very confused

[mangy_dog]

Hi everyone

I’m confused about something, and I really hope someone could give me some advice.

I just went to Confession this morning. It was great the priest gave me some great advice and I feel soo much better now and closer to God. (if you’ve seen my threads from before, I was struggling with a couple things)

well there’s one thing that still bothers me. It’s sort of complex…

I recently wrote a poem that’s sort of a prayer to Mary, in thanksgiving for my Total Consecration (which was in June). At one point when I was writing it, I just felt really thankful that she loves us so much as her children, and I told her that her love for me is like a priceless treasure. Of course this is even more true for Jesus’ love for me. I was just trying to find the right words.

Well last night, I was reading over the poem, and - I can’t decide if this is the devil or my conscience…
I started getting these thoughts, maybe I shouldn’t have said that, because even though we SHOULD be very devoted to Mary, even though we should love her a lot, - it is really God’s love that’s our “priceless treasure” first. Then I started getting these fears, what if when I wrote that, I forgot about Him, and so came to Mary “for her own sake” and committed idolatry? ah it’s like the old Protestant in me again… this hurts me though cause I don’t recall ever forgetting about His love while writing this poem, and I do value so highly my ‘relationship’ with Mary as well. She’s very special to me.

Well today at Confession, I really coudln’t make up my mind if it’s a sin or not, and if these thoughts came from my conscience, or the devil. I had A LOT of things to say to the priest, so I made up my mind to just include this in a list of other (in that case) sins by saying: “I put other things instead of God”

but now, afterwards, it’s STILL bothering me. Did I commit a sin? Should I have told the priest in detail about it? if it was a sin, is it alright how I confessed it?

the thing is, I feel so much guilt, but I don’t understand how it could be a sin, cause it’s TRUE that we should really value Mary’s love for us…we should just remember that it’s all for His sake first… to go through Mary to Jesus, not the other way around. And I honestly can’t remember anymore what my intentions were at that moment, whether I forgot about God or not. I feel like my memory is all messed up from thinking about this too much.

I’m sad I’m getting these thoughts, because I was so happy to go to Confession, I want to receive the Eucharist tomorrow soo much ,and also it’s the Assumption today!



anyone have any thoughts?

Your devotion to the Blessed Mother is a gift and Grace from God.

Lucifer and the demons are very afraid of her.

There is no danger in being close to the Immaculate Perpetual Virgin Mother of God.

 

[Cadian]

Your devotion to the Blessed Mother is a gift and Grace from God.

Lucifer and the demons are very afraid of her.

There is no danger in being close to the Immaculate Perpetual Virgin Mother of God.

Aye. I like to remember this little bit from Fr. John Corapi:

“Remember, Your Momma … wears Combat Boots!”

– Cadian :knight1:

 

[mangy_dog]

Aye. I like to remember this little bit from Fr. John Corapi:

“Remember, Your Momma … wears Combat Boots!”

– Cadian :knight1:

God bless Fr. Corapi.

 

[4EverHis]

I wanted to say that…

**YOU WERE ALL RIGHT **

I think it was from the devil. Cause ever since last night…it’s GONE. I have no worry any more. I don’t even feel like it was a sin. And God gave me this peace sometime after I spent some time just talking to Him.

thank you to everyone who prayed for me :hug1:
the prayers were answered!! just so you know.

I’m going to mention this to my priest at Confession to get some advice… (and I’ve noticed once we say something to our confessor, it’s like the devil has less power over that thing)

but…I totally agree there’s nothing wrong with honouring our Mother.

Im so weak. I keep on doubting everything so good that God is always supporting us.

God bless

 

[4EverHis]

All I know is that I need Mary.

Sometimes, when I’ve sinned, it’s so comforting to know that I have this loving mother to come to, to lay my head in her lap, to cry to, and to tell my sorrows and fears to – and she lets me. She corrects me so lightly and tenderly that I cannot help but want to be an obedient child, though I fail so miserably – and yet she doesn’t become impatient, or cross, or bitter; rather, she sees that I am a child no matter my age and supposed “maturity;” she sees that I still require milk rather than solid food; she sees that I’m still learning how to walk though my natural legs often lead me astray; she sees that I’m still learning to speak even though my natural mouth is filled with bitterness, anger, jealousy, lies and boastings.

