Vow Renewal Question

[FairyMagdelaine]

I have no idea about the RCC’s view on vow renewals. I’m only married 5 months and I got married in the Church. I was proud of my choice, and honestly felt like I really had no other choice…but still, there was a teeny tiny part of me that dreamt about a Disney World wedding. I’ve always balked at vow renewals…but I was just wondering. If we’re still into Disney 10 or 20 years from now, would it be inappropriate to engage in a Disney World vow renewal ceremony? I’m kind of embarrassed to ask, but I figured you’d be the ppl to ask. TIA!!

 

[Marie]

We have World Marriage day and our diocese honors marriages every year. It is a big celebration in the Cathedral for those married 50 + years. I think it is wonderful. We also celebrate Marriage Day in our parish and all married couples are invited to stand and receive the blessing during the Mass on that day.

It may not be a Disney World theme (thank goodness) but it is wonderful to celebrate together and we do it up right. We have a large reception after the last Mass, with displays of wedding photos our parishioners bring of their weddings. We even have a Large wedding cake. It is a popular theme in our Dioceses anyway. Everyone shares the memories and the Joy of their vows with the whole parish. Those married just a few months to those married as long as 60+ years celebrate Marriage in a blessed and spectacular way. You may want to see what your parish does on World Marriage Sunday or suggest they begin doing so. It’s usually in Febr. as I recall. Perfect month…Valentines Day.

 

[FairyMagdelaine]

Whoops, I guess I should clarify…I was looking to renew the vows AT Disney World, in Orlando.

Marie:

It may not be a Disney World theme (thank goodness) .

Thanks for the jab.

 

[Debbie]

FairyMagdelaine:

I have no idea about the RCC’s view on vow renewals. I’m only married 5 months and I got married in the Church. I was proud of my choice, and honestly felt like I really had no other choice…but still, there was a teeny tiny part of me that dreamt about a Disney World wedding. I’ve always balked at vow renewals…but I was just wondering. If we’re still into Disney 10 or 20 years from now, would it be inappropriate to engage in a Disney World vow renewal ceremony? I’m kind of embarrassed to ask, but I figured you’d be the ppl to ask. TIA!!

Dear FairyMagdelaine,

Remember that Marriage is a Sacrament. :bible1: Perhaps it would be more in keeping with the importance of the event to have your vows renewed in a Catholic church (find a beautiful one in the Orlando area), THEN going to DisneyWorld for a “second honeymoon.” :dancing:

AMDG

Debbie

 

[T.A.Stobie_SFO]

I personally consider Vow Renewal as somewhat contradictory to the sacrament.

Covenant Marriage vows last until death. They do not need to (and shouldn’t in my opinon) be renewed as they do not expire.

Renewed Blessings on the Marriage I do approve of.

Just my :twocents:

 

[Marie]

FairyMagdelaine:

Whoops, I guess I should clarify…I was looking to renew the vows AT Disney World, in Orlando.

Thanks for the jab.

Magdelaine,

It was not intended as a jab. I did not realize you were actually talking about having it done at Disney World. I thought perhaps there was some sort of Marriage Day celebration Disney World has going that you were refering to, not actual ceremonies. That is all. It was not a critizism of your idea.

As to renewal, your vows are a sacrament,so they don’t need renewed, just as you do not need to be re-baptised, or re confirmed. But going to Disney World to celebrate your anniversary would be a nice thing. I think all couples should renew their love for each other each day, by sharing time alone together. And a vacation to celebrate would be wonderful.

Marriage is not always easy, nor fun, nor romantic but it is wonderful when spouses remember their vows and live them with Joy. We need to always remember to take time to renew our love for our spouses each and every day. That is how strong marrages grow into great vocations of true love.

God Bless,
Marie

 

[Marie]

PS: I like to point out the good the bad and the ugly…As I have been married 40+ years, I know it can seem boring and mundane. No matter the cost, marriage is worth all the trouble and sorrows you will face. As long as you keep a sense of humor and forgive one another daily, (sometimes hourly) it will thrive and grow.

My husband and I have a ritual joke which came from our first turbulent years of marriage.

One day he got in a snit about something or other and so did I. The unkind words started flying and then he poped off: “Well, if thats the way you feel about it we will just get a divorce!” To which I replied: “Oh! NO we won’t buster! This marriage is for life! One of us has to die and it’s NOT going to be me…capish?”

For some silly reason it made us both crack up laughing and the fight ended with us rolling on the floor like little kids giggling and teasing with renewed love and joy. We have made it a habit since that day to try and remember that when we get angry with one another. Humor works wonders.

