Rhonda,
I just posted on another thread about depression/spiritual struggles,… I wrote as follows:
"…I have been experiencing a very serious bout with depression and anxiety for the past 4 months. I am seeking treatment, but many days seem like an absolute struggle… I too have the feeling like I want the struggle to be over and just want peace. I am not having the same struggle with sin as you seem to be having (don’t get me wrong, I am still very much a sinner)… but I also get frustrated when people tell me just to pray more or go to Mass and confession more (I go to Mass daily and confession monthly, I also pray a holy hour each day–I just mention this to make the point that prayer does not always ensure spiritual/psychological peace).
I have looked at other people–and said to myself–why is this happening to ME… I try to be faithful to God… why am I thrown into this darkness.
One thing that I have learned through my experience is that, I have been made to totally rely on God EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE for my own survival. That is a humbling thing… and I hope that it is something that will transform me. God can bring all kinds of grace and good out of the darkest of things. It helps me just to say to God–'God, I am not going to worry about my suffering or the future… I am just going to pray this rosary, read the Bible, or pray before the Blessed Sacrament and be with you… I am going to let You worry about me for a change.
Take one day at a time… learn what it really means to Trust.
Let us pray for one another. You are definitely not alone. "
I just wrote this to let you know that there is yet one more person who is in spiritual solidarity with you. It also strengthens me to know that there are others out there struggling with the same thing. My depression is also largely biochemical and, whatever emotional/situational factors may be involved… they are a mystery to me. Depression is a widespread and yet rarely discussed problem. I think it is a good thing to be able to bring it out into the open.
Some books that I have seen on depression from a Catholic perspective:
Surviving Depression: A Catholic Approach
amazon.com/Surviving-Depression-Kathryn-James-Hermes/dp/0819870773/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-2624354-6792639?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1174920270&sr=8-1
Protect Us from All Anxiety: Meditations for the Depressed.
amazon.com/Protect-All-Anxiety-Meditations-Depressed/dp/0879461845/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-2624354-6792639?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1174920347&sr=1-1
The former was written by a religious sister, the later by a parish priest. I have not read much from the priest’s book because I started reading it when I just was diagnosed, and somethings he wrote about (his spiritual anguish) were scaring the **** out of me. Now, I have experienced depression a little bit and would be strong enough to read about it. The main thing: these people got through, so can the rest of us.
Maryam, thanks for the reference to the Guild website… never heard of it before.
Let us pray for one another.