Was told that I was sinning because of my body type

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An aunt who used to be Catholic is now some sort of Christian (she never responds to which religion she is) told me that because God gave me a curvier figure with large chest and rear that I am making a mortal sin every time I leave the house. I always try to dress modestly, but there is not much you can do to hide a large rear and chest. She told me that blouses that are fitted at the waist: i.e. cup under a woman’s breasts are immodest. That wearing leggings even with skirts is immodest, and that camisoles with lace edging are immodest because it looks like lingerie, and that shrugs/boleros that only cover a woman’s chest are the worst. The only thing I could think of wearing is a floor length wide skirt with an extra large tunic that goes over the hips, even then it is easy to tell I have a large chest. I like to wear cape coats, but even than it looks like I might be pregnant rather than being well endowed (for that reason I usually leave them partly open). What are your thoughts on this. I am attaching links to two links to give you an idea of what I mean. God blessed and cursed me with a curvier figure (half of women say I am blessed, those who know what I mean agree I am cursed: mission impossible to find a jacket that fits.) https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/f2/89/7b/f2897b7e20ba2bfae682dd6eb19ba7db.jpg
http://www.befabblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/26/0/111-R-K-Originals-Short-Sleeve-Bolero-Sweater-for-Women-1.jpg
 
she is wrong its not sinful to be curvy that’s like saying your sinful because your Asian or black

don’t listen to her
you are fine the way God made you
 
GF Girl

There are grounds for suspecting that your aunt, every time she looks at you, is guilty of committing the sin of envy
 
GF_Girl said:
An aunt who used to be Catholic is now some sort of Christian (she never responds to which religion she is) told me that because God gave me a curvier figure with large chest and rear that I am making a mortal sin every time I leave the house. I always try to dress modestly, but there is not much you can do to hide a large rear and chest. She told me that blouses that are fitted at the waist: i.e. cup under a woman’s breasts are immodest. That wearing leggings even with skirts is immodest, and that camisoles with lace edging are immodest because it looks like lingerie, and that shrugs/boleros that only cover a woman’s chest are the worst. The only thing I could think of wearing is a floor length wide skirt with an extra large tunic that goes over the hips, even then it is easy to tell I have a large chest. I like to wear cape coats, but even than it looks like I might be pregnant rather than being well endowed (for that reason I usually leave them partly open). What are your thoughts on this. I am attaching links to two links to give you an idea of what I mean. God blessed and cursed me with a curvier figure (half of women say I am blessed, those who know what I mean agree I am cursed: mission impossible to find a jacket that fits.) https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/f2/89/7b/f2897b7e20ba2bfae682dd6eb19ba7db.jpg
http://www.befabblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/26/0/111-R-K-Originals-Short-Sleeve-Bolero-Sweater-for-Women-1.jpg
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The apologetics side of me wants you to ask your aunt where she is getting the information supporting her beliefs. Tell her that you appreciate her (name removed by moderator)ut but that you don’t want to take just her word for it. Ask her for references where she is getting these thoughts.

See where that takes her? To the bible? To the Catechism? To some article on-line?

You can then use her source, if there is one, to have more dialogue as to why there is no issue with your dress.

(Then you can tell her that there are three requirements for a sin to be mortal)
 
GF_Girl said:
An aunt who used to be Catholic is now some sort of Christian (she never responds to which religion she is) told me that because God gave me a curvier figure with large chest and rear that I am making a mortal sin every time I leave the house.
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So she claims to be a Christian, and she can’t even tell you where she got these interesting opinions? Isn’t that just cute? I’d like to see her quote “camisoles” or “boleros” in Scripture.

It is true that American fashion, especially for women, does tend to be immodest. It’s showy and all. But that doesn’t mean you personally are immodest if you don’t follow your aunt’s arbitrary guidelines. (And from what I can tell, there’s nothing ipso facto immodest about a bolero or camisole:rolleyes:.)

Why are you concerned about what she says, anyway?
 
Modesty is a virtue that anyone can put into practice. There is no one for whom it is impossible simply because of their body type.

I think you already know that your aunt is not correct here. But if you need reassurance, I’ll tell you, No, you are not sinning simply by having the body that God gave you.
 