 

[OhioBob]

Debbie:

Dear FairyMagdelaine,

Remember that Marriage is a Sacrament. :bible1: Perhaps it would be more in keeping with the importance of the event to have your vows renewed in a Catholic church (find a beautiful one in the Orlando area), THEN going to DisneyWorld for a “second honeymoon.” :dancing:

AMDG

Debbie

I don’t think that the church takes issue with a couple who chosses to renew their marriage vows. Obviously the original vows are for life when the couple enters into the sacrament. Renewals seem to be more often a sort of public recommitment to each other. To the extent that they help a couple to keep their marriage strong, I don’t see why it would be a problem, whether it happened in a church, Disney World, cruise ship, or anywhere else. Maybe even in the privacy of the home.

In a sense, each act of intimacy in marriage is a renewal of the marriage vows. So why would it be wrong do do it publicly (the vows, not the intimacy )? Even if Mickey, Tigger and Pooh were watching.

Coincidently, today at Mass there was a general renewal of vows at the end of Mass (during the announcement period, right before the final blessing) for all the married couples in attendance. It was a diocesan event approved by the bishop. The couples renewed their vows before the congregation and received a blessing. I thought it was rather nice.

Too bad my wife wasn’t there (she had to work today so we went to mass yesterday as well). I had nobody to renew my vows with.

Oh well, I sent them her way anyway via prayer.

 

[Marie]

OhioBob:

I don’t think that the church takes issue with a couple who chosses to renew their marriage vows. Obviously the original vows are for life when the couple enters into the sacrament. Renewals seem to be more often a sort of public recommitment to each other.

Your right Bob. It is the Symantec’s I think we are all confusing here. The church does vow renewals for many couples celebrating anniversaries or general for all married couples. It is not a new marriage ceremony, just an affirmation and acknowledgement of the original vows. I think the idea is stellar as I already mentioned. The church certainly does too.

I think we were/are trying to understand what exactly Magdelaine means…not criticize her idea. I think it is a great one. Glad you caught your blessing for your wife. Deliver it in person now with a big hug tonight.

 

[amyjo10]

That’s a great idea! And my fiance and I will be doing a vow renewal after we get married.

We will be married in the Church because we realize it is a sacrament and we want to honor God and each other. But a lot of my family will not be able to be there because they live on the opposite coast. We’re going to renew our vows so that my family can feel included, and we probably won’t do that in a church because we recognize the life-long commitment and oath that is marriage.

Long story short: pray about it. The Roman Catholic Church has not specifically said that it would be sinful to renew your vows. If you ask God to lead you, and live your life to be in communion with Him, he will give you peace. If you ask for wisdom and really think about your choice, you won’t stumble.

God Bless!

 

[Irish_Girl_68]

I think it’s a lovely idea! My husband and I have been married 15 years and just renewed our vows. Our sacramental wedding was a disaster! My husband ran a fever of 102 and threw up 15 minutes before I walked down the aisle. We got through the ceremony (fastest Nuptial Mass I’ve ever been to), cut the cake at the reception and left. I put him to bed at home and wrote thank you notes the rest of the evening. I can laugh about it now, but I was devastated at the time. We spoke with our pastor who said a vow renewal has no binding power so anyone could perform the ceremony. We had the ceremony performed at a gazebo/rose garden of a local hotel. My husband’s best friend is a non-denominational minister so he asked us to recite our vows and our children were the “witnesses.” It was beautiful and memorable. We’d do it again in a second

 

[joandarc2008]

My mother and father came up on their thirty years. My mother asked my father if he wanted to renew their vows. My father looked at her and said I didn’t know they expired. She said they didn’t but do you want to renew them - he then said I don’t know do I get another bachelor party. The vows were not renewed.

 

[lizaanne]

Too bad my wife wasn’t there (she had to work today so we went to mass yesterday as well). I had nobody to renew my vows with.

Oh well, I sent them her way anyway via prayer.

Two become one - even though she wasn’t physically there with you, she was there as being a part of you.

Congratulations!

I like it when they do this at Mass - it is the public recognition of the Sacrament which I think is a good example to others.

~Liza

 

[Consecrated]

I personally consider Vow Renewal as somewhat contradictory to the sacrament.

Covenant Marriage vows last until death. They do not need to (and shouldn’t in my opinon) be renewed as they do not expire.

Renewed Blessings on the Marriage I do approve of.

Just my :twocents:

We renew our baptismal vows every year at Easter. Reaffirming your intentions is not the same as saying that the vows “expire”.

 

[Seatuck]

Catholics can renew their vows any day that they wish- in the marital act. I don’t recommend inviting guests or doing it in a public place.