Very Lapsed Catholic... Can I Come Back? How?

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Wow, what an outpouring of support! Your kind words have made me feel a lot better and given me some hope… and you are right, it is very important to have hope. For the first time in many years I sat down with my mother today and we prayed the rosary… I had forgotten what a beautiful and amazing thing it is! It certainly helped me to have more faith, though I am still wavering a bit.

Do you think you could help answer some questions that I have? I feel like my ignorance is really getting in the way of my relationship with God, like a hurdle that I can’t jump on my own.

– How is it that 1(fully God) +1(fully human) =1 (Jesus)?
– How is it that the Trinity is both 3 and 1 at the same time? I thought it was three aspects of the same thing, like two sides of the same coin only with three, but apparently that is not correct.
– Why does the Bible have some seeming contradictions in it? Is it because something is lost in translation, and if so, what have we lost?
– God, being God, is obviously omniscient. But Satan is a fallen angel, right? So did God plan for Satan to exist? Why? (Maybe dynamic tension… like you can’t choose God unless you have some other option to follow because He can’t make us love Him?)
– If He can’t make us love Him, does that mean He is not omnipotent?
– Is it that God doesn’t want to violate our free will, or that He can’t? If he can’t, doesn’t that mean He is omnipotent?
– God, still intrinsically omniscient, must’ve known that He’d had to send His Son Jesus to die for our sins and that Judas would have to betray Him. Why did God make it so that Judas had to betray Jesus? That is a pretty awful setup… somebody had to do it, but doesn’t that also interfere with free will/predestination?
– How does Jesus dying pay for our sins? I get that He is God, obviously, but I don’t see why He’d have to die to save us (though I am most certainly glad that He did!)
– Since Jesus did die for our sins, how come some people still go to Hell?
– What happens if you died before Jesus was born?
– How does transubstantiation work? I know that the host and wine become His Body and Blood, but how? It just doesn’t make sense (which is why it is a miracle, I guess)!
– How is it that the Blessed Virgin Mary can be both a virgin and Jesus’ mom?
– Why is it that the doctrine of natural law exists? I understand that it is why all intercourse has to be open to the possibility of conception, but how did this all get started? Why does it still continue today?
– How does the priest saying the absolution cleanse a person of their sins? Why doesn’t a person confessing their sins directly to God count? If prayer is not sufficient for that, is it sufficient for other things?
– God created everything, including other religions, right? So why are there so many other religions than our one true religion? Or would that be the evil one trying to decieve us and lead us astray? I’m not saying that the other religions are satanic but since they are wrong, what should we do? Obviously treat them with dignity and love, but do we try to convert them or just let it sit?
– What happens to miscarried babies? Why does God let them be concieved if He knows they’ll be miscarried?
– How do indulgences work? It says in the front of my Bible that if I read it for half an hour then my venial sins are cleared for the day… does this take the place of Reconciliation if I have not sinned mortally? Also, it is wonderful to say a novena or a Mass for someone’s soul, but how does that expedite their time in Purgatory? Doesn’t a person have to learn the lesson/get the grace for themselves?

I know that that is a lot of questions… unfortunately I was so jaded about my so-called atheism that I squandered the marvelous learning opportunities I had in attending a Catholic high school with theology classes. My knowledge is rudimentary at best, I fear.
 
Edward62 said:
But among my sins I have committed the unforgivable sin many times… I have deliberately blasphemed and denied the existence of God! Doesn’t the Bible say that my soul is immediately condemned upon doing that?:crying:
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No, that is a slightly incorrect interpretation of that passage. What the unforgivable sin is, would be FINAL impennitence. That means that when you die you refuse to accept God’s forgiveness. While we are still alive, we can go to Him with anything through His priest and as long as you are sorry, you will be forgiven. It is such a beautiful thing to have such mercy from God.

So, as stated before, go to confission and talk to the priest about your concerns…He will hopefully have some great help for you!!
 
Edward62 said:
Do you think you could help answer some questions that I have? I feel like my ignorance is really getting in the way of my relationship with God, like a hurdle that I can’t jump on my own.
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Well, I can’t get into all these questions right now as I have to take off in a few.
I will give you a link to a great site that will have answers to many of your questions.
newadvent.org/

And, welcome back and welcome to a wonderful learning journey that you are jumping onto. Also, if you have a Catholic radio station in your area, you might listen to it…the station in my area has been a great help for my learning process.
 
– How does the priest saying the absolution cleanse a person of their sins? Why doesn’t a person confessing their sins directly to God count? If prayer is not sufficient for that, is it sufficient for other things?
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You have asked a series of questions in post# 21. They are good questions; however, it is not possible to discuss so many questions in one thread.

Since your concern is about coming back to the Church, I will try to answer the above question. Like other posters suggested, Confession is the important first step.

