Torn Between 2 Parishes - Dual Registrations?

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I am torn between a church that has a diocesan TLM and an FSSP parish. I like them both. I want to support both financially and with my talents.

Diocesan TLM
– I registered with this parish a few days before I found out about the FSSP parish.
– very pious folks
  • evening, Saturday and Sunday TLMs
  • nice first Friday vigil
    – Coffee hour
    – nice people
    – nice male choir
    – mostly older women and men
    – various ethnicities
    – nice priests
FSSP
– very pious folks
– great sermons
– sense of community
– a lot of women my age
– lots of youth
– mixed voice choir
– very far
– mostly one ethnicity
– nice priests
– love that the whole parish is Traditional and I support the charism of the
FSSP.

What do I do?

I am registered with the Diocesan TLM. Is it crazy to have dual registrations?
 
I have great deal of respect for the FSSP but if it were up to me, based on your description, I would go to the parish where you are already registered. As you stated, it is far closer to where you live. This makes it more likely that you will be able to participate in the life of the Church through more than just Mass attendance. You also mentioned that it seems to be an older parish which, while you would obviously like to have some people your own age around, is never going to change if younger people like yourself do not stay and become active.

That’s my opinion anyway.

Good luck…
 
jwinch2 said:
I have great deal of respect for the FSSP but if it were up to me, based on your description, I would go to the parish where you are already registered. As you stated, it is far closer to where you live. This makes it more likely that you will be able to participate in the life of the Church through more than just Mass attendance. You also mentioned that it seems to be an older parish which, while you would obviously like to have some people your own age around, is never going to change if younger people like yourself do not stay and become active.

That’s my opinion anyway.

Good luck…
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I have thought about this a lot. There isn’t much to do outside of mass outside of the coffee hour. I realize the TLM there is new and that maybe I can volunteer to start some things.

Yet, when I go up to the FSSP, I feel so welcome and at home. A couple has already had me over twice to their house for dinner, within two months.

They took me out after my first communion.

Anyway, these are small things that make a difference.

But you are right. I can’t participate in any of the weekend stuff and even though they’d love to have me in the choir, I can’t even do that because I would not be able to make it to the practices.
 
TrueLight said:
I have thought about this a lot. There isn’t much to do outside of mass outside of the coffee hour. I realize the TLM there is new and that maybe I can volunteer to start some things.

Yet, when I go up to the FSSP, I feel so welcome and at home. A couple has already had me over twice to their house for dinner, within two months.

They took me out after my first communion.

Anyway, these are small things that make a difference.

But you are right. I can’t participate in any of the weekend stuff and even though they’d love to have me in the choir, I can’t even do that because I would not be able to make it to the practices.
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You have been doing a ton of study, try getting involved in RCIA in the parish you are registered in. You would make a wonderful sponsor for someone trying to discern a call to come into the faith. I am also willing to bet that you will also make several friends in the process.
 
while we do not have the multiple latin options, we discussed a similar situation just today here

our home parish has been a part of our life since shortly after my wife joined the Church over 20 years ago and we are active, and they have very many good activities amd ministries by some very solid Catholic people

we have visited occasionally another local parish and find the Mass is just that little bit better as far as reverence, but far more “teaching” during the homily, much more orthodox Catholic references and guidance

while this does nothing to help your dilemna, sorry, I wanted to throw it out there because we are considering dual registrations to support both parishes, at least until we decide if we want to totally switch or not…our fear is that if we switch, come June the Bishop will make a switch of pastors and we will need to look again

I am interested in hearing if anyone has dual registrations and if they have had any success with this or if one is better off making a decision and sticking with it
 
freshwind said:
while we do not have the multiple latin options, we discussed a similar situation just today here

our home parish has been a part of our life since shortly after my wife joined the Church over 20 years ago and we are active, and they have very many good activities amd ministries by some very solid Catholic people

we have visited occasionally another local parish and find the Mass is just that little bit better as far as reverence, but far more “teaching” during the homily, much more orthodox Catholic references and guidance

while this does nothing to help your dilemna, sorry, I wanted to throw it out there because we are considering dual registrations to support both parishes, at least until we decide if we want to totally switch or not…our fear is that if we switch, come June the Bishop will make a switch of pastors and we will need to look again

