Validity of marriage?

[CarrieSpooner]

So from your understanding, if someone who has a legal civil marriage comes back to the church, what happens? What’s the process?

Edit, I also find it interesting how they will accept a non catholic baptism (which is a sacrament?) but they won’t accept a marriage from a non catholic church? (I know we don’t know where she married, this is just a general thought)

The process is having a marriage convalidation. This was a simple and very fast fix. We did not have any prior marriages so we didn’t have to wait for an investigation of previous marriages.

It’s really not that interesting that the Church accepts nonCatholic baptism because the church also accepts nonCatholic marriages. Two nonCatholics can get married and the Church accepts that. The problem comes in when a Catholic person pursues a marriage outside of the Church. The vows they make are not even the same ones required by the Catholic Church. The person has not been prepared for the Sacrament in light of Church teachings. It is quite problematic and makes perfect sense that it must be done in the Church or with a dispensation so that one can be assured of proper form.

 

[Truth_Faith13]

The process is having a marriage convalidation. This was a simple and very fast fix. We did not have any prior marriages so we didn’t have to wait for an investigation of previous marriages.

It’s really not that interesting that the Church accepts nonCatholic baptism because the church also accepts nonCatholic marriages. Two nonCatholics can get married and the Church accepts that. The problem comes in when a Catholic person pursues a marriage outside of the Church. The vows they make are not even the same ones required by the Catholic Church. The person has not been prepared for the Sacrament in light of Church teachings. It is quite problematic and makes perfect sense that it must be done in the Church or with a dispensation so that one can be assured of proper form.

Are there circumstances where the church doesn’t allow convalidation?

Thanks for explaining all this by the way!

 

[CarrieSpooner]

Are there circumstances where the church doesn’t allow convalidation?

Thanks for explaining all this by the way!

The only circumstance I know of where a convalidation is not allowed is when there is a previous valid marriage. This is God’s rule, one that the Church follows. The Church does not make up the rule on it’s own but rather is obedient to God. God says what he puts together in marriage, no man can separate. So if a person had a previous valid marriage, then the Church is unable to make their current legal marriage valid in the eyes of the Church. We can’t blame the Church for this. The “law”, the government, can make a legal contract for marriage with someone who has previously been validly married but the law does not override God. The Church is obedient to God, not the law.

Sometimes people have had previous civil marriages but the Church is able to determine that such marriage was not a valid marriage in the first place. There are a variety of reasons this can happen. In those cases, annulments can be done and the parties can then have a convalidation. Even in the case of the person who comes back to the church, but the nonCatholic spouse refuses to participate in a convalidation, they may be eligible for a radical sanation which will also resolve the problem of the invalid marriage.

During the process, to remain free from sin, both parties must refrain from sex until they are in a valid marriage. This may be what the poster is getting at, not sure? In some cases, the parties must live in separate homes. This is no surprise because you would not want to live in the same home, sleeping in the same bed with someone you are not validly married to according to God. Temptation would be too great. In my case, we were advised to continue living together because we had children in our home and it would cause a scandal to live separately.

I had no problem refraining from sex for a short time until we could have our convalidation. Others choose to continue having sex and these people are still able to have their convalidations. The difference is being in a state of grace or not which means one should not receive the Eucharist when they are not in a state of grace. So for me, I went to confession and was able to receive while waiting for the convalidation.

 

[Truth_Faith13]

Thank you…am I right in thinking the only way a marriage can be sacramental is if both spouses are catholic?

 

[1ke]

Thank you…am I right in thinking the only way a marriage can be sacramental is if both spouses are catholic?

No.

A valid marriage between any two baptized people is a sacrament.

 

[1ke]

See that just makes me cross. Someone who has been married for 30years shouldn’t be broken. For a church that hates divorce, yet it’s willing to break up a legal marriage of 30years! Disgraceful

Based on other posts by this poster, it sounds like some miscommunication has happened somewhere along the line.

The Church is not breaking up a legal marriage. The Church does not require that they separate to convalidate their marriage.

This person has some issues that need to be addressed locally.

 

[1ke]

So from your understanding, if someone who has a legal civil marriage comes back to the church, what happens? What’s the process?

Their marriage can be convalidated through simple convalidation or radical sanation.

, I also find it interesting how they will accept a non catholic baptism (which is a sacrament?) but they won’t accept a marriage from a non catholic church? (I know we don’t know where she married, this is just a general thought)

You are conflating two entirely different things.

The Church accepts both the baptism AND the marriage of non-Catholics, regardless of where they married.

The poster “Casilda” is not a non-Catholic. She is a Catholic who married invalidly. She can convalidate her marriage and it will become valid.

 

[Truth_Faith13]

No.

A valid marriage between any two baptized people is a sacrament.

Can I still become catholic without a marriage which is a sacrament? (My husband isn’t baptised)

 

[1ke]

Can I still become catholic without a marriage which is a sacrament? (My husband isn’t baptised)

Yes.

A marriage involving one or both unbaptized parties is called a natural marriage. it is still a valid marriage and is not an impediment to entering the Church.

 

[lovemyabbie]

I’m feeling similar frustration. My husband finally decided to convert after many years of discussion. He was married once, very young. His ex wife converted many years ago. Apparently she never got an actual annulment, just started the process. I understand that our marriage needs to be blessed in the church, but it’s frustrating that our marriage is the one that is seen as invalid. The RCIA director failed to ask these questions of anyone at the beginning of the process in the fall and now it seems that there are many people who will not be able to complete the process at Easter.

I haven’t always been as faithful as I am not and until recently it hadn’t bothered me that we weren’t married in the church, but it’s weighing heavily on both of us I think. I guess we’ll just have to wait a little longer

 

[Truth_Faith13]

I’m feeling similar frustration. My husband finally decided to convert after many years of discussion. He was married once, very young. His ex wife converted many years ago. Apparently she never got an actual annulment, just started the process. I understand that our marriage needs to be blessed in the church, but it’s frustrating that our marriage is the one that is seen as invalid. The RCIA director failed to ask these questions of anyone at the beginning of the process in the fall and now it seems that there are many people who will not be able to complete the process at Easter.

I haven’t always been as faithful as I am not and until recently it hadn’t bothered me that we weren’t married in the church, but it’s weighing heavily on both of us I think. I guess we’ll just have to wait a little longer

I’m sure it will all turn out ok in the end! I think God is worth the wait

 

[Vico]

Could someone explain why a baptised catholic who married outside the church is not considered validly married and therefore still living in sin?

I could understand why you would prefer a Catholic Church wedding, but why are they considered to be living in sin? By law they would be married?

The natural marriage is described in Genesis 2:18-25. God established all marriage as between one man and one woman and it is exclusive and permanent. If the couple do not create a covenant per that definition of natural marriage, then it is really not a true marriage, so it would not be valid. Considering non-Catholics: sometimes civil marriages are not valid because the couple believes it is not exclusive, or not for the entire life, or does not accept that they come together as one flesh to be fruitful and multiply. It is also possible to be to young or to close of a blood relationship to be valid.

When two baptized are married it is a sacrament, and if consummated, they become one flesh and it is then indissoluble (See: Matthew 19:3-12). (The Church allows dissolution of natural marriages sometimes: Pauline Privilege – natural marriage, and Petrine Privilege (a rare occurrence) – natural marriage with one Catholic.) A Catholic is also bound to marry with approval of the Church for validity. I believe that Tribunals look to see if any non-Catholic marriage they are investigating was acceptable according to the rules of the church or church community were it was celebrated.

 

[EasterJoy]

I’m feeling similar frustration. My husband finally decided to convert after many years of discussion. He was married once, very young. His ex wife converted many years ago. Apparently she never got an actual annulment, just started the process. I understand that our marriage needs to be blessed in the church, but it’s frustrating that our marriage is the one that is seen as invalid. The RCIA director failed to ask these questions of anyone at the beginning of the process in the fall and now it seems that there are many people who will not be able to complete the process at Easter.

I haven’t always been as faithful as I am not and until recently it hadn’t bothered me that we weren’t married in the church, but it’s weighing heavily on both of us I think. I guess we’ll just have to wait a little longer

Two relatives of mine decided to each marry non-Catholics who had previously been married, and the weddings had to wait until the previous attempts at marriage were each found to be invalid.

The unfortunate alternative would be to bless a marriage without doing this checking, only to find that one of the spouses was already in a valid marriage, meaning that the Church had given its blessing to polygamy because it had failed to exercise diligence. It is a difficult situation, but it can hardly be helped.