Jesus gave his disciples the power to bind and loose sins, to forgive sins in God’s name. Priests are the representatives of Christ on earth. The right of absolution was imparted to priests by our Lord Himself. Please refer to John 20:23, Matthew 16:19, and 18:18. The saying of absolution by a priest to forgive sins is established by our Lord Jesus. That is why we Catholics follow the true Church’s teaching and go to confession. The Sacrament of Confession is firmly grounded in Scripture and Christian Tradition. Catholics are required to confess mortal sins to priest. Venial sins are pardoned in our prayers, in Mass and Eucharist.

We learn humility by going to confession even for venial sins. Since confession is a Sacrament, we obtain God’s grace by receiving this precious Sacrament. Please fully utilize this Sacrament of Mercy.
 
Edward62 said:
I have a lot of questions, and I wonder if you might shed some light on the matters. I am a lapsed Catholic… I was very faithful until about the age of fifteen, and then I became very angry with the Church and left in an immature huff. Now I am eighteen years old and realizing the error of my ways, but finding it very difficult to come back to the Church I loved so very much.

I have such nagging doubts about the very existence of God, though I know He is real… probably left over from my days as an “atheist”. I talk to my friends about this and they laugh, saying they can’t believe I would be a Catholic, don’t I know this or that… and I do know of it, I just know it is wrong. I want to be a Catholic, but no matter how hard I pray, I keep thinking that I’m never going to find God again. Plus I’m not at all sure I can come back into the Church, which really makes me scared and sad.

Is there hope? I know that all things are possible through God, but I’m not sure that I can hold up my end of the deal.
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I’m probably being too simplistic, but it is my understanding that all you need do is go to confession with a repentent heart, and then just resume going to mass, praying, and taking communion. I really think that’s all there is to it. If you did not become confirmed prior to leaving the Church, then you’ll need RCIA, most likely. Yes…there’s hope aplenty. Rejoice. God never stops loving you, and Jesus Christ is the Way, the Truth and the Light no matter how far we stray. Jesus will rejoice when you share in communion with him again. You are the prodigal son from the Gospels. Most of what you say here is the reason for reconciliation. None of us are perfect, and we all go all over the map in our journey. None of us measures up, or “keeps our end of the deal” 100% of the time. We just try. We use our free will to “choose” to try, anyway. When we fall, Jesus is there to pick us up, dust us off, and give us encouragement to try again.

Heavenly Father, we thank you for pointing Edward back in the direction of your Church. We pray that you accept him with open and loving arms, and help him to open his heart to your radiant, and eternal love. We ask this in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.

Amen

Peace to you,

and welcome home!

Steven
 
Just want to add cmonback.com as a resource for your journey. I was gone for 8 years, and like others, the afternoon I went to confession was a turning point in my life. Awesome, awesome.
 
Start by going to confession at any Catholic Church on a Saturday afternoon. Just check the hours.

“Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been 30 years [or whatever] since my last Confession. I am a very lapsed Catholic. But I would like to come back. No idea where to start. Don’t know if I will be able to receive Holy Communion.”

The priest will take it from there.

Then, just start going to Mass on Sunday.

If there are some outstanding issues, you may or may not be able to receive Holy Communion. Ask the confessor.

Many of my friends have done exactly just that. Gone to confession after decades away and laid it all out. They universally have said the priest was incredibly kind. They said they felt wonderful afterwards.

My experience has been that confessors are incredibly generous and charitable.
 
I cannot recommend that the OP receive the Sacrament of Confession until he can truthfully affirm that he believes that the Sacrament does what we believe it does. To send him into a confessional to obtain a grace he does not really believe he is receiving is to further confirm within him the idea that the Church is false and filled with empty, meaningless rituals. Even if accurate, his admission of his errors to the priest would be sterile and false, ultimately rendering his attempted use of the Sacrament sacrilegious. We must be careful to inculcate great respect for the Sacraments, especially in those wayward souls who have chosen to estrange themselves from the Church for a time. Above all, we must guard against the specter of using Reconciliation as a magic ritual wherein the interior disposition of the penitent is irrelevant.
 
Edward62 said:
I have a lot of questions, and I wonder if you might shed some light on the matters. I am a lapsed Catholic… I was very faithful until about the age of fifteen, and then I became very angry with the Church and left in an immature huff. Now I am eighteen years old and realizing the error of my ways, but finding it very difficult to come back to the Church I loved so very much.

I have such nagging doubts about the very existence of God, though I know He is real… probably left over from my days as an “atheist”. I talk to my friends about this and they laugh, saying they can’t believe I would be a Catholic, don’t I know this or that… and I do know of it, I just know it is wrong. I want to be a Catholic, but no matter how hard I pray, I keep thinking that I’m never going to find God again. Plus I’m not at all sure I can come back into the Church, which really makes me scared and sad.

Is there hope? I know that all things are possible through God, but I’m not sure that I can hold up my end of the deal.
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Dear Edward,

I am a nineteen year old guy. Like you, I’ve, ‘been there, done that.’ I went through my, resented the Church-doubted God-practically atheist stage. And I’ve come through it. And, by God’s grace and the prayers of friends, my faith is stronger than ever.

There is hope. I assure you. If you’d like to talk to me about my experience, I’d be happy to. By the Good Lord I am in His grace now. Thinking of the hope I so desperately needed in the depths of my alienation from God, I forgot how far I had fallen.