She is such a loving mother, and she cares so much for all of us, and she wants all of us to trust her so that she can help us. And more than us, can you imagine the love she has for her son, who is her Lord and our Lord? Is there any natural bond stronger than mother-to-child? And yet, are we not called to love God with all our heart, all our soul, all our mind, and all our strength? I can’t even imagine the love which Mary has for her son, Jesus, who is the Son of God. I can’t even imagine such a great love. And what mother doesn’t wish to find a suitable spouse for her son? And yet Mary, this great mother of mercy, she sees suitable spouses in each and every soul that passes through this life, and she sends invitations, “Come, Soul, and receive the loving hand of my Son in indissoluble union.” And she sends, and she sends, and she sends these invitations because she so desperately wants all Souls to find completeness in her son, and she wants her son to receive what is rightfully His.

All I know is that I need Mary.

wow…so true brother

 

[4EverHis]

Thank-you very much for sharing your story. I really appreciated reading it.

It’s so weird for me to be on Catholic Answers reading so many struggles and torments people are enduring, while I’m just sitting here experiencing so many joys and consolations and no sufferings at all, aside from yesterday. It feels very strange.

my spiritual life goes really up and down…one day I feel really close to God, the next day I’m struggling.

well brother, you just made your Consecration that is wonderful that Our Lady has granted you this joy.

Here’s a quote from St. Teresa of Avila’s “Interior Castle,” from Chapter 2 of the Third Mansion:

thanks!!

My dear friend Monica

I make visits to the Blessed Sacrament near every day for a while and the one thing I think that makes God happiest is when we praise and bless His Mother. Stop worrying, all the praise you give to Mary God considers as given to Himself - and it’s extremely pleasing to Him. I’d venture to say God is more pleased when you praise His Mother than Him. I’m not saying we should ignore God or condoning idolatry, just trying to make a point as said.

May your Blessed Mother guide you in all things:thumbsup:

John

thanks John! that is what I believe too, that He is very pleased when we honour His Mother. And all the honour we give her, she in turn gives (perfectly) to Jesus!

Your devotion to the Blessed Mother is a gift and Grace from God.

Lucifer and the demons are very afraid of her.

There is no danger in being close to the Immaculate Perpetual Virgin Mother of God.

amen

God bless!!

 

[vinessa]

So at this moment, it’s like no matter what I do, I feel I’m offending God and sinning!!

It sounds to me like your conscience is becoming a god! That’s what scrupulous is. It has to do with believing that God must receive our perfect behaviour in order to love us. But it’s a lie. We don’t try to be good in order to “earn” God’s approval or love. We try to be good because we love God! Our love should be a gift to Him, not a bribe so we can stay out of trouble. We try out best because we’re grateful and because love is in our hearts, not because we think we can manipulate His favor by being good.

God doesn’t expect our perfection. He just values our best efforts. And one of the things He’s BEST at is forgiveness!! We should follow His example and learn to do the same.

If your “conscience” is beating you up, I would seriously question whether or not it is becoming your god – more than the Father who forgives you and is simply happy that you are close to Him and trying your best. You don’t show him honor by imagining that He COULDN’T POSSIBLY forgive you, love you, or shower grace on you unless you do everything exactly perfectly always.

Jesus said we need to love God -AND- love others as we love ourselves. I don’t see anything in His words that says love God and others, but never give yourself a break, treat yourself harshly, and drive yourself to the wall with perfectionism. How unloving is that?

Stop making your conscience into a god. It’s important, but it’s not more important than the “greatest commandment” to be loving and to forgive, self and others.

 

[edward_leblanc]

Don’ t,let your heart be confused ,by loving our most Holy Mother Of God. I pray the Rosary every night ,and she is in my thoughts ,what a wonderful and awesome way to show Jesus our Savior ,our love to him ,by loving his mother .The evil one is confusing you.in order to make you doubt.Stop. worrying my friend. God is very near you always.Just live you life with love .compassion.and prayer ,God hears your heart . God Bless you.

 

[johngh]

Mary is something I struggle with as well. Sometimes I don’t like saying a Hail Mary or especially praying the Rosary because it just feels strange. The same is true of Saints as well. I have never in my almost 2 1/2 years of being Catholic prayed to a Saint, at least in a very serious, heartfelt way.

I think my reason for it is that I was not raised religious, I came to shoe beliefs on my own. Around highschool I started praying to God, but only to him because I still did not have any specific religious beliefs. That has stuck with me, and even now that I am Catholic and very dedicated to my Faith, I usually only pray to God the Father. As to whether that is a bad thing or not, I am honestly not sure.

