Understanding better the sexuality within marriage

[Tele]

Thank you very much, this indeed was very helpful!
Thanks Emily and all the others!

 

[PaulGH]

Thanks you all for your answers.
In what concerns what I put in bold, I don’t know if I agree with that. You say that each sex act must be ordered towards procreation. Then, I am asking myself, why do we use our infertile days if our purpose must be to procreate?
Please do not send me all of you towards the Cathechism, I have indeed read it but it;s because some things are not so clear to me that I came here with my answers.
I mean, our purpose is not to procreate, this is what we want when we use these periods, so inside us we should still be open to make a baby, is that what you wanted to say?

I think the problem is that you had been assuming that “ordered toward procreation” means the same thing as “our purpose must be to procreate.” But these two phrases do not have the same meaning. As Em_in_FL explained, “ordered toward procreation” simply means that the act is the type of act that could result in procreation, depending on the woman’s fertility (or the man’s fertility, if there are medical issues there). So marital relations that take place when the wife is infertile still could be “ordered toward procreation,” if the act is performed in a way that does not exclude procreation. (For example, masturbation and homosexual relations are never ordered toward procreation, even if a woman is involved and she is fertile at the time.)

About the term ‘masturbation’ I understand it very well… when I used it I had in mind the very common case when(sorry for being direct) the husband and wife have not an orgasm in the same time. So that sexual act whoulld it be wrong only because it was not a ‘complete sexual act’? or complete refers only to what the man is doing? Sorry again for the language, but I try to put it as clear as possible.
Thanks again

The key to the act being “ordered toward procreation” is that the husband’s climax must occur in a way that is potentially life-giving. It is certainly not necessary for both the husband and the wife to climax at exactly the same time as each other. However, husbands obviously should be very attentive to their wives’ needs as well; if he climaxes first, he can and should attend to his wife so that she is not left out.