Walked out of Mass

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Lucky7

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Hi,

My husband and I walked out of Mass the other day because we thought that the priest’s joking around (hard to explain) went ovr the line and we thought it was disrespectful. We just couldn’t sit through the circus. Since we were out of town and I was very upset at the time, we didn’t go to a different parish. Do I need to confess this? It bothers me but I also feel that staying at that Mass could have been sinful.

Thanks,
 
Lucky7 said:
Hi,

My husband and I walked out of Mass the other day because we thought that the priest’s joking around (hard to explain) went ovr the line and we thought it was disrespectful. We just couldn’t sit through the circus. Since we were out of town and I was very upset at the time, we didn’t go to a different parish. Do I need to confess this? It bothers me but I also feel that staying at that Mass could have been sinful.

Thanks,
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While I really, really sympathize, I think the better part would have been had you two walked out into the lobby for a minute or two, taken a deep breath, ‘offered it up’, and returned, focusing on the Eucharist.

It is possible that the emotional upset could be a legitimate reason for you to have to leave. After all, you did intend to come and you tried to stay. Still, I think that TELLING your priest what happened (in the confessional setting) is necessary. Some would say that if you weren’t SURE you might be committing sin you didn’t commit it, but again, that’s why you see your priest to know for sure.

Thing is, if you stayed it ‘could have’ been sinful. . .but in leaving, you are in the SAME situation as it could have been’ sinful as well. You’ll never know about the first as you left, but you CAN, and probably should, for your peace of mind, talk to the priest and know about the second.
 
Actually I was asking the OP and you very rudely posted before me!😛
 
AdamPeter said:
Thanks sherlock… 😉

I meant in what context did he bring the joking into “Sunday mass”?
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I actaully can’t remember specific comments. He was doing some RCIA stuff at the beginning of the mass and said something along the lines of “Who’s that knocking at the door?” wrt I guess the candidates and their sponsors waiting to process in. The whole congregation thought that was funny. Agian, hard to remember all of the joking (because it wasn’t just one comment…if it was I probably would have stayed and moved on). All I could do was look at my husband and say, “Are you kidding me?”. I struggled with it, but in the end I had to leave.
 
Lucky7 said:
Hi,

My husband and I walked out of Mass the other day because we thought that the priest’s joking around (hard to explain) went ovr the line and we thought it was disrespectful. We just couldn’t sit through the circus. Since we were out of town and I was very upset at the time, we didn’t go to a different parish. Do I need to confess this? It bothers me but I also feel that staying at that Mass could have been sinful.

Thanks,
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Just because you thought that it does not mean the priest crossed the line or was disrespectful. In being so judgemental and walking out of Mass it sounds like you were the disrespectful people.
 
Tantum_ergo said:
While I really, really sympathize, I think the better part would have been had you two walked out into the lobby for a minute or two, taken a deep breath, ‘offered it up’, and returned, focusing on the Eucharist.

It is possible that the emotional upset could be a legitimate reason for you to have to leave. After all, you did intend to come and you tried to stay. Still, I think that TELLING your priest what happened (in the confessional setting) is necessary. Some would say that if you weren’t SURE you might be committing sin you didn’t commit it, but again, that’s why you see your priest to know for sure.

Thing is, if you stayed it ‘could have’ been sinful. . .but in leaving, you are in the SAME situation as it could have been’ sinful as well. You’ll never know about the first as you left, but you CAN, and probably should, for your peace of mind, talk to the priest and know about the second.
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I hear you. Thank you.
 
thistle said:
Just because you thought that it does not mean the priest crossed the line or was disrespectful. In being so judgemental and walking out of Mass it sounds like you were the disrespectful people.
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I kinda expected a response like this and maybe you’re right. It’s just that there have been other times when priests have made a joke (say as part of the homily) and I was fine with it. This time just seemed so different to me…it came across as making a mockery of the mass.
 