 

[mangy_dog]

Mary is something I struggle with as well. Sometimes I don’t like saying a Hail Mary or especially praying the Rosary because it just feels strange. The same is true of Saints as well. I have never in my almost 2 1/2 years of being Catholic prayed to a Saint, at least in a very serious, heartfelt way.

I think my reason for it is that I was not raised religious, I came to shoe beliefs on my own. Around highschool I started praying to God, but only to him because I still did not have any specific religious beliefs. That has stuck with me, and even now that I am Catholic and very dedicated to my Faith, I usually only pray to God the Father. As to whether that is a bad thing or not, I am honestly not sure.

Hello John,

Think of your Catholic church as a 3 dimensional church…The church militant - you and I are this one; the church suffering - the souls in Purgatory are in this one; and the church Triumphant - Mary and all the Saints are in this one.

In the same way that I pray for you, I also pray for the souls in Purgatory and …the Saints in heaven pray for you and me.

When we consider the Catholic church in this light the number is no longer one billion but billions upon billions of catholics.

 

[IanGE]

I am deeply grateful to Monica and Johngh for their honesty and others for their encouraging replies. When I was a child I found our church very harsh: God the Father was a terrifying God who seemed to be watching and waiting for this horrid little boy to sin.
Jesus was either an ineffectual baby brought out at Christmas or a mangled ruin to be wept over during lent. I was also terrified of ghosts and those ghost stories we scared ourselves with; the Holy Ghost was still a ghost and I avoided Him too. In any case, nothing much was said about Him, except “Glory be the to Father, the Son and the mumble-mumble”!!!
The only loving, caring one in Heaven was our Lady Mary and I prayed solely to her, poured out my heart to her, felt her consolation and love. I went away from this fear-filled church for 21 years and came back by being led (by Our Lady, I’m sure) to give my life to Jesus. Who led me to my baptism in the Spirit, gifts of Tongues and more. Almost immediately the Bible became a love letter from God, words of gold floating off the pages straight into my new heart. One of those was Jesus saying, “I am the way and the Truth”, which gave me pause in my prayers to Our Lady.
Like Johngh I tried to avoid saying the Hail Mary at Mass and once decided to pray in Tongues during the Hail Mary. Suddenly I heard this sweet, lady’s voice, full of humour, saying: “I hear you, Ian!” Of course, She prays in tongues, too. I’ve had no problems since then!

 

[4EverHis]

It sounds to me like your conscience is becoming a god! That’s what scrupulous is. It has to do with believing that God must receive our perfect behaviour in order to love us. But it’s a lie. We don’t try to be good in order to “earn” God’s approval or love. We try to be good because we love God! Our love should be a gift to Him, not a bribe so we can stay out of trouble. We try out best because we’re grateful and because love is in our hearts, not because we think we can manipulate His favor by being good.

God doesn’t expect our perfection. He just values our best efforts. And one of the things He’s BEST at is forgiveness!! We should follow His example and learn to do the same.

If your “conscience” is beating you up, I would seriously question whether or not it is becoming your god – more than the Father who forgives you and is simply happy that you are close to Him and trying your best. You don’t show him honor by imagining that He COULDN’T POSSIBLY forgive you, love you, or shower grace on you unless you do everything exactly perfectly always.

Jesus said we need to love God -AND- love others as we love ourselves. I don’t see anything in His words that says love God and others, but never give yourself a break, treat yourself harshly, and drive yourself to the wall with perfectionism. How unloving is that?

Stop making your conscience into a god. It’s important, but it’s not more important than the “greatest commandment” to be loving and to forgive, self and others.

that’s a great point, thanks!

Don’ t,let your heart be confused ,by loving our most Holy Mother Of God. I pray the Rosary every night ,and she is in my thoughts ,what a wonderful and awesome way to show Jesus our Savior ,our love to him ,by loving his mother .The evil one is confusing you.in order to make you doubt.Stop. worrying my friend. God is very near you always.Just live you life with love .compassion.and prayer ,God hears your heart . God Bless you.

thank you for the kind response :hug1:

Mary is something I struggle with as well. Sometimes I don’t like saying a Hail Mary or especially praying the Rosary because it just feels strange. The same is true of Saints as well. I have never in my almost 2 1/2 years of being Catholic prayed to a Saint, at least in a very serious, heartfelt way.

I think my reason for it is that I was not raised religious, I came to shoe beliefs on my own. Around highschool I started praying to God, but only to him because I still did not have any specific religious beliefs. That has stuck with me, and even now that I am Catholic and very dedicated to my Faith, I usually only pray to God the Father. As to whether that is a bad thing or not, I am honestly not sure.

