Waiting for confession

  • Thread starter Thread starter rayray81
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
R

rayray81

Guest
I don’t mean to knock anyone’s method of celebrating this excellent sacrament, and I don’t want to come across as selfish.

At the church I attend confession is heard on a weekly bases on Saturday afternoons about 2 hours before the Saturday evening mass. Generally there is a decent sized line so if you show up late you should be prepared to wait. What my problem is, is that despite this fact their are a handful of people that take almost a half hour in the confessional.

Now I wouldn’t mind if these people were lapsed catholics who were coming back to the church after 20-30 years. Then it would make sense, but these are people that are there week after week, and it is always the same thing. Don’t they realize their are like 10-15 people behind them in line and their is only 2 hours until the priest has to say mass?

Whew! Am I glad I got that off my chest! Thanks for listening.
 
40.png
rayray81:
I don’t mean to knock anyone’s method of celebrating this excellent sacrament, and I don’t want to come across as selfish.

At the church I attend confession is heard on a weekly bases on Saturday afternoons about 2 hours before the Saturday evening mass. Generally there is a decent sized line so if you show up late you should be prepared to wait. What my problem is, is that despite this fact their are a handful of people that take almost a half hour in the confessional.

Now I wouldn’t mind if these people were lapsed catholics who were coming back to the church after 20-30 years. Then it would make sense, but these are people that are there week after week, and it is always the same thing. Don’t they realize their are like 10-15 people behind them in line and their is only 2 hours until the priest has to say mass?

Whew! Am I glad I got that off my chest! Thanks for listening.
Click to expand...
Maybe it’s just God’s way of teaching someone patience and humility.
 
Confession involves two people – the confessor and the penetent.

We must recognize the sacrament was created for the benefit of the penetent. Under Canon law, the penetent has a right to pastoral guidance and service.

Similarly, the confessor has a duty to examine the penetent – it is his responsibility, after all to grant or withhold absolution.

So we cannot fault those who take extra time in confession – it is their right on the one hand, and may be the confessor’s duty both to listen and serve, as well as to ask questions.

We must leave it up to the pastor and the confessor to decide what to do if a confession runs too long – delay services, suggest another session, or something else.
 
I experience the same thing at my Parish. On Thursdays we have Confession from 3.30 - 6.30pm. I don’t get home from work until about 5pm and then head down for confession. We have a few people who actually go week after week and spend 30mins no problem in the confessional. Very selfish move (although not a deliberate one) especially when there is a queue and they know the queue is long. Scrupulosity I would say is to blame.

It seems as if they are making personal property out of the Priest. When this happens I always enter the confessional and say to the Priest that I am aware there is a big queue and will not delay. He is always grateful.

The Holy Father has also mentioned not using the confessional as a place of counselling but as a place of mercy and so confessions should not be unduly prolonged. I will find the actual document later can’t seem to find it now.
Ahhhhh! Found it. Popes letter to Priests Holy Thursday 2001 2001Pope John Paul II’s LetterHolyThursday and again in 2002 2002LetterHolyThursday !
 
Counseling in the confessional should be brief and to the point. I forget the terms but there is a word to describe meeting with the priest to discuss matters, and this can occur outside of the confessional. The priest should be more assertive, in my opinion, and ask penitents what other sins they have committed, and hustle them along keeping them focused on their sins and on apologizing. The priest should always move to the point of, where is the sin, and is the penitent sorry. This if the penitent shows no particular sign of moving along. It shouldn’t be necessary to be brusque, but keep in mind that the shepherd can’t spend all day waiting for a given sheep to safely graze. There are other sheep to take care of too, and sometimes one needs a wee boot. There is mercy in telling people to hurry up when they are being slow, thinking in unnecessary ways, and making others wait. That said, these may be women you’re talking about, and they may be asking about their children and grandchildren. I’ve heard this happens. It should be done outside of the confessional by appointment, ideally.
 
When I came back into the Church after a 15 year lapse, I had some serious sins to confess. I needed an understanding and compassionate confessor. It took me nearly a year of going to Mass to gain the faith and courage to enter the confessional.

I went on a Saturday scheduled confession time. Unless in dire need, I will never do so again. I was literally weeping under the weight of my sins and the priest was “hurrying me along”. I could barely choke out my confession and I was being gently, but oh so obviously moved along.

Since then I have always made an appointment for confession. I have never felt rushed in the format.

Peace,
Chad
 
In my search to find a good confessor, I went to Confession in many different parishes for a while. In several, there were signs that said something about not taking a long time and the confessional is no place for spiritual direction (please make an appointment)…or words to that effect. I was very put off by those signs but I understand the need for brevity if there is a long line waiting outside. My impression was that some priests are so bent on getting you in and out as quickly as possible, I wasn’t even sure it was a valid confession (I have had priests not ask for my Act of Confession or give me a penance). I had one priest yell at me because he thought I was seeking spiritual direction. I was amazed at his rudeness. I told him I was actually trying to explain my sin so he’d understand, which I was.

Most of my experiences have been positive. I have found priests who give a bit of spiritual direction and are compassionate and kind. They are the ones I seek out for Confession.

By the way, Confession is a marvelous gift to us. I rediscovered the sacrament about a year ago, after having been away from it for a very long time. To know with certainty that my sins have been forgiven and to receive the graces inherent within the sacrament has been a wondrous blessing in my life. I am very blessed to have this sacrament available every single day where I live and work. And, to be able to attend Mass everyday is the best of all.
 
