Two weddings OK?

[Olympia]

Heard this at the beauty salon today:

A lady was discussing her niece’s weddings, which were to take place this coming weekend:

"Her parents wanted them to have a Catholic wedding, but it would have to be before 2 pm on Saturday, and they wanted their reception at this special place, and the reception was scheduled for 7 pm. It was too long a time for guests to wait for till 7 pm, so the Catholic wedding will be on Friday night.

The bridal dress, veil, and some kind of ceremony (not specified) will take place on Saturday, before the 7 pm reception. (Most wedding receptions in this area can be very lavish affairs, it was not specified just how lavish this one would be.)

Doesn’t seem right to me, the sacrament is being downplayed. Any thoughts?

 

[John_Higgins]

Canon Law prohibits two ceremonies. What I would do, if they had to have some kind of something on Saturday before the reception, is to have the priest do some kind of short homily and a blessing of the couple. That certainly wouldn’t be another celebration of marriage, but it might fill the bill.

What I don’t understand is what’s the big deal with having a Mass before two and the reception at 7? Many people don’t go to the church anyway.

John

 

[stbruno]

When we do marriage prep…we strongly remind the couple that we are here not only to plan your wedding day, but to teach you that marriage is a lifetime work. It is a sacrament you receive daily…just like the Eucharist. Christ is fully present in their marriage if they are getting married in the church. You have invited him to be a witness, and he is more than just a silent observer…he is part of your marriage bond. He is the third strand in a bond that make it even stronger, if you allow Him. So if all you are concerned with is the wedding day, then you have the notion all wrong. Too often all the emphasis is placed on the actual party rather than the sacrament itself…and the gift of man and woman on a daily basis. Let us pray for this couple!

 

[Olympia]

Thank you for your thoughts. On second thought, I am not quite sure that a second cermony was planned. But the gala wedding dress, veil, flowers, bridesmaid, reception party etc. would be taking place the next day. Somehow I thought that another ceremony was also planned, but to be fair, I may have been mistaken on that point.

In either case, I think that the Sacrament of Matrimony is being sidelined at this event. I have often noticed that people don’t just want to get married, they want a Wedding with a capital W! I also think those who go only to the reception are also missing the point of the celebration.

Another friend of mine also gave the sugggstion that we should pray for this couple, just as St. Bruno did!

 

[Kielbasi]

John writes:

Canon Law prohibits two ceremonies

Canon 1127 actually reads

§3. It is forbidden to have another religious celebration of the same marriage to give or renew matrimonial consent before or after the canonical celebration according to the norm of §1. Likewise, there is not to be a religious celebration in which the Catholic who is assisting and a non-Catholic minister together, using their own rites, ask for the consent of the parties.

A lot of Catholics have two marriage ceremonies, as long as there is only one religious marriage ceremony, its good to go. In fact in many nations, priests aren’t commissioned by the state to officiate at marriages, so you’d have to have 2 ceremonies if the marriage was to be legal.

 

[Bobby_Jim]

Olympia:

In either case, I think that the Sacrament of Matrimony is being sidelined at this event. I have often noticed that people don’t just want to get married, they want a Wedding with a capital W! I also think those who go only to the reception are also missing the point of the celebration.

I don’t know the couple in this case… but too often it does seem like it’s all about the wedding, and not about the marriage. You certainly see this in celebrity weddings, but it’s also becoming more common for non-celebs - the couple spends so much time focusing on planning the perfect wedding and the perfect day, that they don’t pay much attention to how they’re going to spend the rest of their lives together after that one day.