GF_Girl said:
An aunt who used to be Catholic is now some sort of Christian (she never responds to which religion she is) told me that because God gave me a curvier figure with large chest and rear that I am making a mortal sin every time I leave the house. I always try to dress modestly, but there is not much you can do to hide a large rear and chest. She told me that blouses that are fitted at the waist: i.e. cup under a woman’s breasts are immodest. That wearing leggings even with skirts is immodest, and that camisoles with lace edging are immodest because it looks like lingerie, and that shrugs/boleros that only cover a woman’s chest are the worst. The only thing I could think of wearing is a floor length wide skirt with an extra large tunic that goes over the hips, even then it is easy to tell I have a large chest. I like to wear cape coats, but even than it looks like I might be pregnant rather than being well endowed (for that reason I usually leave them partly open). What are your thoughts on this. I am attaching links to two links to give you an idea of what I mean. God blessed and cursed me with a curvier figure (half of women say I am blessed, those who know what I mean agree I am cursed: mission impossible to find a jacket that fits.) https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/f2/89/7b/f2897b7e20ba2bfae682dd6eb19ba7db.jpg
http://www.befabblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/26/0/111-R-K-Originals-Short-Sleeve-Bolero-Sweater-for-Women-1.jpg
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I know some very petite women that have to wear tight fitting clothes because they honestly can’t wear anything else.
 
What your aunt said is wrong, but maybe she was hoping that saying it would keep you pure and safe.

Not all guys are attracted to curvy figures, and some guys would get lustful thoughts seeing a woman in a trench coat over a potato sack.

It sounds like you are trying to be modest, and good for you. Guys who lust and objectify are the potential sinners here, not you.
 
GF_Girl said:
An aunt who used to be Catholic is now some sort of Christian (she never responds to which religion she is) told me that because God gave me a curvier figure with large chest and rear that I am making a mortal sin every time I leave the house. I always try to dress modestly, but there is not much you can do to hide a large rear and chest. She told me that blouses that are fitted at the waist: i.e. cup under a woman’s breasts are immodest. That wearing leggings even with skirts is immodest, and that camisoles with lace edging are immodest because it looks like lingerie, and that shrugs/boleros that only cover a woman’s chest are the worst. The only thing I could think of wearing is a floor length wide skirt with an extra large tunic that goes over the hips, even then it is easy to tell I have a large chest. I like to wear cape coats, but even than it looks like I might be pregnant rather than being well endowed (for that reason I usually leave them partly open). What are your thoughts on this. I am attaching links to two links to give you an idea of what I mean. God blessed and cursed me with a curvier figure (half of women say I am blessed, those who know what I mean agree I am cursed: mission impossible to find a jacket that fits.)
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As long as you aren’t wearing :
  • anything that makes the panties line visible
  • leggings without a long enough blouse to cover the butt
  • blouse that shows a little cleavage that gets worse by bending down
  • bra visible on the back or front
  • a white blouse with a non-white/non-nude color bra.
  • a button blouse without putting a pin or religious pin between the buttons (we tend to have an open space between buttons where the breasts are due to their size and it can make your breasts skin or bra visible to the one who can see you from a side angle).
 
Porknpie said:
The apologetics side of me wants you to ask your aunt where she is getting the information supporting her beliefs. Tell her that you appreciate her (name removed by moderator)ut but that you don’t want to take just her word for it. Ask her for references where she is getting these thoughts.

See where that takes her? To the bible? To the Catechism? To some article on-line?

You can then use her source, if there is one, to have more dialogue as to why there is no issue with your dress.

(Then you can tell her that there are three requirements for a sin to be mortal)
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She says that in the Bible it says that a woman should not dress like a man and that by wearing pants it is immodest and am provoking men. How pants (not talking about painted on jeans, but normal fitting pants) could provoke men if they are men’s garments. She says that when a woman shows her figure it provokes men and therefore immodest. She also told me that she since she cannot control her daughter, she needs to control me (her words).
 
TarkanAttila said:
So she claims to be a Christian, and she can’t even tell you where she got these interesting opinions? Isn’t that just cute? I’d like to see her quote “camisoles” or “boleros” in Scripture.

It is true that American fashion, especially for women, does tend to be immodest. It’s showy and all. But that doesn’t mean you personally are immodest if you don’t follow your aunt’s arbitrary guidelines. (And from what I can tell, there’s nothing ipso facto immodest about a bolero or camisole:rolleyes:.)

