Unkindness is shaking my faith

  • Thread starter Thread starter Maragal
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
M

Maragal

Guest
Im really struggling with this. Everywhere I go - nasty comments, sarcasm, downright hatred spewed - by those calling themselves Catholics and Christians. Those on the right, those on the left. Those who support Trump, those who dont.

Im also shaken by folks who call themselves Catholics and dont give a darn about the poor or vulnerable. People taking the Sacraments then being nasty about he homeless on their streets.

Do I just need to accept that we all struggle with sin - and for some people their sin is sarcasm and nastiness - for others, no compassion? Lord knows, Im a sinner. So maybe I need to look at it in that way…Ive got a LONG way to go…

But sometimes - observing comments on social media - I think how can the faith possibly be true if its done nothing to soften our hearts, and we are just as nasty to each other as anyone else. Its as if we have never seen the words “love your enemies”.

I just needed to vent this! Thanks for listening…
 
Last edited:
I think you need to take a big step back from social media and anywhere else you encounter these arguments. Cut all negativity out your life, it’s not worth it.
 
This is completely understandable and, I know it’s hard, but you have to choose not to let those comments bother you. I’m a highly sensitive person and I get offended too easily, so I understand. In fact, you can even use it as an opportunity to stand up for what’s right and defend The Catholic Church. You may even gain some converts in the process. 🙂 We need to pray for those people who say bad things about The Catholic Church, so that they may embrace the true religion. I hope this helps!!! God bless!!! 🙂
 
The MSM is downright toxic. Social media is only slightly different because it’s not totally controlled but it’s open to the public.

Aside from that, I think that people IRL are generally more kind than they used to be. I can remember adults and children being mean in a way that I just don’t see anymore. I’m sure it has to do with the proliferation of ideas like equality, tolerance etc. But not just that, in the last 50 years discoveries in the fields of neuroscience, psychology, sociology etc. have changed the way we teach children, treat addicts, accept minorities, etc.

So there’s a case to be made either way. YMMV
 
Last edited:
Surround yourself with people who you want to be around. Volunteer and you will be around people with similar values to you, in that realm. Don’t focus so much on their religion. You will find you are more alike than you are different.
 
Take control of your social media. I stopped "following"those with toxic or crude/rude comments. It’s makes my facebook a nicer place to visit.
 
I really sympathize. I thought that joining CAF would be good for my faith, but I am thinking about leaving it because I find that my faith is being undermined every time I come on here.

For example, just the other day, somebody posted a comment saying that we should give the homeless cannabis and that they don’t want to get jobs. I found myself wondering whether this is actually a Catholic website. It just seems like such a heartless, unfeeling thing to say. I was really upset to think that somebody who is a Catholic would come on a Catholic website to comment that homeless people are workshy potheads. It showed such a lack of understanding for the reasons why people become homeless, what it’s like being homeless, and what we can do to help the homeless.

Or there was another thread where racism came up and somebody posted that the idea of racism was invented by Trotsky in 1927. This is completely untrue. The idea of racism was being discussed by French thinkers in the 19th century and the word first appears in the English language in 1902. The ridiculous idea that Trotsky invented the idea of racism is just something racists say on the internet (and sometimes off the internet) to make out that racism isn’t something we should be talking about and that people who do talk about it must be communists.

I had a ridiculous argument with a woman on here who was saying that if you let your children go to school instead of homeschooling them then you are giving them up to somebody else (usually the state) to be raised instead of raising your own children. I had clashed with the same woman on another thread where she was posting untrue things about the Confederacy and the Civil War. I looked back through her posting history and there was another thread where she was saying that there is a particular race (she wouldn’t say what race) that her husband doesn’t employ in his business and that she supports him because they know that this particular race doesn’t make good employees. Again, I couldn’t believe reading openly racist posts by someone who is a Catholic.

And then there’s things like, while I completely understand the Church’s position on homosexuality, there is no need at all to label gay people “sodomites” and “alphabet people”.

So, yeah, that’s just my experience. I am finding that interacting with other Catholics online is just exposing me to all sorts of stuff that makes me question my place in the Church.
 