Lucky7 said:
I actaully can’t remember specific comments. He was doing some RCIA stuff at the beginning of the mass and said something along the lines of “Who’s that knocking at the door?” wrt I guess the candidates and their sponsors waiting to process in. The whole congregation thought that was funny. Agian, hard to remember all of the joking (because it wasn’t just one comment…if it was I probably would have stayed and moved on). All I could do was look at my husband and say, “Are you kidding me?”. I struggled with it, but in the end I had to leave.
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That hardly can be classified as inappropriate or something that necessitates leaving Mass.

I really think it deserves some introspection, possibly with help from your priest.
 
With the RCIA he is dealing with people who are not yet fully catechized, and who may be nervous and unsure about themselves, and possibly terrified of being called up and standing in front of everyone while they get blessed and then sent off to study the Word.

He was probably trying to make them feel at ease.

Seems like an appropriate time to make a joke: and “Who’s that knocking at the door?” sounds entirely appropriate, 'cos they are in fact knocking at the door, but have not yet entered.

BTW Lucky7

be aware that when you ask for opinions on a forum on whether you’ve done something “wrong” you will get a ton of people saying that you have.

Read them all with a pinch of salt. Only you know the true story. Perhaps there is a kernal of truth somewhere in one of our posts.

It’s best just to talk to your priest and not get too hung up on what we say.
 
1ke said:
That hardly can be classified as inappropriate or something that necessitates leaving Mass.

I really think it deserves some introspection, possibly with help from your priest.
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Like I said, it wasn’t just one thing…and yes, i still say the level of joviality was inappropriate.
 
You have a wide range of response here and I really have learned something for myself too. If I ever have the urge to leave Mass in response to something that I don’t like, I will force myself to refocus and remind myself why I am there, the Eucharist.
 
I am reminded of the story of St. Francis of Assisi, when he was in his last days. He was blind, cripple, could hardly walk, etc. A particular parish priest was “shacked up” with this woman, giving a bad example for the whole community. In anger, they went to St. Francis to come “straighten out” this bad priest! He hobbled over there, with the crowd in back of him, and knocked on the door. The priest came to the door, with the woman standing behind him. The crowed was waiting, anxiously, to see St. Francis really give this priest what he had coming to him. Instead, St. Francis knelt and kissed the priest’s hands, saying, “These hands bring me Jesus!” (Meaning the Eucharist.) The priest, by that act, was humbled, straightened out his life, and became a good priest once again.
 
I confess here (and have confessed, indeed) that I did feel compelled to leave Mass once, as the sign of peace was being offered. Let’s just say without the details that many of you would have been equally shocked by the events of the moment.

That said, it is still Mass, and I ended up feeling guilty about it, and felt it a proper matter for confession (after all, it is Sunday obligation).
 
Scoobyshme said:
I am reminded of the story of St. Francis of Assisi, when he was in his last days. He was blind, cripple, could hardly walk, etc. A particular parish priest was “shacked up” with this woman, giving a bad example for the whole community. In anger, they went to St. Francis to come “straighten out” this bad priest! He hobbled over there, with the crowd in back of him, and knocked on the door. The priest came to the door, with the woman standing behind him. The crowed was waiting, anxiously, to see St. Francis really give this priest what he had coming to him. Instead, St. Francis knelt and kissed the priest’s hands, saying, “These hands bring me Jesus!” (Meaning the Eucharist.) The priest, by that act, was humbled, straightened out his life, and became a good priest once again.
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👍
 
The Monsignor at my parish will make little jokes that are quite funny, but not planned… spur of the moment when something catches him. I adore his quick wit.

There are lots of times something will bother me that normally wouldn’t and if I look at my attitude, it’s something in me, not the other person. Maybe you were having a bad day.

One of my favorite wallet pictures is one of Jesus laughing. Maybe He would be laughing along with the priest.
 
I can’t imagine staying at Mass ever being sinful. As such, that would be my default position. Even if the priest is introducing all sorts of craziness, that’s on him, not the faithful who are there to fulfill their obligation.

Unless the priest is doing something that would conclusively invalidate the Mass, I wouldn’t recommend walking out (especially without a game plan to go to another Mass).

That said, you certainly cannot change it now. I would bring it up to my priest in Confession, though. I know that, in the heat of the (awkward) moment, it could be easy to do such a thing. I’m sure your priest could give you good counsel on how to handle such situations in the future.
 
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