Two year old picky eater

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I have a two year old son who is super picky about what he eats. Tonight we had smoked ribs and chicke, roasted asparagus, beans, and I have the kids a strawberry. He don’t touch any of it. This happens regularly at meals unless its something like noodles or Mac and cheese. He eats like a bird when he does eat. 2-3 bites and he’s done. We don’t do a lot of snacking. Experienced parents out there have some advice? I’ve got a 10 month old and another one on the way. Would like to get good habits going now. Not willing to be a short order cook for everyone.
 
I have a two year old son who is super picky about what he eats. Tonight we had smoked ribs and chicke, roasted asparagus, beans, and I have the kids a strawberry. He don’t touch any of it. This happens regularly at meals unless its something like noodles or Mac and cheese. He eats like a bird when he does eat. 2-3 bites and he’s done. We don’t do a lot of snacking. Experienced parents out there have some advice? I’ve got a 10 month old and another one on the way. Would like to get good habits going now. Not willing to be a short order cook for everyone.
This is normal for toddlers. Really, don’t worry. He won’t starve!

It is your job to prepare appropriate, nutritious meals, and it’s his job to eat them. It is NOT your job to force or cajole him into eating. If he chooses to eat two bites, simply put the plate in the fridge and bring it out next time he’s hungry. If you turn meal time into a battle or a power struggle, YOU. WILL. LOSE.
 
We have one main rule, you must at least try everything offered. I’ve had meals where either my daughter or my son, only have one bite of everything offered. Which is fine, if they were truly hungry they’d eat. I try make sure to offer something that I know they like each meal, especially if we are introducing something new.

My son is 15 months, and like me, becomes anemic extremely easily. We offer him his meat first, about a TB. After that he gets the rest of his meal. He is texturally picky and goes nuts for bread/rice/grains. Due to money, it isn’t possible to reduce his intake by a whole lot, so we rely on good ol’ casseroles.

I’ve lucked out a bit with mine because they both love peas, I used that when I know they are starting to get full, but they are still asking for more.

My daughter is 3 and has become more vocal with her choices. She’ll suddenly say “I can’t like it.” when the day before she gobbled it down. I take it with a grain of salt, and just re-introduce it another day.

Each child is so different when it comes to these things, that I’ve found that it is best to just let them be picky, but also request that they try new foods.
 
Eat as a family- let him observe other people eating/enjoying the food. NOT in an over-the-top “Mmm I love XYZ” way, but just the normal course of the meal.

Have him help prepare the meal. Can he cut up soft carrots? wash some veggies? Pour/Mix a marinade? Shake something to mix it up, then put into the pot? This helps my daughter more than anything become interested in trying what I serve.

Put it on his plate. Even if he doesn’t eat it “you don’t have to eat it, but it needs to sit on the plate like Mommy/Daddy,” it sits there, and he becomes familiar with how it looks.

Don’t force the issue; serve what you serve. Try to include at least one side he will eat; don’t cook a separate meal for him. If he doesn’t eat dinner, he may be hungrier for the next meal, so keep that in mind when serving the next meal.

I’ve used that approach with all my kids, and they are all very good eaters. We ignore the “I don’t likes,” we do NOT force trying it, and we are as no-pressure as we can be.

You are not hungry all the time, I assume- it’s fine for him to eat less/more at different times, too, or not be in the mood for something in particular 🙂

Y’know I’m remembering a phase with all my kids around the 20-26mo age where they were “picky,” and we ate a lot of spaghetti/casserole (for meat), and I’d feed them (only at dinner) at the end, if they were willing to let me. They were getting frustrated with silverware, but didn’t want to use their hands, and would just sit there/say they were done. COLD hardboiled eggs are good for protein, too, esp if they are just young enough they think it’s cheese…
 
This is a normal phase for toddlers. I wouldn’t worry about it. He won’t starve himself, and will eat when he gets hungry. I like the suggestion of encouraging him to at least take one bite off of everything on his plate before he gets up though.
 
