Itâs not my place to judge what a priest told you in the sacrament of confession. I understand a priest would be hard pressed to go against a priestâs statement during confession. I remember once hearing a monsignor who was consulted regarding the statement of another priest that was not in accordance with the rules and regulations that he was not going to go against what another priest said so to regularize it. If a Monsignor would not go against a priest, this should tell you something. My advice would be to respect what happened at the confessional and try to learn from it and apply it.
What I will say to you is that thatâs between you and God. Our Lord Jesus is present at the sacrament of confession and confession is serious and it is not a joke and you should have resolve. This clarification need not be labeled as tough love - it is what it is.
I think you may benefit from some quiet time to confront and listen to what the priest told you and see how you can learn and grow from it.
You said that you answered yes to the three question and felt scared about what he would have said if you said no; were you honest? One of the last places I would like to lie is during the Sacrament of Reconciliation. It is serious.
No, a priest is not there to judge you but to forgive if you are repentant.
Well, it sounds like it was high time you got an averse reaction from a priest and you got it.
I think he sounds like a great confessor. He listened to you and honed in on the problem and responded for your benefit not his. I would stick with him.
Itâs not about making you feel good but about forgiving your sins and all the benefits that comes with it.
Why would being set straight at the confession raise thoughts of doubts about the Church? What doubts about what? You want to put things in the correct place and not mix things all together if possible. Why do you feel alone and do you mean as a Catholic in the Church? Maybe you can consider making friends who do share your faith.
My youngest sister left the Church because supposedly there isnât good socializing and there is in the evangelical. The parishes are not social centers and the confessionals are not psychology booths.
I think you have a lot to look into which will help you at the confessional. Try to do the things the priests asked you. Listen and consider very carefully all his comments and try to learn from them. Personally, I would go back to confess with that priest - he sounds like a very good confessor.
Keep in mind that a priest is not there to play nice, his main concern is the eternal salvation of your soul.
Peace.
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âI think he sounds like a great confessor. He listened to you and honed in on the problem and responded for your benefit not his. I would stick with him.â
Thatâs my problem; it really didnât seemed like he listened. He interrupted me mid-sentence and made a judgement of the kind of person I was, which was a person who didnât take confession seriously. And then he had to make sure I was legitimate by asking if I prayed and read Scripture daily (I do, but thinking about it some days I accidentally fall asleep before night prayer and Scripture, so was that lying? I donât know. I donât know if this would be a concern or if Iâm falling back into scrupulous thinking again). There have been other confessions where the priest has stop me during confession when I wasnât expressing something right, and then let me continue. They seemed to listen and honed in on my problem.
It seemed like the priest could tell I was younger (I fully acknowledge that this is probably an unfair judgement on my part), so he felt like I needed a hard lesson.
Regardless of my age, this kind of treatment from older members of the Church is related to the doubt I mentioned earlier. There seems to be an assumption that young people need harsh lessons because, otherwise, theyâll become selfish, entitled, and spoiled. As a younger parishioner, Iâm constantly reminded that faith isnât about âfeeling good,â which I agree with. However, if I find problems in a condemning and intimidating environment, does that automatically demote me to someone desires a fluffy and lenient one?
I grew up proud of my faith and went to confession often. However, my upbringing was also strict and involved frequent reminders that I wasnât humble enough. Not that this happens to everyone, but I became scrupulous and miserable by my early teen years. Instead of loving and serving, I was in constant fear of moral error. This priest didnât âset me straightâ like you said he did earlier. He reminded me of that state of shame and guilt again.
I understand that confessions are not âpsychology booths.â One of my most powerful confessions was when a priest, after his words of advice, advised me to go to seek therapy and counseling. He was basically telling me that confession is for sins, not a conversation about all my problems. However, he didnât berate me for not taking confession seriously. He addressed the issue effectually with compassion.
Iâm being defensive because you mentioned that your sister left the Church because âsupposedly there isnât good socializing and there is in the evangelical.â That is not my reason for feeling disillusioned and confused at times. Reasons to doubt are much more nuanced, and Iâm sure your sisterâs reasons were too.
) But, when I started looking more at my sins of âomissionâ rather than âcommissionâ, I found the whole experience more fruitful. There are so many ways I could have loved my neighbor, but didnât. Itâs a daily struggle. 
He might even ask if youâve been practicing (reading scriptures and saying prayers)?
I was just feeling quirky.