We are not talking of those who wish to make a sincere and thorough confession. We are talking about those who will galdly spend 20 - 30 mins every week in the confessional during public confession time.

Sure we are to take it very seriously and there is the other extreme but what I feel we are griping about is the fact that week after week 20 - 30 min confessions are the norm.

One week we could suddenly hear the woman in the confessional going through a list of what she had bought in Knock and how many she had there to give to the Priest and how many she would bring for him next week etc. etc. Very embarrasing for us seeing that she was speaking inside the confessional at full force and ruffling plastic bags as she searched through them obviously displaying to the Priest her wares.

I just fear that the Confessional at times is abused in both ways. But ‘hogging’ the confessional is not a good idea.
 
rayray81 be thankful you have a regular time for confession at your parish. Out here in " liberal diocese USA " one is fortunate if the local parish has regular confessions at all! :eek: The parish I attend has confessions from 3:30 PM to 4 PM on Saturday afternoons only, and if nothing else in the church is going on. On top of that, your only choice is to go “face to face”. The confessionals have been removed. The pastor would prefer that an appointment be made instead of scheduling regular times for this Sacrament.

Needless to say, many folks look to go else where for confession. A 30 minute drive is not unheard of. Thankfully I live only an hour away from the National Shrine of the Divine Mercy, which has confessions scheduled for 2 hours a day, every day.

I pray frequently that long lines show up at my parish, then maybe our pastor will “open” his eyes.:gopray:

In His Peace!
 
We have Confession here in our Parish on

Thursday from 3.30pm - 6.30pm
Fridays after 7.30pm Mass
Saturday after 10am Mass until 12pm
Saturday in our second Church after 11am Mass until 12pm.
Saturday after 6.30pm Mass until 8pm.
Suppose I am very grateful for the opportunity to be so free to have a selection of times.
 
40.png
Sir_Hubert:
rayray81 be thankful you have a regular time for confession at your parish. Out here in " liberal diocese USA " one is fortunate if the local parish has regular confessions at all! :eek: The parish I attend has confessions from 3:30 PM to 4 PM on Saturday afternoons only, and if nothing else in the church is going on. On top of that, your only choice is to go “face to face”. The confessionals have been removed. The pastor would prefer that an appointment be made instead of scheduling regular times for this Sacrament.

Needless to say, many folks look to go else where for confession. A 30 minute drive is not unheard of. Thankfully I live only an hour away from the National Shrine of the Divine Mercy, which has confessions scheduled for 2 hours a day, every day.

I pray frequently that long lines show up at my parish, then maybe our pastor will “open” his eyes.:gopray:

In His Peace!
Click to expand...
I confronted my pastor last year when his assistant performed an illicit communal penance service during Advent. (The assistant admitted to me that it was illicit but that it was up to HIS conscience, not mine…I had gone to him because I had played the piano for it, not realizing beforehand that he was not going to give anyone opportunity for private confessions within the service. I concluded that he thought he was better than God…or maybe he was playing God.) The pastor declared that it’s been tradition for 40 years in this parish to have communal penance services held just as it was done and so it was just fine…they were being “pastoral” in doing it that way, according to him. I was appalled…they had just taught our congregation that they didn’t have to make a private confession (which is false teaching) and that, by merely being at that penance service, their sins were forgiven (WRONG). I refused to ever again participate in any such service. I HAVE heard that the archbishop here has FINALLY put a stop to these illicit affairs. My parish did not have a penance service this year so maybe THEY are finally listening to the Church teaching on this matter, too. In my discussion with the pastor, he reminded me that, at our parish, we have the opportunity for private confession 52 times a year…From 9:30 to 10:30 every Saturday morning after the 9 AM Mass. (Confession after Mass makes no sense to me. People in mortal sin cannot participate in the Eucharist and, after Confession, the most glorious gift is to be able to receive our Lord at Mass.) At the time of our discussion, I didn’t know about the parishes I have discovered since then that have private confessions every single day before the morning Mass, Monday through Saturday, and by appointment. That translates to a minimum of 312 times or 624 times in some parishes where there are two morning masses. My parish has 3 priests…the one that has 312 times has one priest. 3 priests, 52 times a year versus 1 priest 312 times a year. One of the priests at my parish (the one who did the illicit service) yelled at me once for coming to Confession because he thought he was done with hearing confessions and he had things he had to do. (I had arrived just before a penitent was finished with his confession…Father had locked the outside door, apparently to ensure he’d be done. This was at 9:50…40 minutes shy of the hour the pastor had told me they did.) I told him I had a key so I let myself in and, besides, it was important to me to go to Confession. He did soften after that but it still was a terrible thing to experience. That was NOT hospitality at its finest. Needless to say, I go to the 1 priest for Confession…and he ALWAYS welcomes me and cheers my progress in my goal toward sainthood.
 
Confessions of 20 to 30 minutes on a* weekly * basis is nearly beyond my comprehension.

Sins don’t require a lot of explanation. Just state them. Saying an act of contrition takes only a few seconds, as does absolution. So what’s the holdup?

On weekdays we have confessions for 25 minutes before Mass, and often I’ve seen 10 to 20 people go through the line. So that’s one or two minutes per confession, without rushing, especially for weekly penitents.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top