Unknown Addiction Still Considered Sacramental Marriage?

[GospelOfMatthew]

find out about how pornography can actually change brain function and how difficult, but far from impossible, it is to work “against your brain” to overcome addiction.

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Amazing points by @Therese1998. It is so sad that in order for us to fight this horrible sin, most of us have to struggle through it first, either as the one doing it or the one watching a significant other struggling. It is very sad. But when we are in the deepest of pits, Jesus is there to throw down the ladder, all we have to do is climb!

 

[Gorgias]

As for divorcing, no, I do NOT NOT NOTTT want to divorce my husband. That is a last resort if multiple priests, and other people who understand the annulment process tell me otherwise. I want to have peace of mind just making sure I have a pure marriage in the eyes of God.

A priest or a canon lawyer won’t tell you “yes, go ahead and divorce him.” You’re married (and we’ll make the reasonable presumption that the marriage was according to Catholic form and celebrated in the Church). That means that, since marriage enjoys the favor of the law, therefore the Church considers you validly married. In other words, you’re in a sacramental marriage. All other things being equal, and presuming that there’s not more to the story that you told the nun than you explained here, then she’s wrong to suggest that it’s not a sacramental marriage. Period.

The question you’re asking is a different one, and @1ke has addressed it well. If you were already divorced, and if you were questioning the validity of the marriage at that point, then maybe a canon lawyer or tribunal might advise you on the question of the consent present at the time of your wedding. At that point, if you decided to pursue a declaration of nullity, then you would receive a ruling. However – and this is important – the Church never offers opinions on the validity of a marriage to folks who are still married and presumed to be in a valid marriage.

You have a valid sacramental marriage in the eyes of God. Now the question for you is how you two move forward. Like others have suggested, you really do need to find a good priest with whom you can discuss the issues you’re facing!

 

[DeoGratias19]

Hi,
I’m sorry to hear of your difficulty with your husband. It sounds like he knows there is a problem, and you are seeking some spiritual guidance and help. I will simply agree with the above posters that you need not worry about your marriage; it is valid. You are both sinners, but you have a sacrament. I feel those thoughts and temptations about invalidity are from the evil one, who wants you to feel justified in considering divorcing and seeking greener pastures should your husband not overcome this addiction in a way that is satisfactory to you. Instead, when you have those thoughts about invalidity, pray the rosary or go to adoration chapel. Try to make some sacrifices for your husband as an offering or spiritual bouquet of sorts to assist in his overcoming this addiction. Satan will hate it, but Our Lady and Our Lord will likely increase the graces of your sacrament. If you feel hurt or betrayed by his viewing of porn, take your hurt and pour out your heart to Christ, who was also betrayed and hurt by His own disciples. And your husband may benefit from listening to Fr. Isaac Mary Reylea on his mission on hell. Sometimes we need something shocking or terrifying to help really motivate us out of an “addiction” . I tried to link it but CA will not allow it.

Also, do not think of divorce as a last resort. We would do well to refresh ourselves with the “harsher” teaching of the early Church Fathers. Marriage is until death do us part. I had a great longer quote from St. Jerome, but the CA Forum will not let me post it.

God bless