Please don’t cater to his food whims. Fix whatever you are fixing for the family, give him a TINY bite of each food on his plate, and let him eat or not eat. If he doesn’t, just make sure he has a vitamin, dump the food and try again at the next meal (don’t serve him the leftovers). Just because he likes something a lot, don’t serve it to him at every meal, no matter how scared you are that he will starve. Chances are very good, that he will not, and he doesn’t need a ton of food at the moment. Never force him, never try to coerce him, the less you say about the food and eating, the better. Make mealtimes a pleasant, happy time. No raised voices, no arguments. Pleasant conversation, no TV on, no other distractions. Talk to him as you eat, smile at him. Do make noises if you like something, “mmmm,” but don’t exaggerate to try and coerce him into eating.

Try giving him thawed frozen peas, still cold. Even a couple will help satisfy his need for healthy food at comfort you that he is not going to be deprived of nutrients. Mainly, you want him to understand that if he is hungry, he needs to eat the food that is being served to the family, not whine and cry for his favorite food. That can give him way too much power over you and other people in his life.

The less fuss you make now, the easier it will be when he takes a growth spurt and wants to eat everything in sight, multiple times a day. That too, should not be made into a big deal, just keep healthy food on hand that he can snack on.
 
I am in my 70’s. One thing I remember about eating from my childhood. My father was an old fashioned very strict German. Because he was by profession a Hotel Chef d’ Cuisine, he was rarely home for supper.
Anyway one time when I was about 7 years home Papa was home for supper and during the meal, my mother asked why I wasn’t eating a certain vegetable (I forget what it was) and I whined that I didn’t like it. Instantly, Papa slammed his hand flat down on the table hard enough to make the plates jump and roared in German: “Its good for you, you have to like it!” I quietly began to eat my veggies instead of waiting for my world to come to an end.
I had a similar occurance with each of my three boys, Same thing happened, only I used English. Guess what, it worked and it ended all fussiness at our table! Both of my living sons today are quite sophisticated in their eating habits, and are no strangers to adventurous dining!
 
My family are raw vegan and at time macrobiotic style. So to come up with idea to get the children to eat, it can be a challenge. My daughter was picky eater, she didn’t like cook food etc… which led me to a raw vegan diet. I am not saying to turn your child in to a vegan but here is what i suggest. Get him into eating fresh fruits as much as possible. You get all the essential amino acid and they are easy to digest. If he wants only banana, then just stick to this. Children don’t like to mix stuff. A child is naturally incline to eat fruits, so let him eat this. My child had a blood test done at 4 and all her protein level were above average. So learn to relax with your child. Learn to make smoothie (fruit/hemp seed). Hemp seed has the essential fatty acid and combined with fruits it is pack with vitamin. Goji berries are rich in vitamin A and iron. Sesame seed are pack with calcium.

What i am saying, is while you are helping your child to eat more a variety of food, you won’t have to worry too much if he gets enough nutrient by incorporating fresh fruit and smoothie.

Idea to make it appealing, is to make it supper pretty on his plate.

My daughter only started last year to accept more mix food. She could eat pear all day. You have no idea how it was stressful for me but then i finally got that the children has a natural instinct of the food they need (not talking about children that are used to over stimulated food with sugar and salt), but the one that start eating, they will be keen on fruits.

Try not to force him, but he will observe you and he will get curious about the food and he will want to try it. I gave up about my daughter and on her own now, she asks to taste what we eat.
 
I can understand your problems. my 3 year old has just started this phase.some days he gobbles down his food others he doesn’t. it can get annoying some days but its a matter of staying calm and not letting them wind you up.

God Bless.