I am interested in hearing if anyone has dual registrations and if they have had any success with this or if one is better off making a decision and sticking with it
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Thanks for sharing because I sometimes wonder if I am the only one which has such dilemmas. 🙂
 
jwinch2 said:
You have been doing a ton of study, try getting involved in RCIA in the parish you are registered in. You would make a wonderful sponsor for someone trying to discern a call to come into the faith. I am also willing to bet that you will also make several friends in the process.
Click to expand...
There isn’t technically RCIA at any of the parishes. The one I am registered with has one on one instruction with the priest. But I would love to be a sponsor for someone new. If they have that. Thanks for the idea!

And I am also interested in bringing more people to the church as the Latin mass is new and growing there.
 
I have a friend who belongs to 2 parishes. The parish where I belong is her main parish. She moved, and now, we’re a bit far from her home. She a longtime parishioner, and finds it hard to give up our parish.

In winter, especially when the roads are treacherous, whenever she doesn’t want to make the long drive, or just feels like going to the other parish, she goes. She attends Daily Mass at the other parish.

Soon, I won’t see her at Sunday Mass as much. She’ll also participate in fewer parish activities. In the spring, we see her again, and she’s back with us. As to tithes, I know she tithes to both parishes, though, that’s all I know.

She makes it work. So I know, dual membership can work.

P.S. We’ve nicknamed her, Sunshine Suzy, because that’s when we see her.
 
asia53 said:
I have a friend who belongs to 2 parishes. The parish where I belong is her main parish. She moved, and now, we’re a bit far from her home. She a longtime parishioner, and finds it hard to give up our parish.

In winter, especially when the roads are treacherous, whenever she doesn’t want to make the long drive, or just feels like going to the other parish, she goes. She attends Daily Mass at the other parish.

Soon, I won’t see her at Sunday Mass as much. She’ll also participate in fewer parish activities. In the spring, we see her again, and she’s back with us. As to tithes, I know she tithes to both parishes, though, that’s all I know.

She makes it work. So I know, dual membership can work.
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:hmmm:

I guess I also feel attached to the FSSP because that is where I received instruction and I feel really comfortable with the priest.

The difference with me and your friend, though is that she used to live near the parish and moved away. I don’t live near any of the parishes, but I am a lot further from the FSSP parish.
 
You don’t have to be registered at a parish to attend Mass there, or to support them with a regular check.

I normally do recommend registration at your territorial parish, because that Pastor has responsibility for you. If you want to attend Mass somewhere else, join a study group, go to dinner, etc, etc with people from other parishes, that is perfectly alright.

Give yourself some time to explore the options in your diocese and get to know more people both at your ‘home’ parish and any others you attend. Who knows, more young people may move to your area, you may move yourself, etc. That’s a wonderful thing about being Catholic – we can always find a parish, anywhere in the world!
 
Sometimes, not making a decision is actually the best. Maybe, play it by ear for a while, pray, and see what happens. :o
 
Mrs_Sally said:
You don’t have to be registered at a parish to attend Mass there, or to support them with a regular check.

I normally do recommend registration at your territorial parish, because that Pastor has responsibility for you. If you want to attend Mass somewhere else, join a study group, go to dinner, etc, etc with people from other parishes, that is perfectly alright.

Give yourself some time to explore the options in your diocese and get to know more people both at your ‘home’ parish and any others you attend. Who knows, more young people may move to your area, you may move yourself, etc. That’s a wonderful thing about being Catholic – we can always find a parish, anywhere in the world!
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Yeah. I have kind of been through the territorial parish debate. The priest at the parish closer to me said there is no such thing anymore.

I don’t even know what my territorial parish is. Whatever it is, I know I am not interested in attending at all. There is one other EF in my borough and it is not close.

