Unkind confessor

[palmas85]

I suppose I’m not the only one this has happened to, but I went to Confession for Christmas, and the priest was most impatient and had not a kind word at all. I know what I did was wrong, but that’s why I was there. How does one handle this? I suppose he may have been having a bad day as we all do. I just have a sense that I am not really forgiven since he certainly didn’t seem to even tho he gave absolution.

I’ll let you in on something. The Priest is under no obligation to absolve you at all. He doesn’t have to. If he doesn’t feel that you are truly contrite, he can withold it. Very rare, but it does happen. Also, whatever you did he may have taken offense to. They are not supposed to do that but being human sometimes they will. Maybe he was having a bad day, or had a toothache or lost a bundle a the track or is just a jerk.
A while back, I had gotten involved with a woman, nice lady, Methodist but she hated Catholicism and made it known to me that if I ever expected anything serious with her that I would not practice Catholicism. In the heat of the moment, I told her that wouldn’t be a problem:bigyikes:
**
Mortal Sin**

I confessed this to the Priest. His words to me,

“You did huh, you should have told her to go straight to Hell because that is where you’ll be going and you won’t want to be alone.” He proceeded to chew me out for at least five minutes and pointedly asked me if I was truly sorry, if I was still involved with the woman, if I still spoke to her, etc etc. He raked me over the coals. I felt like a dog. Nothing nice about it at all.

But he was right. It took me a while to realiize that, but he was 100% right.

 

[Joan_M]

Is it true that some people say

" Bless me Father for I have sinned ".

If this is true, then if one has not sinned, it becomes

" Condemn me Father for I have NOT sinned ".

What also puzzles me, is how anyone can live with even having committed just one sin. I sure couldn’t !

So, then, Soundtruth, are you seriously implying that you have never sinned? If you are, then, you just committed one - a lie, for we have all sinned.

 

[Brendan]

I confessed something to a priest and got this in response:

“Well THAT was a STUPID thing to do”

And he was 100% right

Installing a little humility in us in a good thing for pastors to do

 

[marci]

I think that annonymous confession in the screened confessional is the way to go. When you confess your sins, you must remember that it is Christ that you are confessing to. No matter what the condition of the priest (ie, alcoholic, rude, in a state of mortal sin), doesn’t lesson the sacrament.

If you have given a good confession (examination of conscience, truely sorry with true conviction to try and turn away from sin), you are forgiven.

Also, absolution may be conditional based apon the penitent’s willingness to perform some act such as restitution. For example, if you have stolen money from someone, you may be told to pay it back, if that cannot be done, you may be asked to give money to the homeless, etc.

Denying yourself the sacrament because of the priests kindness, or lack thereof, is tantamont to not going to mass because you don’t like the priests homilies.

Sometimes its hard to see past the human sinful nature that exists in all of us, including priests, but that human frailty does not diminish the power of the priest to administer the sacraments.

In other words, do not let your heart be troubled, trust in the Mercy of Jesus.

 

[Thursday1]

Just some advice I have received from my Spiritual Director:
If you are ever being treated incredibly badly by a priest in confession (My spiritual director has been before), get up, tell the priest that you know you are not receiving absolution and that you are going to find another priest for confession, and that if you should die before you get there, your sins are on his shoulders. Actually, the story he related where he did this involved some coarser language, but you get the idea. He says some priests just don’t get that they are doing more harm than good, and need a wake up call. I haven’t had to use this advice yet, but I know some people who have had to.

Yours in Christ,
Thursday

 

[tamccrackine]

I confessed something to a priest and got this in response:

“Well THAT was a STUPID thing to do”

And he was 100% right

Installing a little humility in us in a good thing for pastors to do

I nearly died laughing when I read this… I’ve had this happen and I’ve even had a priest, one which I finally found the guts to go to for Confession, tell me “So, have you confessed this sin before?” and I said yes. He asked “how many times do you keep bringing it back? Is this just once you’ve done it and don’t feel forgiven or do you keep doing it?” and I answered honestly and he goes “You don’t keep sinning because it’s something cool to do, you’ve got a habit in which you need to break and you know, go to counseling now.”

I’ve also had a priest rake me over the coals and as humiliating as it was, it was, in the sense of the word, humbling. Brought my ego back down yet made me feel so much better.

I’m sorry to the OP for her feelings and I hope things have gotten better since. I wouldn’t worry about the priest, maybe he was having a bad day and the previous penitent was in there and irritated him for some reason.

 

[palmas85]

Is it true that some people say

" Bless me Father for I have sinned ".

If this is true, then if one has not sinned, it becomes

" Condemn me Father for I have NOT sinned ".

What also puzzles me, is how anyone can live with even having committed just one sin. I sure couldn’t !

Really, I was under the impression that all men sinned. Except One.

I would tend to doubt that you are Him, even if you think that you are.

 

[BlyssfulDreamer]

I would just like to have a confessor who takes in what I am saying. Instead of just listening and giving the absolution. It was like*…“Did you hear what I said.?” *Of course, it might have been the fact that it was the Christmad confession schedule and he might have been tired after 11/2 hours of listening…so…

:heart:Blyss