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I have a two year old son who is super picky about what he eats. Tonight we had smoked ribs and chicke, roasted asparagus, beans, and I have the kids a strawberry. He don’t touch any of it. This happens regularly at meals unless its something like noodles or Mac and cheese. He eats like a bird when he does eat. 2-3 bites and he’s done. We don’t do a lot of snacking. Experienced parents out there have some advice? I’ve got a 10 month old and another one on the way. Would like to get good habits going now. Not willing to be a short order cook for everyone.
“Grazing” is normal for kids at this age, so do offer snacks in between meals. Scheduled morning and afternoon snacks are a great way to ensure they get enough to eat. Also, keep in mind that their pickiness is due to the fact that their taste buds are still developing; some foods just don’t taste good for them. They will grow out of it, so be patient. My one rule at mealtime was they had to have a source of protein. I stopped trying to coerce them to try things (fastest path to frustration I found). I read somewhere that doing this can actually create adult picky eaters. By age 5-6, they were naturally more adventurous; this coincided with more mature taste buds.
 
At all ages, the sight of far more food than you are hungry for will kill what appetite you have. It seems counter-intuitive, but give him far less food and fewer choices at a time that you have. Start with just a few bites of just one thing, and let him ask for more.

I would make it a condition to get more choices that he try those that he has: that is, that he literally just touch the food in front of him to his tongue, not that you force him to eat it. That will get it under his nose, so he’ll at least have smelled it. Then set him up for success by not giving him a particular food again for awhile when he’s tried it three different times and refused it every time. When he’s been let off the hook for awhile, when you introduce it again, remind him that you’ve been doing your part by letting him bypass it for a long time, and it is again his turn to try it for you, because he needs to learn to be nice to the cook’s feelings.

If you don’t see signs of failure to thrive, I wouldn’t worry about his small amounts of food, although I would mention it to his doctor at well-child check-ups. If you think he’s not growing properly or doesn’t look healthy, though, call his pediatrician. Sometimes loss of appetite comes from more than a picky attitude, even when it happens to 3 year olds. If the child were to have a gluten intolerance or some other unknown food sensitivity, for instance, his constant abdominal distress would ruin his appetite. It is more likely, though, that he is just going through a period when he isn’t growing much and doesn’t want a lot of food.
 
If your son won’t eat smoked ribs, let me know the next time you smoke 'em and i’ll come and eat for him 😉

All kidding aside, set parameter’s now knowing that if your son isn’t going to eat what the rest of the fam is eating, it’s going to be a loooooong time until breakfast, otherwise, you’ll be dealing with this all throughout his childhod.
 
My first though is perhaps he has a food allergy you are unaware of. If that is not the case, this is what my mom did to save a headache. She NEVER told us we had to eat. She told us we had to sit in our place at the table for 10 minutes. It was more part of a routine. She would put a plate of food in front of us and leave it at that. It was NEVER about eating in our minds
 
It is a picky age. But given his preference for smooth, sloppy foods, be aware that he may have a degree of Sensory Processing Disorder.

My daughter has found that her little ones eat a lot more when she puts a variety of foods into a divided snack platter and lets them dig in - the three of them at one end of the table and the adults at the other.

When mine were that age and were showing signs of going head-to-head with their daddy about food, I got a good multivitamin from my pharmacy, told my husband not to worry, as long as they were eating some food and taking the supplement all would be well. After a month or two of still being offered a normal plate of food, they were eating all that was offered without any problems.
 
I have a two year old son who is super picky about what he eats. Tonight we had smoked ribs and chicke, roasted asparagus, beans, and I have the kids a strawberry. He don’t touch any of it. This happens regularly at meals unless its something like noodles or Mac and cheese. He eats like a bird when he does eat. 2-3 bites and he’s done. We don’t do a lot of snacking. Experienced parents out there have some advice? I’ve got a 10 month old and another one on the way. Would like to get good habits going now. Not willing to be a short order cook for everyone.
Don’t take this the wrong way, but I would have been really hungry after this meal. Smoked meat? Yuck. I might eat some roasted asparagus, but not enough for a meal. And beans, it would really depend on how you made them. I would have eaten a strawberry. Everyone has different tastes, even children.

When my son was little, he was extremely picky. When I made dinner, I would make sure I made at least one thing he liked. That way he would have enough to eat, even if he didn’t didn’t eat everything. He eventually grew out of being picky. He is a teen but eats lots of different foods including Ahi tuna, lamb and Brussels sprouts. He still won’t eat peas or beans. 🤷
 
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