Validity of marriage

[Batfink]

I don’t wish to give too many personal details here, but I know of a woman who had her marriage annulled on the grounds of a medical condition similar to one my husband has (and, like her, I was unaware of the seriousness of the condition on contracting the marriage). I am fully aware that everyone’s case is different and it does not follow that our marriages are in any other way analogous, but still I am slightly concerned.

My question is: what status does someone’s marriage have if they may have grounds for an annullment but don’t want one? I consider myself happily married to my husband, I have no desire to separate from him and I would be very upset to find that we were not really married, but given that were I to apply for a decree of nullity it might well be granted (and I accept that I’ll never know whether it would be or not unless I were actually to go through the process, which, as I’ve said, I don’t want) and that a decree of nullity merely formally states that a valid marriage never existed, is the validity of my marriage in question?

Is there anything I can do now to ratify the marriage and have definitive proof that it is valid, or do I just presume that it is valid since I have no proof to the contrary?

There surely must have been other cases throughout history, e.g. of people who married too young to give informed consent, or possibly who permanently refused to have children. What happens to them if they wish to stay married?

Basically, in my personal case, but also in general, what is the status of a couple the validity of whose marriage may be in doubt but who want to remain (or be) married to one another?

 

[puzzleannie]

I My question is: what status does someone’s marriage have if they may have grounds for an annullment but don’t want one? I consider myself happily married to my husband, I have no desire to separate from him and I would be very upset to find that we were not really married, but given that were I to apply for a decree of nullity it might well be granted (and I accept that I’ll never know whether it would be or not unless I were actually to go through the process, which, as I’ve said, I don’t want) and that a decree of nullity merely formally states that a valid marriage never existed, is the validity of my marriage in question??

the issue of annulment does not come up until the marriage has broken down irretrievably with no hope of reconciliation, until then it is presumed valid. An exception might be a natural law impediment (incest for instance) but I am not a canon lawyer. We recently (DREs) received some instruction from the canonist of the diocese to the effect that if an impediment is later discovered and accepted, the marriage becomes valid. For instance, a man with a drinking problem withholds that information but after marriage the wife of course discovers it, accepts the situation and lives with it for many years. She would have trouble if they later divorced in claiming that condition as grounds for annulment.

As I say, I am no expert in canon law but if you were married according to CAtholic form the issue of validity is not even on the table. Now if someone with an impediment married outside the Church and later sought to convalidate the marriage, the issue might become a problem.

Another example he gave is the couple who marries intending to contracept artificially, but later has a change of heart and accepts the children God sends, the impediment has been removed and should they later divorce, would have trouble using that as a grounds for annulment. As you rightly note, each case is unique. Personally I would not let it trouble you.

 

[ChadS]

I don’t wish to give too many personal details here, but I know of a woman who had her marriage annulled on the grounds of a medical condition similar to one my husband has (and, like her, I was unaware of the seriousness of the condition on contracting the marriage). I am fully aware that everyone’s case is different and it does not follow that our marriages are in any other way analogous, but still I am slightly concerned.

My question is: what status does someone’s marriage have if they may have grounds for an annullment but don’t want one? I consider myself happily married to my husband, I have no desire to separate from him and I would be very upset to find that we were not really married, but given that were I to apply for a decree of nullity it might well be granted (and I accept that I’ll never know whether it would be or not unless I were actually to go through the process, which, as I’ve said, I don’t want) and that a decree of nullity merely formally states that a valid marriage never existed, is the validity of my marriage in question?

Is there anything I can do now to ratify the marriage and have definitive proof that it is valid, or do I just presume that it is valid since I have no proof to the contrary?

There surely must have been other cases throughout history, e.g. of people who married too young to give informed consent, or possibly who permanently refused to have children. What happens to them if they wish to stay married?

Basically, in my personal case, but also in general, what is the status of a couple the validity of whose marriage may be in doubt but who want to remain (or be) married to one another?