Listen, it’s not worth losing your faith over. To extent that you can separate yourself from harmful social interactions, please do so.

Having said that… remember the church is made up of sinners. There are sexists, racists, homophobes, liars, cheaters, thieves, rapists, and murders in this same church. The Body of Christ is made up of flawed and fallen human beings just struggling and trying to be perfect as God is perfect. God’s mercy is available as much to the bigot as it is to the saint. He is calling us all to Himself, and calling us all to repentance and conversion, however long it takes.

So, instead of allowing the reality of our fallen nature to get you down, pray for your brothers and sisters who are sinners just like you are, and try to love them as best you can. That’s what we are called to do.
 
Last edited:
mrsdizzyd said:
Having said that… remember the church is made up of sinners. There are sexists, racists, homophobes, liars, cheaters, thieves, rapists, and murders in this same church. The Body of Christ is made up of flawed and fallen human beings just struggling and trying to be perfect as God is perfect. God’s mercy is available as much to the bigot as it is to the saint.
Click to expand...
This is a really good point.
For many people including myself, the hardest part about being a Catholic, or even a Christian generally, is NOT the relationship with Jesus or the loving Father God. That part is pretty easy. Jesus loves me and doesn’t do anything to annoy me.

Rather, the hardest part is putting up with other people, including the many who identify as Catholic or Christian. I always feel like John Lennon when he said that Jesus was all right but his disciples were “thick” and ruined religion for him. It’s easy to love Jesus dying on the cross for me personally, much harder to see and love Jesus in a person who is saying, doing or posting something that makes me frustrated or angry. We’re called to see Jesus in everybody, including the serial killer, the guy who screamed at me for 10 minutes because I took a parking spot he was hoping to occupy, and the person who posts viewpoints that I vehemently disagree with. Jesus loves all these people just as much as he loves me, though he doesn’t love all the stuff that they do - or that I do.

If you find that some activity is making it harder for you to see Jesus in people, like your frustration at what they post is so great that you find yourself upset about it regularly, then it is time to take a big step away.
 
Last edited:
Thank you everybody for your wonderful feedback…its helped me just to vent lol!

Poster who recommended doing volunteer work with kind folks - yes - I do belong to a Catholic Worker group, and they are gentle, beautiful people…I need to do more with them.

Poster who mentioned those who condemn the catholic faith - yes, Ive seen that unkindness…but also, Im sorry to say, unkindness between Catholics.

Poster who said maybe we are actually kinder now than in the past- very interesting! Need to think about that…I suppose human nature doesnt change and there have always been all types…

Those commenting on loving sinners - I guess thats what it comes down to, and remembering I, too, am a sinner. I think for me the biggest “angst” is hearing Catholics say “its ok for me to be nasty in this situation”…Im on a facebook forum dedicated to the little flower…a debate broke out about Trump…and there were Catholics from EVERY end of the spectrum…from trad right to socialist left - justifying their own nastiness, while claiming to be MORE faithful than the other side. Politics matters…and I feel very strongly about my views…but it “stumps” me that both sides have seemingly lost the idea of “love your enemy”…what happened to that??? But I guess I need to put it down to human sin.

The folks recommending avoiding social media - yes! Or sticking to sites where kindness prevails.

Really appreciate all of your thoughts - smiling at tisbear saying its not loving Jesus thats hard…its loving each other! And mrsdizzyd, thank you, you are right, its not worth losing my faith over!
 
Last edited:
See Jesus in everyone you interact with. Jesus loves everyone 🙂
 
My honest opinion is that this must be from social media. People are generally well-mannered in real life but too much social media time can be pretty rough. I would just find some time in a more positive environment for awhile. All of us need encouragement from time to time.
 
You have 2 choices.
  1. Stop or decrease your use of social media.
  2. Form a habit of praying for each of these people the moment you read their awful comments.
 
This weekend we will be reminded of our duty to be salt and light.

When you face hatred, show
Demonstrate radical love.

When you hear hate, be the example of peace.

