I can understand where you are coming from, and Iām very sorry you were hurt like that (it was very cruel of htem to speak that way) but I have one big question for you:
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One thing you must come to realize is that even though you say you 'obviously don't want to date guys who rate others girls like this", *you are still accepting what they say as valid! *** Why? **
You know what they are saying is ****, but you still give it validation- and Iām not saying validation as in Iām coddling you saying āhey, they are wrong you look like a supermodelā, no, Iām saying even if you arenāt attractive, you are still giving this meaning, as if yes, attractiveness (as in worldly attractiveness) is what matters. It does NOT! Especially when it comes to real loveā¦ you know that, so why are you letting this notion bother you so much?
Is it because you must believe at least a little bit that no one would want to love you or be able to love you or choose you because you are (in your words not mine!) āhomelyā. * Is that true? * Can you find examples in real life- couples whom you know are very bonded and love each other very much where the woman is not all that attractive in the worldly sense? I can. I can even point out hot male celebrities that married women who are not known to be ābeautiesā in the worldly sense. Yet these men love those women for what those women bring to them. And Iām sure that to these men that love them, they are beautiful just the way they are and wouldnāt DARE let a plastic surgeon touch their wives face!!. Iāll even go further to say that out of all the couples I know, the men married to women who are not āperfects 10āsā are usually MUCH more faithful to their wives than men who married āthat hot girlāā¦ Not saying that about all married men with beautiful wives, but just as you witnessed this crass behavior of these boys, its a sad fact that many of them go for beauty instead of what really matters, and they never learn and hop from one to another beauty thinking physical beauty is what will make them happyā¦ obviously it doesnāt when they are hopping from one to the next. Its either that they are gravely confused and mistaken men, or they are extremely selfish people who donāt care who they use and abuse for their own needs.
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By the way, being more attractive does not increase your chances of 'love', I think its been proven (though society doesn't seem to want to listen to the facts) over and over again that being more attractive puts you in more troubles when it comes to love because it becomes a factor for problems. (You don't believe me, read history- all those pretty starlets... so don't think not being attractive decreases your chances of finding love, its just the most stupid craziest non sense there ever was! (it does increase your changes of coming face to face with lust) What makes a man truly love you, is YOU being YOU to your fullest (with God). All else is manipulation, lies, fantasy and imitation love- aka misery and lameness even if peppered with 'hot' sexy times in-between- it will get old and stupid and worthless the older you get because you will recognize in time it was really nothing, so don't give all that hot sexual romance stuff some sort of credence when it comes to love when it is really lust.
So yes, there is something you can do about it, strive to seek God, make God number one and HE will bring that one to you. Be good, be who God meant you to be according to His Word. (That takes some serious study and prayer by the way, internal private work, not some sort of church group emulation of style dress or copycat behavior- not saying you do this, but that its a common mistake people make.) P.s. if you think you are doomed, you will be, simply because your energy within you will be putting that out and it will block who you are and send out signals that arenāt strong enough to really attract in the way it needs to. So just seek God first, ok? Not this worldly **** that never satisfies.
Believe in Godās Word: Matthew 6:33 āDo Not Worry
ā¦32For the pagans pursue all these things, and your Heavenly Father knows that you need them.** 33But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you. **34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Today has enough trouble of its ownā
.^ Please listen to that and heed its advice.. its not coming from me, its God's very own words. Dear one, please put away this fret. It will do nothing for you but hinder. Find yourself in God. You were wonderfully made. Can you see how? If not, consult with God in prayer, regularly, and do not look to those with wordly wisdom to give your doubts validation. They know nothing. (And honestly, whose to say that not one of those boys in that group actually thought you were attractive to them and just didn't speak up because they were afraid to go against their peer's opinion? That can and does happen, so just kick that stuff out of your thoughts.. its not important what they think, especially if they are not meant to be your beloved!)
