C
CarmeliteGirl25
Guest
Hi all,
I have been discerning the religious life for about 10 months now, and I am sure that God is calling me to be a sister/nun. I am including both terms because I am not sure if I am called to an active order, or the cloister. I am sure, from spending much time in prayer and Adoration, that I am called mainly to the Carmelites. This call was confirmed when I went on a vocation retreat last month to visit the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus in Kirkwood, MO. I love their apostolate and prayer life, and the fact that they are both active/contemplative. Unfortunately, I have been blocked from discerning with them further until I have been off my anti-depressants for at least a year. I hope that I can do this someday, if it’s God’s will for me.
I have contacted a few other orders, and was definitely turned down from one. I emailed them and received the answer to why I was turned down. Here’s the email in its entirety (the name has been shortened for privacy):
*Dear C,
Thank you for your email. You asked what was in your application to make us decide that your vocation was not to our Carmel. The reason is that you are currently on anti-depressants. We understand that you are getting off of them but one cannot be inclined to depression or melancholy in the Carmelite life or even have a history of it. This life is intense with long hours and much prayer. It requires a temperament that can bear under the intensity. We normally do not write the reasons for a refusal but, since you asked, we are responding to your request. In addition to prayer, asking the guidance of the Holy Spirit, our decision is based on many years of experience with many types of souls.
We do hope you will understand and will keep you in our prayers, C. May Our Blessed Mother be near you always.
In Her Immaculate Heart,
The Carmelite Sisters*
Now, I have not met these sisters, and I only emailed them once and they came to this conclusion. They know I have depression because they sent me a preliminary application and I filled it out. It included a section on health issues. This was with the Sisters of Carmel in Colorado Springs, CO. Which may be a good thing because I live in Florida, and becoming accustomed to life in Colorado would probably be difficult with snow and being so far away from my family.
So, I contacted another order I came across in Georgia called the Discalced Carmelite Nuns of the Blessed Virgin Mary of Mount Carmel. I received a email back from the Prioress, Sr. Joann, telling me about their admission requirements:
*I was advised by a priest that when applying I tell the truth but not overdo any thing until they get to know me. If it is not completely necessary to state when first applying to answer the questions, then it need not be said. However, before final acceptance it should be mentioned and explained. This is easier and more meaningful to do in person rather than on paper. You have more of a chance to point out facts and answer questions immediately. Sometimes it is necessary to experience a person before truly making a judgment. Truth is important but sometimes when totally stated too soon it does exactly what happened to you. Some communities do not want to begin with anyone they think might not come to fruition. Other communities know that any type of depression would not work in their life style. It is not possible to accurately say what was the reason for their turning you down. You would have had to directly ask them since they are the only ones who know the real reason. But obviously the Lord did not want you there since you were turned down. He will direct you and you must be willing to accept what He chooses for you knowing that it is best and His will. He always leaves us free since He gave us free will. We may follow His will or make our own decisions and take their consequences.
We had an experience of someone entering. It was only after some serious illness that made the person stop taking the medication, we did not know she had, that we discovered the mental illness we had not been told about ever. She was bi-polar which you probably realize is much worse than simple depression. From what you said yours most likely may go away. Hers was a definite life illness that if known could have been controlled and possibly she would have made it with us. The lie, however, first and foremost caused her dismissal rather than the illness. So we are open to letting people come and experience our life. When they are honest and taking care of themselves that is what is important. Our life can be difficult in various ways but all life has its difficulties. We take medicine for so many things that may require it for life that your depression may not be any more serious than being diabetic and needing insulin, or medicine for arthritis, or many other things. We are all human and we must not forget that even though we are aiming at the divine.*
I have been discerning the religious life for about 10 months now, and I am sure that God is calling me to be a sister/nun. I am including both terms because I am not sure if I am called to an active order, or the cloister. I am sure, from spending much time in prayer and Adoration, that I am called mainly to the Carmelites. This call was confirmed when I went on a vocation retreat last month to visit the Carmelite Sisters of the Divine Heart of Jesus in Kirkwood, MO. I love their apostolate and prayer life, and the fact that they are both active/contemplative. Unfortunately, I have been blocked from discerning with them further until I have been off my anti-depressants for at least a year. I hope that I can do this someday, if it’s God’s will for me.