I don’t worship in my diocese at all. 😦
 
Mrs_Sally said:
You don’t have to be registered at a parish to attend Mass there, or to support them with a regular check.
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Thanks. That is good to know.
Who knows, more young people may move to your area, you may move yourself, etc. That’s a wonderful thing about being Catholic – we can always find a parish, anywhere in the world!
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LOL, I am giving the impression that I’m young, but I’m not really. I just look young. I like to say youngish.

But I’d love to meet some women (mothers) with teens like me.
 
I’m registerd at two parishes. I have no clue how the parish in the next town over got me registered but there it was in the mailbox, two sets of the familiar parish offering envelopes. I was like, “Lord, are you trying to tell me to give more meney?” I’ve called the other parish and asked to be taken off the list but they sent me another set of envelopes just the other day. 🤷

TL knows my opinion. Parish life is underrated. I think that the primary environment in which we are called upon to live out self-sacrificing trinitarian love is our families. After our individual families, it is the parish - the community of believers, united around the Eucharist at the parish level. We should be praying with other members of our parish, helping each other, doing business with each other and supporting each other.

It is sad to me that two Catholic families can live in the same subdivision, shop at the same stores and stand in the same line at the coffee shop and not know each other or even know that the other family is Catholic. How can you help each other? How can you know to help each other?

I don’t know that I’ve added anything of value to this thread but I am glad to see that TL is searching for a parish home.

-Tim-
 
TimothyH said:
TL knows my opinion. Parish life is underrated. I think that the primary environment in which we are called upon to live out self-sacrificing trinitarian love is our families. After our individual families, it is the parish - the community of believers, united around the Eucharist at the parish level. We should be praying with other members of our parish, helping each other, doing business with each other and supporting each other.
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I totally agree with this, except to say I don’t believe it has to be your territorial parish.
 
There was an excellent post about territorial parishes by one of our priest posters. I beleive it was in a thread about weddings. Basically, the pastor in a parish is responsible for all the souls in his parish. Where ever you attend Mass, the pastor in your ‘home’ parish is still responsible for you, even if you’ve never registered or attended Mass there.

I’m not sure how you could find the post. Perhaps search for ‘territorial parish’?
 
Mrs_Sally said:
There was an excellent post about territorial parishes by one of our priest posters. I beleive it was in a thread about weddings. Basically, the pastor in a parish is responsible for all the souls in his parish. Where ever you attend Mass, the pastor in your ‘home’ parish is still responsible for you, even if you’ve never registered or attended Mass there.

I’m not sure how you could find the post. Perhaps search for ‘territorial parish’?
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I’m pretty sure I was one of the protesters in that post. 😛
 
TrueLight said:
I totally agree with this, except to say I don’t believe it has to be your territorial parish.
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I chose to live within the geographic boundaries of the parish I wanted to join and joined the parish which covered the geographic boundaries of where I wanted to live. It was a win-win situation, one that I realize not everyone his blessed with. We are in fact, talking about a mission Church which, if the talk is right, would put me within the geographic boundaries of the new parish. Perhaps my opinion on the matter will change when that mission/parish becomes a reality. I hope not.

IIRC, the rules were that the place where you lived determined “Your” parish. But I’m not too big on rules for the sake of rules, especially rules which were created when most people didn’t have cars. But I do think it is important to settle down in a particular parish and to get involved in parish life, to get to know people, pray with them and support each other in a very real way. I hope that becomes a reality in your life.

I’m late for adoration - gotta run. But I’ll pray for you TL, with my new “Rolfes Ropes” rosary. 😉 See forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=607241

-Tim-
 
Just got back from our monthly TLM (diocesan). The “new” choir is great. Just did about three Marian hymns. They are practicing for a Missa Cantata which they hope to do sometime this next year. The priest said “go for it”. Said he’ll try to be ready.

I am also dual registered. The reason we did that was because the FSSP parish in Seattle will not accept Mass requests from non-parishioners.

I believe I would stay dual registered and attend each one as often as I could. Sounds like they both have positive points.
 
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