I used to be VERY afraid of devotion to Mary. I mean… I used to reject her altogether, not just the Catholic view, but I felt a dislike for Mary in general it sounds like with you though, it’s just something you’re not really used to yet. Perhaps you could give it a leap of faith and try it out I found that idolatry only happens when we love Jesus less, not when we love Mary a lot. As long as God is still number one, all is well. And she leads us closer to Him I think there’s really a lot to be gained in devotion to Mary… but I’m also still very new at it, I only became Catholic this Easter. Maybe this is something you could pray about to God

Hello John,

Think of your Catholic church as a 3 dimensional church…The church militant - you and I are this one; the church suffering - the souls in Purgatory are in this one; and the church Triumphant - Mary and all the Saints are in this one.

In the same way that I pray for you, I also pray for the souls in Purgatory and …the Saints in heaven pray for you and me.

When we consider the Catholic church in this light the number is no longer one billion but billions upon billions of catholics.

that’s pretty awesome

 

[4EverHis]

I am deeply grateful to Monica and Johngh for their honesty and others for their encouraging replies. When I was a child I found our church very harsh: God the Father was a terrifying God who seemed to be watching and waiting for this horrid little boy to sin.
Jesus was either an ineffectual baby brought out at Christmas or a mangled ruin to be wept over during lent. I was also terrified of ghosts and those ghost stories we scared ourselves with; the Holy Ghost was still a ghost and I avoided Him too. In any case, nothing much was said about Him, except “Glory be the to Father, the Son and the mumble-mumble”!!!
The only loving, caring one in Heaven was our Lady Mary and I prayed solely to her, poured out my heart to her, felt her consolation and love. I went away from this fear-filled church for 21 years and came back by being led (by Our Lady, I’m sure) to give my life to Jesus. Who led me to my baptism in the Spirit, gifts of Tongues and more. Almost immediately the Bible became a love letter from God, words of gold floating off the pages straight into my new heart. One of those was Jesus saying, “I am the way and the Truth”, which gave me pause in my prayers to Our Lady.
Like Johngh I tried to avoid saying the Hail Mary at Mass and once decided to pray in Tongues during the Hail Mary. Suddenly I heard this sweet, lady’s voice, full of humour, saying: “I hear you, Ian!” Of course, She prays in tongues, too. I’ve had no problems since then!

Ian, thanks for sharing about your journey that’s so interesting! With me, I only recently accepted what the Church teaches about Our Lady. I used to struggle with it a lot. Since then, I havent’ had any problems with devotion to her until the time I posted this thread… it’s strange how I suddenly got these doubts. I think that since then though, God has really helped me… I think He’s given me peace about it and to be honest I’m so glad devotion to Mary is alright after all. I was so nervous for a while!

It seems there are many people who struggle with devotion to Mary and to the Saints, and others who don’t struggle with it, and then there are people who turn to Mary cause they’re afraid of God, like how you described your childhood… It seems each person’s journey is very unique in this regard. I’m the person who struggled with devotion to Mary. But I think what really helped is just seeing that there’s no competition between Jesus and Mary, that it’s perfectly alright (good even) to really love them both, to pray to both of them, and when I talk to Mary, Jesus is pleased

the first time I prayed the Rosary, I got this image… that as I’m praying, both Jesus and Mary are listening to me together. That gave me a lot of peace.

God bless!

 

[PJM]

Hi everyone

I’m confused about something, and I really hope someone could give me some advice.

I just went to Confession this morning. It was great the priest gave me some great advice and I feel soo much better now and closer to God. (if you’ve seen my threads from before, I was struggling with a couple things)

well there’s one thing that still bothers me. It’s sort of complex…

I recently wrote a poem that’s sort of a prayer to Mary, in thanksgiving for my Total Consecration (which was in June). At one point when I was writing it, I just felt really thankful that she loves us so much as her children, and I told her that her love for me is like a priceless treasure. Of course this is even more true for Jesus’ love for me. I was just trying to find the right words.

Well last night, I was reading over the poem, and - I can’t decide if this is the devil or my conscience…

I started getting these thoughts, maybe I shouldn’t have said that, because even though we SHOULD be very devoted to Mary, even though we should love her a lot, - it is really God’s love that’s our “priceless treasure” first. Then I started getting these fears, what if when I wrote that, I forgot about Him, and so came to Mary “for her own sake” and committed idolatry? ah it’s like the old Protestant in me again… this hurts me though cause I don’t recall ever forgetting about His love while writing this poem, and I do value so highly my ‘relationship’ with Mary as well. She’s very special to me.

