Im going to confession this weekend, Ive been there many times over my habitual sins, Ive probably worn the wood of the pew.
I would like to know what is required to have true remorse and be sorry for my sins. Ive tended to treat it as a routine, sin, confess, sin, confess.
How should i prepare myself to be truly resolved to try my hardest, to feel remorse for my sins, not recommit them constantly. What does it take for a true, honest confession knowing if i were to die straight afterwards i would have died in a state of grace.
You should bring the matter to the Priest in confession.
For a mortal sin -one needs to be contrite and resolved not to do it again. And one is of course to avoid the near occasion (that which would lead one to commit it). We are to confess all mortal sins in number and kind (murder 3x, adultery2 x, fornication 2x).
One need* not *have though a particular “feeling” happen.
If one treated it as a routine, that can be a problem - tell the Priest that. But it is likely you mean that you have been struggling with such and you feel like you have been treating it like a routine -though in reality you have been resolving there and then to not commit mortal sin and but have had struggles with such even though one has had this resolution.
I matters too what one means by “routine”. There is a difference— in say one having the idea that I will just do this thing every week and confess it – (I am referring here to mortal sins here) --one is basically intending to keep doing the mortal sin…not repenting. That would need to be addressed in confession (along with the past sins…).
And
–say one* struggling* with sins – repenting at confession (in the will) but fearing due to weakness that one will fall into such again (or even knowing it is likely given ones weakness and past) -though one is resolved not to and to avoid such etc. Yet one falls into the same sin often. Again and again…that is very different than not repenting. One feels now bad about the repeated falls and wants so much to get rid of a particular sin (that is good).(the book Searching for and Maintaining Peace -
http://www.frjacquesphilippe.com/books can help one…)
Also remember contrition -while “feeling” can be involved and it is good to be involved -such is *not necessary *–it is more a matter of the will (and the grace of God).
In any case the Priest can guide you - tell him what you told us here and discuss this matter that I have discussed here.
It is very very good that your taking this seriously and seeking to make a very good confession!
Jesus of Nazareth -loves you - he is the Lamb who takes away our sins-- the Good Shepherd who gives laid down his life for us --who gives us* true life*! (including in confession!)
“Jesus is called the Lamb: He is the Lamb who takes away the sin of the world. Someone might think: but how can a lamb, which is so weak, a weak little lamb, how can it take away so many sins, so much wickedness? With Love. With his meekness. Jesus never ceased being a lamb: meek, good, full of love, close to the little ones, close to the poor. He was there, among the people, healing everyone, teaching, praying. Jesus, so weak, like a lamb. However, he had the strength to take all our sins upon himself, all of them. “But, Father, you don’t know my life: I have a sin that…, I can’t even carry it with a truck…”. Many times, when we examine our conscience, we find some there that are truly bad! But he carries them. He came for this: to forgive, to make peace in the world, but first in the heart. Perhaps each one of us feels troubled in his heart, perhaps he experiences darkness in his heart, perhaps he feels a little sad over a fault… He has come to take away all of this, He gives us peace, he forgives everything. “Behold, the Lamb of God, who takes away sin”: he takes away sin, it’s root and all! This is salvation Jesus brings about by his love and his meekness. And in listening to what John the Baptist says, who bears witness to Jesus as the Saviour, our confidence in Jesus should grow. Many times we trust a doctor: it is good, because the doctor is there to cure us; we trust in a person: brothers and sisters can help us. It is good to have this human trust among ourselves. But we forget about trust in the Lord: this is the key to success in life. Trust in the Lord, let us trust in the Lord! “Lord, look at my life: I’m in the dark, I have this struggle, I have this sin…”; everything we have: “Look at this: I trust in you!”. And this is a risk we must take: to trust in Him, and He never disappoints.”
~Pope Francis
vatican.va/holy_father/francesco/homilies/2014/documents/papa-francesco_20140119_omelia-parrocchia-sacro-cuore-gesu_en.html
"Jesus is the “Good Shepherd” who goes in search of lost sheep, who knows his sheep and lays down his life for them (cf. Mt 18:12-14; Lk 15:4-7; Jn 10:2-4, 11-18). He is the way, the right path that leads us to life (cf. Jn 14:6), the light that illuminates the dark valley and overcomes all our fears (cf. Jn 1:9; 8:12; 9:5; 12:46).
He is the generous host who welcomes us and rescues us from our enemies, preparing for us the table of his body and his blood (cf. Mt 26:26-29; Mk 14:22-25); Lk 22:19-20) and the definitive table of the messianic banquet in Heaven (cf. Lk 14:15ff; Rev 3:20; 19:9). He is the Royal Shepherd, king in docility and in forgiveness, enthroned on the glorious wood of the cross (cf. Jn 3:13-15; 12:32; 17:4-5)."
~Pope Benedict XVI
vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/audiences/2011/documents/hf_ben-xvi_aud_20111005_en.html