉

The only problem I had was ‘cold feet’. While in the limo going to the Church I was questioning whether or not I was really ready to get married. :eek:

It’s OK…it’s a normal feeling. 👍

Much Peace!

Mike 🙂
 
I was gonna be a priest and I prayed to God I said "if you want me to NOT be a priest you have to give me a good reason. I soon met my wife 😛
 
My husband said he knew when he realized he wanted me to have his children. I asked him once, and that answer was heart melting. 🙂
 
Not sure if an “older” - second marriage - counts here, but in my case, I knew my future wife off and on for close to 20 years - acquaintances - friends - good friends - and finally spouse.
In our case there was just nothing that didn’t mesh - even though for much of our lives we were quite different politically.

All through our marriage, we have each simply had one goal in mind. To be happy by making the other person happy. This requires a lot of mutual respect and understanding.

Now how one sees this in another…that’s the trick.

Peace
James
 
She was the first woman I was able to be ‘me’ around and felt completely comfortable. That was a big clue.
 
Love is a conscious decision. It takes work. You can have a feeling but it is fleeting, and feelings and emotions are not reality.

You can think you may do well with someone but you then must choose to continue and when that choice is made work hard to grow in the eyes of God and your spouse.

That being said I would gladly kill for my wife if it needed to be done. I know I would answer to God, but I just want to make it known that no matter how small the beginning is it doesn’t mean you can’t grow in love with each other.

You will know for sure if you did it right if you get to Heaven and she is there too.
 
VeritasLuxMea said:
Did it work out all right? Do they have a good marriage?
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Apparently yeah, very satisfied and dedicated each of them, although there were problems caused by his somewhat difficult personality and a couple of things he needed to deal with. I actually can’t imagine how they can be happy together given some differences I know about, but they are. But both are Catholics determined to get the best out of what they have rather than getting out of it to search for something more workable.
 
James1990 said:
How do you guys know the girl was the right one for you? I mean no one is perfect right:rolleyes:

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Marriage is the union of two imperfect people who have imperfect children. It is easy getting married but 42 percent of marriages end in divorce in the UK, I think relationships have to be one of the toughest things we do in our lives. The longer you are together it almost seems that the harder you have to work to keep the marriage going. Marriages tend to break down more in times of recession, life becomes difficult with limited money and each partner wanting different things, someone has to give in. Children just test a relationship to breaking point by adding sleepless nights and more strains on limited resources.

When you ask how do you know your partner is the right one, I can only say that time will tell, it just depends on how determined each of you are to make your marriage work. There will be times you get on each others nerves, argue and disagree, things will happen outside your marriage to test your resilience and perseverance. You have to grow to trust each other, this takes time.

I have been married 29 years and we still good and bad times, but I guess we are becoming more comfortable with each other. My regret is that neither of us were Catholic when we married, I feel that faith and trust in God would have helped us spiritually.
 
I would say that there is no way to put in words the feeling of meeting the right woman.

Nevertheless, you will know it as soon as you feel it!

For me, it had something to do with a sense of urgency in putting things where they belonged in the first place. When I met my wife she was actually in a relationship with someone else, and I didn’t really like her.

But then we started to talk to each other and I got to know her better.

Well, from that point on, things escalated very quickly from “I don’t care who you are” to a “where have you been all my life?” situation. We both just felt that being together was something that had to do in order to put things where they should be.

It’s very hard to describe, I’m sorry but I can’t be more precise than that. 😃
 
Most of the divorced people “knew” that she was the one.:rolleyes:
You cannot know!
 
BUMP* Thanks guys, keep them coming! 👍

Really enjoying the read!
 
I had always ‘dated’ plenty of girls, and was just friends with this *other *girl I knew. I NEVER once thought of her as being my girlfriend. I went through a couple breakups and then one girl I really wanted to date broke my heart. I said I was done with dating for a while, but the very next day, I went to the place where the *other * girl was working, and I swear it was like on the movies when the clouds open up, the sun rays shine and the music goes ‘ahhhhhhhh’. I really think I knew at that moment that she was different and very special and the one. I even told the women at work that night (who had just heard me say the day before that I was tired of girls) that she was really different and thought it was something real and felt like forever. We became boyfriend and girlfriend shortly after, and within two weeks, we were both making jokes about ‘when we get married’, but I really think we were both serious…we just knew(and we were only 16 & 17!). It is really inexplicable.
 
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