Well today at Confession, I really coudln’t make up my mind if it’s a sin or not, and if these thoughts came from my conscience, or the devil. I had A LOT of things to say to the priest, so I made up my mind to just include this in a list of other (in that case) sins by saying: “I put other things instead of God”

but now, afterwards, it’s STILL bothering me. Did I commit a sin? Should I have told the priest in detail about it? if it was a sin, is it alright how I confessed it?

Was it a sin or was it a Mortal sin? NO, and No. Why, because you have to know before hand that it is a Mortal sin and still desire to do it.

Second consideration: Catholics who like you are informed actually pray THROUGH Mary, more than “to Mary” all though both occour. If the objrct of our Marian and Saints prayers are to help us grow closer to Jesus, then they are “intercessory”, have Jesus as their Goal and that is just as God would have us do?

Satan has no power over our “freewill” in other words Santan, in a real sense can’t make us do this or that. Where Satan does his dirty work is by messing with our emotions.
So this seems clearly a case of Satan is trying to win one back in the bottom of the 9th.

If this happens again pray to The Holy Spirit: Dear Holy Spirit, please rid me of these evil thoughts and send Satan back to hell. Amen! * THANK YOU! 2 Cor. 2 “11 to keep Satan from gaining the advantage over us; for we are not ignorant of his designs.”] and Mt. 4:10 "10* Then Jesus said to him, “Begone, Satan! for it is written, ‘You shall worship the Lord your God and him only shall you serve.’”

Fear not, God is on your side, and so is our BVM!*

 

[brigid12]

Monica,

Lauding His Mother certainly doesn’t take anything away from Him! To a mother, her child is everything and to that child mommy is the most beautiful, wonderful lady there is. I agree with John R (and numerous Saints) that one of the things that He loves to hear most is praise and devotion to His mother.

(And yup, can’t sin mortally unless you know what you are doing is a grave sin beforehand.)

 

[glenaitken]

Hi everyone

I’m confused about something, and I really hope someone could give me some advice.

I just went to Confession this morning. It was great the priest gave me some great advice and I feel soo much better now and closer to God. (if you’ve seen my threads from before, I was struggling with a couple things)

well there’s one thing that still bothers me. It’s sort of complex…

I recently wrote a poem that’s sort of a prayer to Mary, in thanksgiving for my Total Consecration (which was in June). At one point when I was writing it, I just felt really thankful that she loves us so much as her children, and I told her that her love for me is like a priceless treasure. Of course this is even more true for Jesus’ love for me. I was just trying to find the right words.

Well last night, I was reading over the poem, and - I can’t decide if this is the devil or my conscience…
I started getting these thoughts, maybe I shouldn’t have said that, because even though we SHOULD be very devoted to Mary, even though we should love her a lot, - it is really God’s love that’s our “priceless treasure” first. Then I started getting these fears, what if when I wrote that, I forgot about Him, and so came to Mary “for her own sake” and committed idolatry? ah it’s like the old Protestant in me again… this hurts me though cause I don’t recall ever forgetting about His love while writing this poem, and I do value so highly my ‘relationship’ with Mary as well. She’s very special to me.

Well today at Confession, I really coudln’t make up my mind if it’s a sin or not, and if these thoughts came from my conscience, or the devil. I had A LOT of things to say to the priest, so I made up my mind to just include this in a list of other (in that case) sins by saying: “I put other things instead of God”

but now, afterwards, it’s STILL bothering me. Did I commit a sin? Should I have told the priest in detail about it? if it was a sin, is it alright how I confessed it?

the thing is, I feel so much guilt, but I don’t understand how it could be a sin, cause it’s TRUE that we should really value Mary’s love for us…we should just remember that it’s all for His sake first… to go through Mary to Jesus, not the other way around. And I honestly can’t remember anymore what my intentions were at that moment, whether I forgot about God or not. I feel like my memory is all messed up from thinking about this too much.

I’m sad I’m getting these thoughts, because I was so happy to go to Confession, I want to receive the Eucharist tomorrow soo much ,and also it’s the Assumption today!



anyone have any thoughts?

there is nothing wrong here as far as i can see. the fact that you fear offending God in this way shows me that you are not commiting a sin. My guess is that the devil is tricking you. when you pray to the blessed mother, have an image handy of her either holding Christ or her at the Cross. Don’t worry too much. Mary won;t let herslf be worshiped.

 

[4EverHis]

thank you everyone! this really helped, I’m glad I made this thread. God bless!