Traditional Catholicism and Masculinity - Not Feeling Manly Enough

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The two “celeb” Catholics you mentioned also call gay men "homos"and call seminarians effeminate for building gingerbread houses for children. Gordon’s brother publicly mocks “fat chicks.” Is this the kind of man you want to be? Get new heroes – some that represent true masculinity, not some sham version of it.
 
The two “celeb” Catholics you mentioned also call gay men "homos"and call seminarians effeminate for building gingerbread houses for children. Gordon’s brother publicly mocks “fat chicks.”
Stuff like this often makes me wonder what kind of husbands and fathers these men actually are when they’re at home behind closed doors.
 
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If you’re physically exhausted at the end of the day, perhaps you should start with a visit to your doctor. My husband found he had very low thyroid and testosterone levels after I pushed him to see a doctor because he could barely make it through dinner without falling asleep and he was irritable and somewhat depressed! Once he started treatment and his energy came back, he found himself with a better attitude about everything including himself.

That part of your post really jumped out at me, so I would start with a doctor’s visit.
I second this!

I’m a 62 year-old woman, BTW.

Someone above adivsed you to run or do an intense aerobic workout. Do NOT try either of these until you have a doctor’s clearance. It’s possible that you have some kind of physical condition that would make these particular activities unsafe for you.

For example, you may have flat feet, and that means that unless you have some orthotics, running or aerobic hopping around may be very painful for you and even cause damage to your joints (that’s what happened to me, but I am a woman, so there are other issues that hurt my knee joints).

There could be other underlying health issues that perhaps are contributing to your exhaustion.

Clinical depression can also contribute to tiredness/exhaustion. Get checked out for this! MANY men (and women) suffer from clinical depression, so please don’t be ashamed or think that you are less of a human being if you are diagnosed with depression. There are physical causes which you had nothing to do with.

Please, just don’t do anything physically intense without getting the go-ahead from your doctor.

And as a woman, please let me assure you that there are probably women in your circle of acquaintances who have a secret crush on you! You sound like a wonderful man who is open to having conversations and enjoys being a homebody, plus you apparently have a job and you are a hard worker!–there are a lot of women who find these traits very appealing! (I’m happily married for 40 yrs, so I’m out of the picture for you!)

And most women have no objection to a man who is thin and who has a higher-pitched voice. There are plenty of celebrities who have high-pitched voices and they are still adulated by their fans. For many women, appearance isn’t nearly as important as personality traits and habits.

Someone mentioned that perhaps you are reading the “Trad” sites. Please stay away from reading that causes you to lose your self esteem. Many of these men probably are good people with loving families, but believe me, there are men (and women) among us who put on a good image in public, but it’s all a sham–in private, their lives and their health are precarious and sad. Don’t believe everything you read online, in print, or see on TV.
 
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I have low self-esteem, and I don’t really feel very manly, I have so much shame and embarrassment about myself.
Then you need to get into therapy to help work through this.
they represent the ideal masculine Catholic Traditional men. They are really muscular, and Dr. Marshall is really handsome and has eight or nine kids with a beautiful wife, and he also practices Brazilian jiu jitsu.
There is no such thing as an “ideal masculine Catholic traditional man” and what you describe is not MY ideal anything.
and I feel guilty for talking about my feelings because that isn’t really manly either.
So I don’t know where you are getting all these truly toxic ideas about what is “manly” but you need to stop because someone has filled your head with serious amounts of nonsense.
How do I get over my sadness?
Therapy can help.
 
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This frail old man, Brother Roger of Taizé, was one of France’s most influential spiritual figure in the 20th century.

Christ can shine through no matter what one looks like, and attractiveness is a very subjective thing.
 
What or where is your passion? That things that draws you and enlivens you, maybe several things. You are a unique creation of God.
 
Lot of good advice already, but I agree that if you’re exhausted and lethargic a lot you should probably see a doctor to make sure you there isn’t something going on.
 
You know, weight lifting does have a positive psychological effect. It seems to empower and provide confidence. Something about the intensity and the blood pumping through firm arms. It even helps correct posture.
 
You know, weight lifting does have a positive psychological effect. It seems to empower and provide confidence.
It’s the best! Men need ideals to strive for in all areas of life, otherwise we become depressed and perpetually childish. Using and exerting our God-given bodies is a pleasure in and of itself. And the sick gains you get from it just makes it better hahahah 💪 💪 💪
It even helps correct posture
Oh God! Don’t get me started on the posture… (Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)
 
There you go. And lowers A1c like magic.

But careful with the back. I tore a disc.
 
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Listen, often Saint Peter is represented as the very masculine apostle (quick tempered, strong etc) while Saint John often is seen as young, delicate and often depicted even without a beard. Guess what? Peter is the ‘stone’ of the Church foundation but under the Cross is John the one that is there with the Blessed Mother. Two very different apostles but both of them are now Saints and both of them loved Christ greatly. Find out your own way to serve Lord without comparing yourself to people with different personalities, background or personal circumstances.
 
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