Upon adopting children not dogs and cats

[WilT]

The Holy Father suggested to married couples if they are sterile and cannot have children of their own, to adopt children rather than adopting pets. Fair enough Holy Father!

 

[simpleas]

Yes, but its much easier to adopt pets than children.

 

[WilT]

but we have lot’s of wonderful adoptable children out there!

 

[MJJean]

It’s not like it’s an either-or thing. I have 3 kids, 4 dogs, a cat, a tortoise, and a parrot. We can have kids and dogs/cats.

 

[heidi_storage]

but we have lot’s of wonderful adoptable children out there!

Irrelevant. Pets aren’t children; children aren’t pets. You have very different responsibilities and expectations for dogs than for humans.

 

[WilT]

You got a point MJ Jean, but I believe he may be worried about those who go overboard such as dressing up their animals to look like human subjects; spiderman, Darth Vader, princess’, and so on. Do you dress up your animals? your parrots?

 

[SecretGarden]

The reason why he is saying that is because some people go a little crazy when it comes to adopting pets such as dressing them up as children etc. Although I think some people go a little extremes in some respects when it comes to adopting animals to be fair on both, I think we should adopt both because there are millions of children and animals needing loving homes. About eighty some odd years ago, my great grandmother adopted my grandmother as a toddler and thanks to her love, both my mother and I are here. Adoption works and it is a gift for the parents, the children and the future generations.

 

[crenfro]

Hello.

My husband refuses to adopt children. We are a middle-aged married couple. I’ve asked him but he won’t.

Any suggestions for this situation?

Please pray for me.

 

[tabycat]

Yes, but its much easier to adopt pets than children.

But, the pets are less likely to leave you, even when the pets are the children’s and the children leave home.

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

HH said much more than that!
zenit.org/en/articles/pope-s-morning-homily-marriage-should-reflect-christ-s-fruitful-love-for-his-church

Including a scolding for contracepting or sterilizing couples and a defense of Traditional marriage.

Where is the Secular media? This does not fit their agenda?

 

[WilT]

Crenfo, I feel your concern. I’m sorry to hear that. My best guess would be to find out exactly the one thing or reason for him not liking adoption. Do your best to convince him otherwise. My guess, without knowing your husband, has to do with pride, arrogance, and selfishness. All very hard to get rid of unless he is a Christian then prayer will be your strength. Good Luck. Our prayers will be with you.

 

[GEddie]

You got a point MJ Jean, but I believe he may be worried about those who go overboard such as dressing up their animals to look like human subjects; spiderman, Darth Vader, princess’, and so on. Do you dress up your animals? your parrots?

I love my dog, but I would never do that.

Animals are free of having to wear clothes. Why burden them with such?

ICXC NIKA

 

[InspiritCarol]

Hello.

My husband refuses to adopt children. We are a middle-aged married couple. I’ve asked him but he won’t.

Any suggestions for this situation?

Please pray for me.

Sure. I’ll pray for you, but without a reason from him, it is hard to give advice.
Has he said why not?

I’m not sure if it will help or not, but I’ll share my own experience.

My husband is a convert and was brought up under the strict doctrine of only having children when “you’re ready” and then, even two is way too many.

I didn’t know how to express the pain of I felt in my heart when he insisted on “waiting”. So, instinctively, I just kept bringing home stray animals that no-one wanted: a dog, a rabbit, some mice … I just kept showing up with them. At first he was super mad at me for making unilateral decisions. I told him I understood his anger, so I just would let him know about all the animals I didn’t bring home that day.

I’d like to say that I convinced him with words or deeds, but I guess, he just kind of “got it” on his own. You see, there was none of me saying: give me kids or I’ll bring more animals. No negotiations. Only my raw needs displayed.

Finally he gave me specific guidelines of what he needed to feel he was ready and, needless to say, I worked overtime to make those things happen.

In retrospect, both of us regret waiting to start and are doing our best to make up for lost time (~ 5 years). I’m sure if we had not been able to conceive, it would have been the same regarding adoption.

Find out what hoops you need to jump through for your husband, and get to work.

 

[thewanderer]

Yes, but its much easier to adopt pets than children.

Perhaps, but its not nearly as hard to adopt in the US as many people think.

adoptuskids.org/for-families/how-to-adopt/common-myths-about-adoption#no-orphans

 

[PHILTHEO]

"Hello.

My husband refuses to adopt children. We are a middle-aged married couple. I’ve asked him but he won’t.

Any suggestions for this situation?

Please pray for me."

Have you asked him why? A couple of people here are kind of knocking the guy without any knowledge of him, but to a lot of people biological children mean a lot. To many there simply is not a substitute for bringing new life into the world themselves. If that is his view he might be unconvince-able.

 

[severus68]

The Holy Father suggested to married couples if they are sterile and cannot have children of their own, to adopt children rather than adopting pets. Fair enough Holy Father!

We can adopt children even if we can have children of our own. Plenty of children needing homes.

 

[thewanderer]

We can adopt children even if we can have children of our own. Plenty of children needing homes.

 

[severus68]

It’s not like it’s an either-or thing. I have 3 kids, 4 dogs, a cat, a tortoise, and a parrot. We can have kids and dogs/cats.

Definitely!

 

[Lorelei12]

The Holy Father suggested to married couples if they are sterile and cannot have children of their own, to adopt children rather than adopting pets. Fair enough Holy Father!

Actually, he discussed pets in the context of a couple who are “sterile by choice”, not involuntarily:

There are also other things that Jesus does not like – such as marriages that are sterile by choice, ones in which the spouses “do not want children” or "want to remain without fertility.

"This culture of well-being from ten years ago convinced us: ‘It’s better not to have children! It’s better! You can go explore the world, go on holiday, you can have a villa in the countryside, you can be care-free…it might be better – more comfortable – to have a dog, two cats, and the love goes to the two cats and the dog. Is this true or is this not? Have you seen it? Then, in the end this marriage comes to old age in solitude, with the bitterness of loneliness. It is not fruitful, it does not do what Jesus does with his Church: He makes His Church fruitful.”

I think you are taking his words out of context. The Church does not require that couples who are infertile seek adoption. Holy Father was suggesting that those couples who do not want children in lieu of a carefree, luxurious lifestyle can end up in a bad place. Not that infertile couples “should adopt children rather than pets”.

 

[crenfro]

Crenfo, I feel your concern. I’m sorry to hear that. My best guess would be to find out exactly the one thing or reason for him not liking adoption. Do your best to convince him otherwise. My guess, without knowing your husband, has to do with pride, arrogance, and selfishness. All very hard to get rid of unless he is a Christian then prayer will be your strength. Good Luck. Our prayers will be with you.

Thank you.