W
whatevergirl
Guest
Per my pm’s to you Iris–I think you are wise to just pray about it all, and give it some time. Absolutely gear up with a lawyer, but as a dear friend told me years ago…‘when in doubt, do nothing.’There is another thing too. My husband recently lost his father. My husband took it really hard because he hadn’t seen his father since he was a small child. So maybe that is one of the reasons he is acting the way he is. I don’t know.
Now, your husband turning to another woman, it could just be that he has difficulty with commitment, etc…I also had a similiar problem in my marriage (fear of commitment) largely due to my own childhood. However, that being said–your husband can’t expect the problems he has to go away through cheating…through lying. No way do I advocate his terrible behavior, but people usually act badly, in marriages as well, because they have unresolved childhood problems. His cheating is a symptom of a much larger problem than marriage–most likely, he wasn’t ready for marriage, and thus, is acting out in a way most unbecoming of a married person. But, I’m no marriage guru, just know that when my husband and I were separated about 8 years ago, I realized that the problems I grappled with came from a childhood I did not want to accept. I looked to my marriage to make me happy–which is what your husband is most likely doing. Again, what he has chosen to do with his childhood problems is WRONG. But, this can give you some insight into the ‘why’ of this.
Unfortunately, at this point, a whole different set of problems has emerged from his infidelity, and I sadly think that he will realize the err of his ways, too late. Sin doesn’t appear as sin at first. It looks like comfort, but eventually, we realize it was sin.
Anyways…I pray for you Iris! You will emerge quite strong from all of this…and where this road will lead, just know God walks it with you. I will be thinking of you tonight at church. (((hugs)))
And you are most welcome Iris–I’m always here to listen. (well, read lol)