Unless there is some other reason, such as a previous unanulled marriage for either partner, the Church will not question the validity of your marriage. The decree of nullity for another couple has no effect on the standing of your marriage either, even if outwardly the situations seem analogous. The Church’s understanding of marriage is that the marriage is valid unless proven otherwise, so that means you don’t have to provide proof after the fact it’s assumed that your vows on the wedding day were sufficient enough to witness to the validity. You’ve stated in your post you aren’t planning on seeking any sort of annulment or divorce so there should be nothing to worry about.

If you and your husband are both Catholic and were married in a church by a priest or deacon using the standard Catholic form there is nothing that needs to be done either. However, if you weren’t you may need to have the marriage convalidated by a priest to square you up with the church, but this process is in no way related to annulments or questioning the validity of the marriage.

I hope this helps put your mind at ease. My opinion isn’t an expert opinion by any means but this seems to be the case from what I understand about annulments and validity with the Catholic Church.

ChadS

 

[cajun2core]

It is my understanding that a marriage is assumed to be valid until it is proven otherwise. Therefore, I believe you can assume your marriage is a valid one. For example, youth does not automatically make a marriage not valid. There have been many people who were married very young and have a valid marriage. For now, assume your marriage is valid and enjoy it.

 

[Phemie]

I don’t wish to give too many personal details here, but I know of a woman who had her marriage annulled on the grounds of a medical condition similar to one my husband has (and, like her, I was unaware of the seriousness of the condition on contracting the marriage). I am fully aware that everyone’s case is different and it does not follow that our marriages are in any other way analogous, but still I am slightly concerned.

My question is: what status does someone’s marriage have if they may have grounds for an annullment but don’t want one? I consider myself happily married to my husband, I have no desire to separate from him and I would be very upset to find that we were not really married, but given that were I to apply for a decree of nullity it might well be granted (and I accept that I’ll never know whether it would be or not unless I were actually to go through the process, which, as I’ve said, I don’t want) and that a decree of nullity merely formally states that a valid marriage never existed, is the validity of my marriage in question?

Is there anything I can do now to ratify the marriage and have definitive proof that it is valid, or do I just presume that it is valid since I have no proof to the contrary?

There surely must have been other cases throughout history, e.g. of people who married too young to give informed consent, or possibly who permanently refused to have children. What happens to them if they wish to stay married?

Basically, in my personal case, but also in general, what is the status of a couple the validity of whose marriage may be in doubt but who want to remain (or be) married to one another?

Whether Catholic and married according to the laws of the Church or non-Catholic and legally married, they are presumed to be validly married.

You don’t know specifically what about the illness caused the Tribunal to declare a null marriage.

It may be that the woman’s marriage was declared null because the husband knew he had the illness, didn’t reveal it and she couldn’t give informed consent. If she wouldn’t have married him if she’d known, then it was null due to lack of consent.

You, OTOH, want to remain married in spite of the illness. Consent is present.

It may be that in the judgment the Tribunal found that in the other case the person’s illness left him mentally unable to enter a marriage. If your husband is being what a husband should be then perhaps, even though he’s got the same condition, he’s not as serious a case as the other man.

If you are really that concerned, you should talk with your pastor.

 

[1ke]

I don’t wish to give too many personal details here, but I know of a woman who had her marriage annulled on the grounds of a medical condition similar to one my husband has (and, like her, I was unaware of the seriousness of the condition on contracting the marriage). I am fully aware that everyone’s case is different and it does not follow that our marriages are in any other way analogous, but still I am slightly concerned.

Methinks you do not have the whole story. And in a decree of nullity situation the whole story is always important.

A medical condition in-and-of itself is neither an impediment to valid marriage nor grounds for nullity (except antecedent perpetual impotence). What **might **be grounds for nullity is the spouse purposely concealing the condition, lieing about it (fraud), etc., to the extent that it compromised the other’s ability to make a freely informed decision.

Your marriage is valid, please be at peace.