Was it ok to go home?

[Kathrin]

Caught between being too hard on myself and too lenient on myself, I stood at the train station, wondering: Is it ok to just take the train home?

Do you know thehungersite.com and other websites like that, where you can by just a mouseclick donate free food, and the sponsers pay for it because you view their banners?
Well, I usually do it at home and lso when I am at a library, because they count one click per computer.

Today I got off work and went to a library, and I wanted to go to mass later in the evening and had some time in between. I have a bad cold so I told myself, better not stress around too much, maybe wait where it’s warm… and not go to the other library.
I told myself well if I don’t go to the other library I’ll do another click at a little store at the station, it only costs a few coins to use the computer there.

Turns out I spent much more time outside in the cold than I wanted to, talking to a homeless girl I have been trying to help.
Didn’t make it to mass either.
Got back to the station and wanted to go to the store and do the free food etc clicks.
And the store was closed for remodeling.

Now the library would have been open until 8pm I think. It was 7. I wavered. Had I PROMISED to do another click? And if yes, to myself? Or maybe to God? I talk to God about such things, so probably I did say it to Him.
I went to the bus stop. I would have had to wait. I have a cough. It was getting late. I wanted to get home.
I wanted to talk to God about it.
I kind of thought, God can’t be that hard on me? When I am sick already? Sure He would let me just go home? Maybe I can do an extra click another time, or donate the coins I would have spent. I didn’t expect the store to be closed, so that changed the situation.

I tried one more place for possible internet access and then I took the train home.

Do you think that was ok?

Kathrin

 

[Kathrin]

'k. I admit. That was my too-tender conscience again.

 

[Marycruz]

You were sick. It was definitely ok. If you don’t take care of yourself, you might miss much more opportunities to help the people around you.

Don’t torture yourself just because of an extra click, you’ll be able to click a thousand more times in the future Plus it’s already great that you think of doing it from different computers everyday, most people never even bother. And remember that it’s not the only way to help. You didn’t click today, but maybe tomorrow you’ll do something else

 

[PhilotheaZ]

Do you know how much money is being donated for your “click”?

I saw one website that provides 20 grains of rice for each click. (I am assuming that this is typical.)

A grain of rice weighs about 25 miligrams. It would take about 900 clicks to provide a pound of rice.

You can buy rice in bulk for less than a dollar a pound.

You said you are paying a “few coins” to use a computer to make your “click.” So if you are paying more than a dollar for 900 clicks, you are wasting your money.

You should only do this if using the computer costs you nothing and does not take you out of your way. Your money and time would be better spent by donating directly to a good charity.

There, now you can go directly home each day, save the coins you would have wasted buying computer time, and use the money where it will do more good (perhaps to buy something needed by that homeless girl?). And NO MORE GUILT, promise?

[Oops! I just noticed that you live in Switzerland. Maybe it would have made more sense to figure it in kilograms and Swiss francs, but you get the picture.]

 

[yinekka]

Kathrin, you seem to think of God as someone waiting to catch you doing something wrong. God is your loving Father. Would a loving Father want His child to get sicker? Don’t use God as an excuse to beat up on yourself. If this mouse click thing is causing you so much anxiety maybe you should stop doing it altogether and find another way of being charitable; a way which will not cause you to become anxious.

 

[Kathrin]

You said you are paying a “few coins” to use a computer to make your “click.” So if you are paying more than a dollar for 900 clicks, you are wasting your money.

Well, that was at that store that was closed down.
If I go to the library to click it doesn’t cost me anything extra. Just time.

There, now you can go directly home each day, save the coins you would have wasted buying computer time,

I have done that before. If I didn’t make it to click, put some coins in a container. Save them up for the next time I encounter a “your leftover change can save a child’s life” envelope on a trip.

Usually though ti was just a wonderful free thing to do, especially during the times when my budget was less than 20 dollars a week.

Kathrin

 

[Kathrin]

I think it was more about having TOLD MYSELF I would than about missing the click.
Even now I am wondering, didn’t I tell myself if I can’t click yesterday I’ll run around to still another place today to make up for it?
And if yes, did I promise that to God?

But if I intend to do something out of a compulsion, and later decide it’s not necessary, is that still a broken “promise”?

(Anyway, I donated 10 dollars online yesterday to some food aid program or something, from the money I still have on my American account.) So I think I made zup for it by far…

 

[Kathrin]

Do you know how much money is being donated for your “click”?

I saw one website that provides 20 grains of rice for each click. (I am assuming that this is typical.)

The Hunger Site donates the value of 1.1 cups of food per click.

 

[John_Russell_Jr]

Hi, your hearts in the right place for sure. Like all of us maybe you should pray for guidance how best to help others. Maybe God will show you a way that will do even more good than your doing now. God bless.