Trying to define a particular sin

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JoeFreedom

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I’m going to confession today again, mostly since I haven’t in a few months, and partly because I’m somewhat scrupulous on a particular sin (that is due to my sinful past, and finally truly trying to become obedient to God, that I fall into the trap of thinking I’ve lusted every time I happen to glance at an attractive woman and find “thoughts” popping into my head and believing I’ve mortally sinned even though I don’t dwell on them), and therefore knowing that I have not committed any other mortal sins, I don’t go, because I’m trying to live the direction of “if you can’t under oath say it is a mortal sin, don’t confess it…”

But anyways, as I’m going through an examination of conscience, since there is something else I want to confess (likely not mortal, and not having to do with the following).

My question really revolves around this: I don’t particularly believe I’ve committed calumny (lies) or detraction (revealing truth about one’s hidden sins) or gossip (oh my gosh, she’s dating so and so…), but I will generally speak negatively of others that I feel have done a poor job at work (in my opinion). Such as, “I think she is the worst project manager ever. The project was a complete disaster and I can’t believe she is still employed”. I know this is not good, but what is this sin called? These are my opinions, so it is not an outright lie, but it isn’t so much revealing a hidden sin, and it is not talking about what someone is doing scandalously… so what is it? I’ve always just confessed that I speak negatively of others, but it likely has a name, or maybe I’m not understanding calumny, detraction, or gossip correctly?

Thanks.
 
I’d recommend just asking the priest at your next confession how you should confess it. And since you mentioned you have some scruples on this particular sin, also ask the priest for some guidelines perhaps. That should help you the best I’d imagine.
 
The things you try hardest to repress are often the very things that come to the surface. The harder you repress them, the more ways they find to break loose. Finding creative channels is a good way to put your shadow to work, because you cannot control your subconscious. It’s there and needs to be dealt with. In the meantime, it might help to accept that you’re human. That’s not a bad thing.
 
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Just tell the situation to a priest. Then ask what this sin is named.
 
That particular sin could fall into the category of a couple of murky channels. They are murky because we really don’t know the proper 'channel. One could be the sin of judgment. One could be the sin of gossip. Another could be the sin of scandal and or gossip. Another might be a sin of jealousy. It is possible your transgression are all of the above. I don’t know. So your very best recourse is to discuss it within the confessional. For forum members to try to give advice on this is something akin to a long distance romance or relationship. Sometimes the train falls off the track. Go see Father in the confessional.
 
Keep confession short and brief:

Against the 1st Commandment I have sinned X times.

Against the 2nd Commandment…

Against the 3rd I have sinned X times…

Use every commandment you need, but, no details. Kind and number. The priest will ask you for more detail if he wants it.

No priest has ever said “Oh, I wish my parishioners would give more minute details in the Confessional,”
 
Scruples are a symptom of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder manifested in a religious context. If you were Hindu you would be worrying that you ate meat. If you were a Jew you would be worried you worked on the Sabbath. If you were an atheist humanist you would be worried that you caused harm to someone else. See a doctor. It is an issue based in the biochemical processes in your brown. It is not spiritual in origin. We know this because other chemicals can counteract the scruples in many cases. Your case may be easy or difficult to treat and I am not here giving any advice about how you should be treated there than that you should discuss the matter with a scientifically trained professional. There is nothing wrong of course in telling your spiritual advisors that you intend to do this.
 
I don’t think listing the commandment the sin is against is sufficient to cover kind though e.g. a sin against the sixth could be watching porn, masturbation or adultery.
 
I did. I never really get direction or clarity with this paticular priest for those aspects. He didn’t classify the sin nor identify it. He basically said just think about what Jesus would say if he were next to you when I did that. He absolved me and I made sure to tell him I wasn’t confessing my scrupuluous sin since I couldn’t guarantee I had done it.
 
JoeFreedom said:
I’ve always just confessed that I speak negatively of others, but it likely has a name, or maybe I’m not understanding calumny, detraction, or gossip correctly?
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It sounds like you are not far from a good understanding. The Catechism teaches that we should respect the reputation of others. It does not depend on whether the other person sinned. It is about whether we harm the other person, or avoid harming them.

Reuben_J a few posts back emphasized charity. If we love one another, how should we speak about one another? How can our speech (or our writing) help the other?

Here is the passage from the CCC:
2477 Respect for the reputation of persons forbids every attitude and word likely to cause them unjust injury. He becomes guilty:
  • of rash judgment who, even tacitly, assumes as true, without sufficient foundation, the moral fault of a neighbor;
  • of detraction who, without objectively valid reason, discloses another’s faults and failings to persons who did not know them;
  • of calumny who, by remarks contrary to the truth, harms the reputation of others and gives occasion for false judgments concerning them.
2478 To avoid rash judgment, everyone should be careful to interpret insofar as possible his neighbor’s thoughts, words, and deeds in a favorable way:

Every good Christian ought to be more ready to give a favorable interpretation to another’s statement than to condemn it. But if he cannot do so, let him ask how the other understands it. And if the latter understands it badly, let the former correct him with love. If that does not suffice, let the Christian try all suitable ways to bring the other to a correct interpretation so that he may be saved.

2479 Detraction and calumny destroy the reputation and honor of one’s neighbor. Honor is the social witness given to human dignity, and everyone enjoys a natural right to the honor of his name and reputation and to respect. Thus, detraction and calumny offend against the virtues of justice and charity.
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To directly answer your question, I think it would be detraction.
 
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