Vocation For An Engaged 24yo? Help!

[tonyk84]

Hi everyone,

I’m engaged and will be married next year to my fiancee, I am 24 years of age and live in England.

I also feel a calling for a vocation, I feel I could easily become a Franciscan or Dominican and give my life to God in this way, Religious life is something that really interest’s me, I have really desire to find more about our faith, history, scripture, prayer, etc, which I am doing, this site and radio station has been a real help.

I was an alter boy when I was young, and always wanted to become a priest, then my parents started moving alot and I never got settled at a parish. Then when I hit my teens I fell away from the faith, then i hit my twenties and started getting back into our faith, now I back stronger than ever and have this strong calling.

I have enquired about becoming a deacon but I have to be 35years old, So that is out of the question!

Is there anything else a soon to be married young man can look into? any help/advice is really appreciated:thumbsup:

Thanks and God Bless.

Tony.

 

[Cominghome89]

First, I would get a good spiritual director, a local priest or religious that you feel comfortable talking to. They could give you much better advice for your life and situation than anyone here. The fact that you are engaged and still even considering a religious life means you want to get some good, sound advice and think things through before making any decision either way.

If you decided God is calling you to married life, there are many other vocations open to you. In a parish, you could participate in lay ministries, such as CCD or adult education. Religious communities, including the Dominicans and Franciscans, have third orders that are open to singles and couples who wish to live the charism of the order. I suggest you read into third orders.

Also, there’s nothing wrong with getting married and keeping the idea of the permanent diaconate open. It’s only ten years away, and who knows, maybe by that age you’ll find that it WAS your calling, and that God wanted you to wait.

As someone currently discerning a call to the priesthood, I understand the confusion and difficulty you are feeling. Keep praying, reading scripture and living your Catholic faith, and remember that you have plenty of options God will surely lead you where you belong.

 

[Cloisters]

Hi everyone,

I’m engaged and will be married next year to my fiancee, I am 24 years of age and live in England.

I also feel a calling for a vocation, I feel I could easily become a Franciscan or Dominican and give my life to God in this way, Religious life is something that really interest’s me, I have really desire to find more about our faith, history, scripture, prayer, etc, which I am doing, this site and radio station has been a real help.

I was an alter boy when I was young, and always wanted to become a priest, then my parents started moving alot and I never got settled at a parish. Then when I hit my teens I fell away from the faith, then i hit my twenties and started getting back into our faith, now I back stronger than ever and have this strong calling.

I have enquired about becoming a deacon but I have to be 35years old, So that is out of the question!

Is there anything else a soon to be married young man can look into? any help/advice is really appreciated:thumbsup:

Thanks and God Bless.

Tony.

Did you “just know it” when you met her? Did your very soul feel a tug toward her? Did your heart feel as if it did actual sumersaults when you met her? Or as my mom put it once, did you feel like you’re cut from the same cloth?

You’ve not made any committments as of yet–except to the lady you plan to marry. What attracted her to you and vice versa? Are you two peas in a pod and complement each other in daily life? Marriage is 90 percent team problem-solving and 10 percent “physical” relations (I think you know what I mean). That second number goes way down when the kids start coming.

Have you shared this new attraction with your fiance? The Holy Ghost works on attraction, so if you’re feeling pulled to the religious life, I would highly recommend asking your fiance if you can discern with some religious communities. They deal with your kind of situation all the time, and would be able to help you discern your priorities.

This new attraction could have also been sent to test the relationship. True love is tested under fire. Remember what I said about team problem-solving? Instead of berating one’s partner for their failings, one jumps in to fill in. Rejoice in each other’s strengths and support each other in your weaknesses.

HTH.

Blessings,
Cloisters

 

[JReducation]

Marriage vows, like the vows of Franciscans and Dominicans, which you mentioned, are solemn vows too. They are mutually exclusive. Therefore, I would not enter into a marriage until I was certain that I could fulfill these vows.

I strongly suggest a lot of conversation with a spiritual director, if you have not started to talk to one yet. Also, many dioceses have a Vicar of Religious. They are very good guides on these matters. You can call your local chancery or pastoral center and ask for an appointment or write him/her.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF