I have had sleep paralysis - or the feeling of being awake while asleep and sometimes being visited by something/someone. I was diagnosed with a physical problem in my nose (I got it from my dad) and now use a CPAP machine. The weird part is - I still have experienced the phenomenon of someone/something, dark, who visits me while I am using the machine - or not. It should have stopped if it were a physical thing. I don’t like it because it is an overbearing darkness that comes over me - almost suffocating. If it is physical or a real ‘ghost’ - I don’t know. I just experience it every so often.
So, what is it? I don’t know but I am not afraid of it anymore and just tell it to get the crud out of here!
When I was in my middle twenties, I saw my boyfriend, who had died two days previous, when I went to stay at his friends house just before the funeral. Geez, that one really got to me too. At first I was just talking to him and we were ok, then all of a sudden I realized that he was dead and I freaked out. He looked at me with sad eyes and said, ‘but I thought you liked this sort of thing?’. I couldn’t stop crying. After that I only saw him in my dreams.
I have had dreams that told me of things to come. In fact, one of the dreams told me that my boyfriend would die. I usually have them repeatedly until they occur and then they stop.
Another dream was weird - it had two caskets with the son’s casket before the father’s casket. I freaked out. Ok, my dad was dying so I thought the son in the dream was one of my brothers. I was overcome with grief and sadness to think that one of my brothers would die. But then my dad died and nothing happened to my brothers. I kept having the dream though and just thought is was a reoccurring dream - and then my grandfather died. He died suddenly. The ‘father’ was my grandfather, who we all loved more than words can explain, and the ‘son’ was my dad who was dying of a long illness - cancer. When grandpa died that was the end of the dreams.
I have been in houses where I know that something is not totally right too. They sort of creep me out and I don’t stay very long and don’t revisit them. One house is my cousin’s house. She is such an addict on prescription drugs that I think she might be the problem, or ‘let in’ a problem!
And the last dream I ever had in this regard - I kept having dreams of vehicles crashing and then I would wake up. It was different vehicles with different colors always hitting each other and I would wake up hearing a loud bang. It didn’t go away until after I had a head on collision in Ireland. It was like slow motion and this was the dream in real life! And it ended with a big BANG!
One thing that has always bothered me was when I was really tired and I sat down in a chair and just ‘vegged out’. A large ‘opening’ appeared and it sounded like the ocean and a voice said, ‘come here’. I not only said, “NO!”. My head felt like it banged shut and I had a headache afterwards. No, I wasn’t, or am not, on drugs! But that has never happened again and I always wonder who the voice belonged to.
I know I have a guardian angel too. In fact, I know when it is leading me. I know when it is disappointed in me too.
Anyway, this website sort of let me write things that I haven’t told anyone. I guess being anonymous sort of helped too.