To Blue Horizon:
//LG can detail what you mean/experience by “I am in a period of spiritual dryness” and
“I love to conetmplate.” How old are you and what is your ethnic/religious background and history?//
By dryness I mean I don’t feel motivated to pray. I still do my spiritual reading but that’s about it. I don’t even want to go to Mass because of something new our church is doing that is really irreverent and making me sad. I feel alienated from the people at my church and alone. I dropped out of some church-related activities due to my new job and because I don’t feel like doing them anymore. I often think, what’s the point. I just don’t want to do anything!
I love to think about the mysteries of Christ, the incarnation, the eucharist. Alot of things bring my mind back to this, in movies and in art. Sometimes I just sit and think- I can’t explain it well. Just today, before Mass, I sat and stared at the altar, thinking of what it meant and how important it was…
I am 28 years old.
I grew up Evangelical Protestant. I read alot of the Bible and memorized it. Now as a Catholic I understand it! This is part of why I love Scriptures so much. All the stuff I used to read I can understand now. Been Catholic for 5 years,
No more questions! lol
Thanks LG
I have to be honest and say I do not have much experience re converts from Evangelical Protestantism.
What I can observe though is that Evangelical modes of worship well cater for use of imagination and human affective (not effective) needs in the journey to God. Catholicism (if you get the good stuff) tends to better address the needs of the mind both rational (by a very metaphysical and tight theology) and intuitive (through out modes of mystical devotion).
That you pursued Catholicism despite your background suggests you are a more rational/intuitive sort of personality … yet now the lack of affective, communally-connected experience (Catholics are a bit passive in that area) may be starting to kick in. That you are not a “cradle Catholic” may contribute to a feeling of not really being fully part of your present parish despite the social activity you mention. Catholics can be a bit “old boys/girls club” that way sometimes. (Or maybe you are not having this experience at all - hard to say from your comments).
I suppose I am saying that maybe you have strong affective needs (despite your announced rationality) that were answered in your old church (but you weren’t aware of that) and now they may not be. It appears that your more private, interior “mystical” experience, which I see you love, may have been compensating for the lack of external communal affectivity/connection. Possibly you are realising your interior life is not adequately compensating for the lack of exterior emotional support that we all need (some more than others).
It is very difficult to discern, in the spiritual life, whether dryness indicates we need to mature and let go of the sweets of immaturity (this is the usual Catholic advice) OR we have somehow gotten ourselves into a situation where somehow our very real and valid personal needs are seriously (and even dangerously at times) not being met. I cannot remember who said, “great pain is God’s megaphone that we’ve gone the wrong way!” its not always true, but it is good balancing advice.
Sometimes the answer is both.
What do you think re your present situation?
Obviously it is not “great pain”, but it could be a symptom that you are somehow unwisely or clumsily ignoring valid emotional needs. (If this is the case there is often an embarrassing, barely conscious “taperecorder” or a daydream that keeps playing in our head which we keep ignoring pushing into the dark.). If it increases in intensity as our pain increases … this is significant.
Does this mean anything to you?
If not just forget my advice. Your dryness is no more than the usual spiritual maturation process. Attend to the usual suspects … the Sacraments, the Commandments, love of neighbour, personal prayer (it needs to become less imaginative, emotional and exploratory and become more simple, a letting-go of your will and of active thinking - more about being passively attentive without much interior visual content)…and all will be well.
As the Cure of Ars once said to someone who asked him how he spent his hours daily sitting in the quiet pews of his own church, “Well, I just look at Jesus and he looks at me.” He was speaking of a “sensed” presence deeper than that of the visible, plaster crucifix above the altar. Whatever happens in your life don’t give up “chasing” (or rather “being chased”) by that prayerful presence. And when it abides with you in Church, then try and take it with you outside into daily life.
Re the spiritual reading - look up “lectio divina” - it should lead, for beginners, into meditation (look that up also). A time comes when meditation has to be dropped (which can become torture if you hold onto it too long) and go into “contemplation”. I am not sure you understand these words in the traditional Catholic sense, everybody means just about everything by them. Online Catholic Encyclopedia may be helpful,
Our new priest has wonderful enthusiasm but he is very focused on making us feel welcome and happy- to the expense of a reverent liturgyy (which is the small problem I stated above). No one seems to care about improving anything but appearances. Devastatingly, at least in my opinion, is the utter lack of persons my age. I don’t feel like there is anyone I can relate to (and I don’t believe there is) I just can’t live in that environment LOL but it is the only place I can go to Mass so I force myself to go.
) could keep both my SD and me in your prayers as well. Many thanks in advance, and God bless you! :hug3: