Vocation, Past sins, Guilt

  • Thread starter Thread starter TwoNames
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
T

TwoNames

Guest
A while ago, I started a process of discernment about my vocation (talked with my priest and others, I even have scheduled a meeting with a vocation director). Soon after the first concrete steps in the process, my consciousness started being bombarded with my past sins. I dismissed them as a temptation trying to confuse me (being aware of my problems with scrupulosity). But then there were some other sins of my past presented … well especially one that I committed a few years ago and it involved another person. The sin was very, very serious indeed, but also well confessed (I confessed it twice - scrupulosity- in all the details). I also apologized to the person (for allowing it to happen, since I knew it was wrong and I should have made the right choice). I’m close to giving up on the discernment, even though I’m pretty sure i have the calling.
I was always aware of my sins, but was at peace, knowing that I am forgiven… That was all true up until now. I’m not doubting that I am forgiven, but now the pain and the shame of my sins, especially this one sin, is so crippling, it makes me despair and it makes me feel disgusting and I can not see how I can continue with my discernment, even though it’s what I really wish.

Please pray for guidance and peace.
 
TwoNames,

oh we share so much (different times, different circumstances, different places), and so many of the same thoughts, inadequacies,ans especially lingering continual guilt…go with your heart…go with the Lord!

you will be remembered in my prayers…
 
Praying to the Holy Spirit to give you guidance, direction, strength, fortitude & wisdom in your discernment.
 
(Simon Peter) fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, “Go away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man!”…
Luke 5:8

That didn’t stop Jesus from recruiting Peter.
 
TwoNames said:
A while ago, I started a process of discernment about my vocation (talked with my priest and others, I even have scheduled a meeting with a vocation director). Soon after the first concrete steps in the process, my consciousness started being bombarded with my past sins. I dismissed them as a temptation trying to confuse me (being aware of my problems with scrupulosity). But then there were some other sins of my past presented … well especially one that I committed a few years ago and it involved another person. The sin was very, very serious indeed, but also well confessed (I confessed it twice - scrupulosity- in all the details). I also apologized to the person (for allowing it to happen, since I knew it was wrong and I should have made the right choice). I’m close to giving up on the discernment, even though I’m pretty sure i have the calling.
I was always aware of my sins, but was at peace, knowing that I am forgiven… That was all true up until now. I’m not doubting that I am forgiven, but now the pain and the shame of my sins, especially this one sin, is so crippling, it makes me despair and it makes me feel disgusting and I can not see how I can continue with my discernment, even though it’s what I really wish.

Please pray for guidance and peace.
Click to expand...
Tell “in confession” a vocation director that sin, and ask is it an impediment to discerning priesthood.

Canon law has a list of sins which are permanent impediments (those who organised or caused an abortion, euthanasia, or murder, can never become priests),
And canon law has mentions of sins that can be given a dispensation by the bishop (such as suicide, causing harm, suicide attempts,) so these second lists of sins a bishop must be told and he can tell the.candidate his.judgement, eg, that they can discern priesthood or not.

Tell your vocation director during confession.
Because otherwise he is not bound to keep whatever you say to him.a secret.
 
If the devil is not bothering you, you’re not bothering the devil. Keep discerning! Say a Glory Be (heartfelt) every time this guilt comes over you; God will take care of the rest. St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle, be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray, and do thou, O Prince of the Heavenly Hosts, by Divine power, thrust into hell satan and all the evil spirits, who roam throughout the world, seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.
 
Well, just got back from the superior of the order (who is also the vocation director). He saw that I was troubled and we talked. I asked him if I can cofess my sins and I did make a general confession. I told my past sins. I also told him that I am afraid that this closes the doors to what I feel is my vocation. I was especially detailed when it came to the sins that are bothering me the most. I also told him about my tedency towards scrupulosity and past problems with depression. He absolved me and told me that I am welcome and that the doors are always opened for me. We even talked more about my vocation and what is the next step in joining. I am a lot calmer now.
Thank you for all the prayers. God bless. 🙂
 
Gracious and merciful Father, please come to their assistance.

Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
Amen.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

Glory Be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end.
Amen.
 
Thank you, for all the prayers! I must say though, that after a brief period of peace, again, I’m bombarded with scrupulosity. Please pray for me.
 
Saint Michael, the Archangel, defend us in battle.
Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil.
May God rebuke him, we humbly pray;
and do thou, O Prince of the heavenly host,
by the power of God
cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits
who prowl throughout the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.

Angel of God, my Guardian dear, to whom God’s love commits me here, ever this day be at my side, to light and guard, to rule and guide. Amen.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top