Veil

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So at mass yesterday, one of the women in the choir had heard I wanted to start veiling! She got me one as a late wedding gift (got married a month ago.) Yay! It was great! And it’s pretty without being too showy. Just a light white lace (our choir robes are white so it looks nice.) It felt so right to do! I’m really lucky I have a supportive group here, at my choir/church, and husband!

Thanks all!
 
So at mass yesterday, one of the women in the choir had heard I wanted to start veiling! She got me one as a late wedding gift (got married a month ago.) Yay! It was great! And it’s pretty without being too showy. Just a light white lace (our choir robes are white so it looks nice.) It felt so right to do! I’m really lucky I have a supportive group here, at my choir/church, and husband!

Thanks all!
Yay! By the way, congratulations on your marriage 🙂 it’s so nice of that lady to give you a mantilla! That’s how I got mine as well 👍 I’m glad to hear that your experience veiling went well.
 
Hey! I’ve been lurking around here but finally got around to creating a login!

I’m curious to women here- do you wear the veil? Why?

I’m interested in starting, but I’m self-conscious about wearing it. A few at my church do and I love it. I partially am intimidated that people will question me about why and I won’t be able to support it well- basically I think it’s beautiful and historically important- symbolic of chastity.

Sorry if this is a repeat of a post- I’m still figuring out how to look through old posts and find what I want.
if i attend a Traditional Latin Mass, i wear the veil. it depends on the norm.
 
“if i attend a Traditional Latin Mass, i wear the veil. it depends on the norm.”

I can see, understand, and even appreciate this. I tend to do most things “b.c of the norm.”

However, I guess I want to know why it is worn and do it for me and for God. Not b/c of “norms.” But I also want to feel it is ok/accepted to wear it when it’s not the norm. I shouldn’t wear the veil b/c others do, but for other reasons (hence my question) since it’s not the norm, but used to be… if this makes any sense.
 
“if i attend a Traditional Latin Mass, i wear the veil. it depends on the norm.”

I can see, understand, and even appreciate this. I tend to do most things “b.c of the norm.”

However, I guess I want to know why it is worn and do it for me and for God. Not b/c of “norms.” But I also want to feel it is ok/accepted to wear it when it’s not the norm. I shouldn’t wear the veil b/c others do, but for other reasons (hence my question) since it’s not the norm, but used to be… if this makes any sense.
I agree about the norm, it is hard to make that distinction. Here in NYC, I see women at OF masses who wear the veil and I see women at EF masses who do not.
 
“if i attend a Traditional Latin Mass, i wear the veil. it depends on the norm.”

I can see, understand, and even appreciate this. I tend to do most things “b.c of the norm.”

However, I guess I want to know why it is worn and do it for me and for God. Not b/c of “norms.” But I also want to feel it is ok/accepted to wear it when it’s not the norm. I shouldn’t wear the veil b/c others do, but for other reasons (hence my question) since it’s not the norm, but used to be… if this makes any sense.
I just highly encourage you to figure out the reason you want to veil. It’s going to be a personal decision and one that you (IMHO) should take seriously. Try your best to refrain from doing things that are “of the norm”…it will make your head covering / or not head covering experience much better.

I cover at all Masses, anywhere, anytime, any day…not just where others do. I am one of few who cover at all at our church.

God bless you on this journey!

Dana
 
Dear Dreamingformore,

You’re going to be nervous for a while if you were a mantilla because it does attract attention. Many people that were born after the 1960’s do not have a good understanding of what the mantilla represents or why people wear them and they tend to think it is quite odd and provincial. Just remember why you are wearing it…to show your inner love and respect for Jesus and His presence - that’s what matters. No one will question you about it, they will just stare at you. The Church doesn’t require women to veil any longer because they want women to want to show their inner love and devotion outwardly by choice. It’s all about our free will to love Christ. No priest or religious will tell you not to wear one, only that you are not required to cover.

As other posts have mentioned, it is a calling. It’s not for everyone and that’s o.k. too. I felt the same way you do when I first started wearing a mantilla. My family and I belong to a conservative church and I’m among a very few that cover. In that group, I’m the only one that covers with a mantilla every week. You get use to the puzzled looks and the stares. Do what you feel is right, because you will come across many people that disagree with your beliefs and the way your live your life to serve Christ - even other Catholics. Don’t let it dissuade you, always make the decision to choose Christ first - above all else and everyone else. Suffering will follow, but it’s still the right choice.
 
Here’s a question for all you. This may sound stupid but remember I come from a generation that didn’t wear hats and gloves…I think I was born after Vatican II (not sure of the year that took place) Why is it that men would not wear hats in church but women did or sometimes do? Everyone in my generation was always told to take hats off out of respect in buildings or school for example. Just curious. :confused:
 
This is in response to TCostello’s latest post:

I fully agree it’s a calling. The majority of the time I wear one not in Church I’ve gotten stares, small smiles from Muslim women who cover, and I even got a small smile from a young lady who didn’t cover. In contrast, I went to a parish I haven’t been to in the city this past weekend, and maybe it was just my imagination but there was an older lady, maybe my mom’s age who sat next to me in my pew. Well, wouldn’t you know it once I tied my headcovering on for Mass she gave me a dirty look I’d say every 10 minutes. And she was dressed quite nice too, but a little artsy. Most people are okay with me covering outside the home, but my mom (and dad by extension) do not like it one bit, and they’re Lutheran (my mom a Lutheran minister of the women’s lib generation). Go figure… You sound very wise, I hope you don’t mind I took your comments (from "Don’t let it dissuade you … ) for my own use and knowledge.