Why are you concerned about what she says, anyway?
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She claims that a camisole with lace on the edge looks like lingerie and thusly, am being provocative. As for the bolero, the short ones that cover only a woman’s breasts are provocative because it causes a man to notice a woman’s chest. Also anything that goes across the chest. She also told me that when a skirt goes up, even by accident (i.e. windy day) is immodest, especially because I wear shorts underneath, and shorts are only for men. But I am clumsy, I feel better wearing shorts just in case I trip, there is no way anyone can say they saw anything.

Thanks everyone! You made me feel much better! I know that I try to be modest as I can, and I know that sometimes I may have slip ups, but I do try my best. My sounding board is my 88 year old grandmother to see if she thinks that something is immodest. In fact, sometimes she tells me I dress too matronly.
 
The male and female bodies were designed to be beautiful, they were meant to be admired, God designed them this way for a reason…it is the enemy that tries to convince them its somehow dirty/ nasty, or needs to be covered up, shunned. That is basically blaspheming one of Gods creations.
 
GF_Girl said:
She says that in the Bible it says that a woman should not dress like a man and that by wearing pants it is immodest and am provoking men. How pants (not talking about painted on jeans, but normal fitting pants) could provoke men if they are men’s garments. She says that when a woman shows her figure it provokes men and therefore immodest. She also told me that she since she cannot control her daughter, she needs to control me (her words).
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Tell her that you do not give her permission to control you. Just wear what you want and her comments should go into one ear and out the other.
 
GF_Girl said:
She claims that a camisole with lace on the edge looks like lingerie and thusly, am being provocative. As for the bolero, the short ones that cover only a woman’s breasts are provocative because it causes a man to notice a woman’s chest. Also anything that goes across the chest. She also told me that when a skirt goes up, even by accident (i.e. windy day) is immodest, especially because I wear shorts underneath, and shorts are only for men. But I am clumsy, I feel better wearing shorts just in case I trip, there is no way anyone can say they saw anything.

Thanks everyone! You made me feel much better! I know that I try to be modest as I can, and I know that sometimes I may have slip ups, but I do try my best. My sounding board is my 88 year old grandmother to see if she thinks that something is immodest. In fact, sometimes she tells me I dress too matronly.
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I would say listen to your grandmother, then. You have no reason to listen to your aunt on this issue.

I’ll tell you what: it would be more immodest NOT to wear shorts underneath a knee-length skirt. That’s what they made my sister do when she went to the Catholic all-girls’ school!

My take on it, as a man, is that the only thing that’s definitely immodest is a bare butt or bare breasts. That just screams “look at me! worship me! I have boobs and a butt!” That’s not only rude and narcissistic, it’s just stupid. :mad:

But as long as you don’t do that, as far as I can see, it’s a matter of taste - as long as it’s not used with the intention 😉 of cheaply distracting or attracting men by baring 😉 curves, you should have no qualms whatsoever. 😃

If you just intend to look good in general, or intend to get something that you think looks tasteful or just nice, go for it, and let your aunt stew in whatever’s turning her sour. Don’t worry about it.
 
GF_Girl said:
She says that in the Bible it says that a woman should not dress like a man and that by wearing pants it is immodest and am provoking men. How pants (not talking about painted on jeans, but normal fitting pants) could provoke men if they are men’s garments. She says that when a woman shows her figure it provokes men and therefore immodest. She also told me that she since she cannot control her daughter, she needs to control me (her words).
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Does your aunt’s house have a parapet?
For the bible says
"When you build a new house, put a parapet around the roof; otherwise, if someone falls off, you will bring bloodguilt upon your house.
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Does she wear a cloak like this?
"You shall put twisted cords on the four corners of the cloak that you wrap around you.
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Understand I am being a bit sarcastic. Let me address the one on not dressing like a man. It is this verse that it is known that men and women had differences in their clothing. At this time, they basically had the same clothing. Also consider that men did not wear pants. Pants are not exclusive to a male. It really isn’t about clothing but what we would call cross dressing now. In other words, the prohibition was denying the sex that you were born to. Sounds familiar? The more things change the more they stay the same.
 
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