I have contacted a few other orders, and was definitely turned down from one. I emailed them and received the answer to why I was turned down. Here’s the email in its entirety (the name has been shortened for privacy):
*Dear C,
Thank you for your email. You asked what was in your application to make us decide that your vocation was not to our Carmel. The reason is that you are currently on anti-depressants. We understand that you are getting off of them but one cannot be inclined to depression or melancholy in the Carmelite life or even have a history of it. This life is intense with long hours and much prayer. It requires a temperament that can bear under the intensity. We normally do not write the reasons for a refusal but, since you asked, we are responding to your request. In addition to prayer, asking the guidance of the Holy Spirit, our decision is based on many years of experience with many types of souls.
We do hope you will understand and will keep you in our prayers, C. May Our Blessed Mother be near you always.
In Her Immaculate Heart,
The Carmelite Sisters*
Now, I have not met these sisters, and I only emailed them once and they came to this conclusion. They know I have depression because they sent me a preliminary application and I filled it out. It included a section on health issues. This was with the Sisters of Carmel in Colorado Springs, CO. Which may be a good thing because I live in Florida, and becoming accustomed to life in Colorado would probably be difficult with snow and being so far away from my family.
So, I contacted another order I came across in Georgia called the Discalced Carmelite Nuns of the Blessed Virgin Mary of Mount Carmel. I received a email back from the Prioress, Sr. Joann, telling me about their admission requirements:
*I was advised by a priest that when applying I tell the truth but not overdo any thing until they get to know me. If it is not completely necessary to state when first applying to answer the questions, then it need not be said. However, before final acceptance it should be mentioned and explained. This is easier and more meaningful to do in person rather than on paper. You have more of a chance to point out facts and answer questions immediately. Sometimes it is necessary to experience a person before truly making a judgment. Truth is important but sometimes when totally stated too soon it does exactly what happened to you. Some communities do not want to begin with anyone they think might not come to fruition. Other communities know that any type of depression would not work in their life style. It is not possible to accurately say what was the reason for their turning you down. You would have had to directly ask them since they are the only ones who know the real reason. But obviously the Lord did not want you there since you were turned down. He will direct you and you must be willing to accept what He chooses for you knowing that it is best and His will. He always leaves us free since He gave us free will. We may follow His will or make our own decisions and take their consequences.
We had an experience of someone entering. It was only after some serious illness that made the person stop taking the medication, we did not know she had, that we discovered the mental illness we had not been told about ever. She was bi-polar which you probably realize is much worse than simple depression. From what you said yours most likely may go away. Hers was a definite life illness that if known could have been controlled and possibly she would have made it with us. The lie, however, first and foremost caused her dismissal rather than the illness. So we are open to letting people come and experience our life. When they are honest and taking care of themselves that is what is important. Our life can be difficult in various ways but all life has its difficulties. We take medicine for so many things that may require it for life that your depression may not be any more serious than being diabetic and needing insulin, or medicine for arthritis, or many other things. We are all human and we must not forget that even though we are aiming at the divine.*
uch
, but their monastery calls to me!
I’ve only persevered though because the Lord has graced me with persistence. I refuse to give up just because one community says “no.” There are so many of them, that I am willing to apply to all of them until I get an answer somewhere. Hopefully, since Savannah Carmel has already said yes, I won’t have to do that.
I’m often feel unhappy about my age, but I believe there still is a chance for me to become dominican. I’m so unhappy that I can’t join the congregation of S.Sisto I always adored (they present in St.Petersburg where I live) - they have age limit of 28!