Do turn away from partisan politics and commercial op Ed that is marketed as news. Try turning off all news, even thingd like Church Millitant or Natl Catholic Reporter for Lent.

Vatican website news will keep you informed without shaking your peace.
 
Thank you all so much…disorienting sneeze YES I can do both! Stay off social media where people are unkind…but when I run into it…pray for the folks…thank you for that reminder to pray - to pray for all!

Thelittlelady - yes, salt and light…!

Blessings to all
 
You have described how I feel. Please know you are not alone. There is a lot of hate in this world coming from all directions. Sometimes I cry in solitude, at the ugliness I see all around, from Christians everywhere. All you can do is to spread the gospel, without words, and leave things in God’s hands. Draw the line on some subjects, and move on in silent prayer.
I live in a small town in the Midwest, the ugliness here is tangible. Catholics here are mocked constantly, and if you are a “true” Christian you HAVE to be a Republican, and never disagree with the president.
The Divine Mercy prayer centers me. It helps me practice silence in the midst of chaos.
If I can give any good advice to anyone, is that you abstain from social media as much as possible. There is a lot of Ugly camps on YouTube and Facebook that cause confusion for us. In fact, giving up social media might be a good Lent practice. Stay close to Jesus’s teachings, if anyone calls you a fool for doing so, think of Him and what he had to go through for us… shake the dust off your sandals, and move on shinning your light. May God bless you, guard you, and make haste to you in times of doubt. Stay strong dear one, the storm is fierce, but Jesus is our Captain, we will not perish.
Peace be with you always.
 
I think we are all obliged to avoid situations where we feel our faith is being shaken, if we can help it. Do those things that strengthen your faith, and stay away from those things that shake it. As St. Paul tells us, our minds need to be transformed by thinking about whatever is lovely, pure, true, good. That’s not to live in la-la land, but to take definite steps when something is pulling you down from a loving and active faith. Social media is not only a huge time waster but has definitely been correlated with depression, anxiety, etc.
 
Free speech is under attack here and elsewhere.
News and various media is the weapon used to attack free speech. Spewing hate and falsehoods is the cutting edge used to degrade that freedom. In the end, those who live by the sword will die by the sword.
The First Amendment of the Constitution of the United States protects several basic freedoms in the United States including freedom of religion, freedom of speech, freedom of the press, the right to assemble, and the right to petition the government. It was part of the Bill of Rights that was added to the Constitution on December 15, 1791.
Click to expand...
If reading media of any kind is getting to you…step back but ask God for discernment when and if you resume.
 
Last edited:
The comments are interesting, however, nothing can shake my Faith! I too realize there is an increase of unkindness in the world…hate…racism…violence…etc. Sometimes I feel like I am from another planet…I use to be a Facebook member, but could not read anymore of the hate and anger! So, I deleted my account…I am currently reading a good book called “Manual for Spiritual Warfare” by Paul Thigpen. It focuses on the struggles with the Devil. I highly recommend it. Prayer is so powerful!
 
Maragal said:
I just needed to vent this! Thanks for listening…
Click to expand...
The ultimate purpose of our faith is to bring us to the point where we love God with our whole heart, soul, mind, and strength and our neighbor as ourselves. That love constitutes our justice, our wholeness-and is possible to the extent that we are in communion with God, a communion that man was made for, and that we’re lost without.

But it has nothing directly to do with what we say or the vestments we wear or which Church membership we claim. It has to do with our heart, with that love. And the Church teaches that at the end of the day we’ll be judged on our love. We need to examine ourselves by this standard rather than looking right or left at other people very much. And if people don’t love as well as they should that really only proves that the Church’s teachings on Original Sin and concupiscence are right.

It’s a struggle, a “journey towards perfection” as the Church also teaches. Some are more willing to look deeply at them themselves while others are not; we all like to think we’ve already arrived, that we’re already right-and that’s an obstacle, based on pride, and pride tends to elevate the self while opposing love. It’s the primary obstacle to true holiness. Anyway, I like a statement of St Augustine’s, “The perfection of a man is to come to know his imperfections.” And as I said, we may or may not be willing to look.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top