Chantal
 
I"m sorry, I cover my head in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament, but I think the whole idea that “it’s a calling” that some people get is just plain silly. A person may have a calling to the religious life or to be a priest.

Covering your head is not some special thing that some women are specially called to and not others. It is something that St. Paul recommended in the Bible TO ALL WOMEN and the Church at this time leaves it to the discretion of individual women. I have no idea why it should be something that we have to “discern” as if it were a tremendous commitment or a matter of saving our souls. Why do women get in a frenzy about this - one way or the other? You are not risking your salvation if you cover your head. You are not risking your salvation if you don’t cover your head. I hold to the principle of trying to be faithful in the little things, but we have to remember that they *are *little things.

SO JUST DO IT. Or don’t. Whichever.

end of rant
 
Why is it that men would not wear hats in church but women did or sometimes do? Everyone in my generation was always told to take hats off out of respect in buildings or school for example. Just curious. :confused:
Every man praying or prophesying with his head covered, disgraceth his head. But every woman praying or prophesying with her head not covered, disgraceth her head: for it is all one as if she were shaven. -1 Corinthians 11:4-5
Most people are okay with me covering outside the home, but my mom (and dad by extension) do not like it one bit
Same here, my parents forbid from wearing a veil when I go to Mass with them; they don’t want to be “embarrassed” 😦
SO JUST DO IT.
 
After wearing a scarf on a chilly and windy day to my N.O. parish’s Mass, I don’t really have an issue with covering my head in the presence of the Eucharist, but I can’t see myself doing this out of respect for anyone other than Our Lord, nor would I consider doing so. That is far too suggestive of sharia law for my tastes. My sympathies are with our Muslim sisters, for what they suffer because of their faith, but to imitate them in daily life in even this small matter is beyond the pale for this red-blooded American Catholic woman who happened to be in midtown Manhattan on that awful day nine years ago.

And to be honest about it, after some reflection (not agonizing, mind you,) I will probably restrict my head coverings in church to something fairly contemporary like a hat or a scarf that is in keeping with the weather conditions of the day. If I’m clear about what I’m doing and why I’m doing it, I see no need to draw unusual attention to myself by wearing something that would be a very obvious statement.
 
For Sierrah: Around the time of, and before, Vatican II, women in the United States generally wore hats as part of their daily outfit when outside. The etiquette rules of thumb said that hats could be worn inside at social affairs before the dinner hour. Thus, if you were attending a luncheon, or lunch out with your girlfriends, you generally wore a hat in keeping with the season (some sort of straw or fabric for “summer”–after Memorial Day and before Labor Day, and some sort of felt, wool, or fur for “winter”—the rest of the year,) and that coordinated with your outfit. However, if you went to a dinner dance, or an evening event (such as the opera, a charity ball, or something of the sort,) you went bareheaded.

None of this was restricted to Catholic women. It was just the fashion at the time.

Since Mass is usually in the daytime, women who wore hats did so according to the above rules, and I doubt most of them thought it was a religious statement. You usually saw little round chapel veils after hatlessness became fashionable, and usually mantillas were worn by older ladies who were immigrants. At the time, “wash and wear” hair wasn’t common, most women either got their hair done on a weekly basis or did it at home, requiring setting it and spending time under a hair dryer (not blow-drying it like nowadays.) The chapel veils stuck out at odd angles on the bouffant hairstyles of the day and looked silly. Most of the ladies in my mom’s generation were ecstatic to see them go the way of the dodo bird. Scarves were still fairly ubiquitous, but were primarily worn to avoid messing your hair.

The funny thing is, when I lived in New York, my apartment was near an AME church. All of those ladies wore hats to church, every Sunday, and on Wednesday nights when they had their scripture study hours. Big elaborate hats, the kind you’d see at the Kentucky Derby. They must have paid a small fortune for them.

With fall coming in, I went to a department store and picked up a couple of hats–a camel fedora with a silk hatband, and a charcoal cloche with a feather rosette. Nothing big or ostentatious, and they both coordinate with my raincoat and my winter coat. They’ll keep me warm (a real consideration in upstate NY,) they should work fine for church, and I feel a lot more comfortable wearing them than wearing an actual veil or mantilla.
 
It is so interesting how our generation is reclaiming the traditions of our faith. And restoring the traditional meanings behind them.

We’re the church they never expected. The renewal they never anticipated.
 
I wear a veil all the time (headscarf or hijab that completely covers my hair).

I don’t live my life to please anyone else. I don’t give one half a flying rat’s patootie if someone doesn’t like my headcoverings, in or out of Mass.

Miz
 
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