In man there is infinite emptiness. In God there is infinite fullness. Most truly did St. Augustine say, “our hearts are restless until they rest in thee, O Lord.”

For now, I’d like to get into bed, but please contact me by PM, or we can talk over an instant messenger like AIM, and I’d be happy to talk to you.

-Rob
 
I’ve lapsed a few times, especially when other Catholics emphasise the authority of the church in such a way it seems like a straitjacket, rather than an aspect of the Church as a whole. One can find God in surprising places; you find the Absolute keeps popping up in many areas, in Philosophy. In my own case, the Catholic contemplative tradition seems to keep rescuing my faith all the time. In a way it seems to me all questions in philosophy and thought converge towards the Infinite. I found as I contemplated the Infinite and its nature, even from a Philosophical viewpoint, one is not just filled with rational wonder but also awe and love. When love enters into the equation I found you have religion.

The Catholic mystical tradition in my view offers a way a Christian can approach the Absolute (of which Infinity is a key property) in ways which go beyond the dry logic of philosophy or the harsh empiricism of science, and gives one a sense of meaning and wholeness to life. There are other religions and forms of Christianity but it just seems there comes a point where reason can go no further and you just have to approach the Absolute behind a ‘Cloud of Unknowing.’ To love this and to know you are loved by the Infinite, seems to offer a completion to life and one’s finite nature which clears away anxiety and angst in the face of pain, death, suffering and mortality. So long as the church continues and reveres its tradition of contemplation, I don’t think I would leave permanently.
 
Edward62 said:
But among my sins I have committed the unforgivable sin many times… I have deliberately blasphemed and denied the existence of God! Doesn’t the Bible say that my soul is immediately condemned upon doing that?:crying:
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no the bible says many times to repent, undergo conversion, turn away from sin, and be healed by the grace of Jesus Christ, freely available to you in the sacraments.

Welcome home, sometimes the road home is long and bumpy and full of detours but you have already taken the first step.

by the way, I want to warn you about the rosary, if you pick one up and start using it, even if you are not sure how, Mary will take charge and you will be back in the arms of Holy Mother Church before you can say “follow the yellow brick road”. That is the express route, or you can, at the same time, take the route of studying your faith, participating in these forums, using resources on this website etc. If you really want a red bull to get you going, go to confession now.
 
puzzleannie said:
by the way, I want to warn you about the rosary, if you pick one up and start using it, even if you are not sure how, Mary will take charge and you will be back in the arms of Holy Mother Church before you can say “follow the yellow brick road”.
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Yep, this was my experience, too.:yup:
 
I just got back from confession and I can’t tell you how much that helped! It’s kind of like taking a shower, only I had no idea how absolutely grimy my soul really was until I was confessing.

I still have a lot of questions, and wonder how I might come about the answers… but confession and a daily rosary has indeed kickstarted my way back to the Church! I can’t wait to recieve the Eucharist tomorrow morning!
 
Edward62 said:
I just got back from confession and I can’t tell you how much that helped! It’s kind of like taking a shower, only I had no idea how absolutely grimy my soul really was until I was confessing.

I still have a lot of questions, and wonder how I might come about the answers… but confession and a daily rosary has indeed kickstarted my way back to the Church! I can’t wait to recieve the Eucharist tomorrow morning!
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Hurray! We’re having a virtual CAF party for you here, and I KNOW that the angels are having a party for you in heaven right now, too!:extrahappy: :bounce:

There are a lot of good people here on these forums, so I suggest that you ask away. Maybe start a new thread for each question, and don’t try to get every single question answered at one time- you will feel overwhelmed.

Good luck and God Bless!
 
Edward62 said:
I just got back from confession and I can’t tell you how much that helped! It’s kind of like taking a shower, only I had no idea how absolutely grimy my soul really was until I was confessing.

I still have a lot of questions, and wonder how I might come about the answers… but confession and a daily rosary has indeed kickstarted my way back to the Church! I can’t wait to recieve the Eucharist tomorrow morning!
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Wow. Awesome.

Welcome home, Brother!
Luke 15:7:
I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.
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JD
 
Edward62 said:
I just got back from confession and I can’t tell you how much that helped! It’s kind of like taking a shower, only I had no idea how absolutely grimy my soul really was until I was confessing.

I still have a lot of questions, and wonder how I might come about the answers… but confession and a daily rosary has indeed kickstarted my way back to the Church! I can’t wait to recieve the Eucharist tomorrow morning!
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Congratulations!!
Praise the Lord!!
I am so so glad to hear the good news.
Keep the consuming fire of love burning in your heart. Keep on keeping on!
God bless!!
 
Edward62 said:
I just got back from confession and I can’t tell you how much that helped! It’s kind of like taking a shower, only I had no idea how absolutely grimy my soul really was until I was confessing.

I still have a lot of questions, and wonder how I might come about the answers… but confession and a daily rosary has indeed kickstarted my way back to the Church! I can’t wait to recieve the Eucharist tomorrow morning!
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Welcome back!
  • Al
 
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