To clarify, I didn’t stay for the whole mass because I had to be at my regular one at 10am. And I HAD to be there because I’m in RCIA and I’m getting baptized on Saturday and our RCIA class meets during the 10am mass.
Someone mentioned something about my religion status saying “unsure”. I don’t know if it was intended but those comments came off very negatively. I didn’t think that it was necesary to explain that when I joined this forum I was in fact unsure about my religion, and that now I’m formally converting to Catholicism and that I simply haven’t bothered to update my profile because I didn’t think of it.
I am a woman. (Someone refered to me as “he” or “him”)
Someone mentioned going somewhere and getting what you expect, but like i said, I expected to like it, I mean really I thought I would love it, and I simply didn’t. Someone else said maybe it had something to do with the fact that I didn’t know anyone there, but I’ve visited many Catholic churches where I don’t know anyone and I haven’t experienced that emptiness.
Perhaps “empty” isn’t a good work to describe it, but I don’t know of a better one. My fiance put it this way: it felt like everyone there was “playing” church, and not actually at church. Really, it had more of a fundamentalist protestant feel to me than anything else. Maybe it was the architecture - I frankly don’t know. I was just curious if anyone had experienced anything similar.
Thank you for sharing these things with us. It is possible to share one’s stories of ‘particular feelings’, but not to explain them, because in a sense the feeling comes before the explanation: whatever is said about it, the feeling is still there.
Over the years I have attended SSPX, “freelance” TLM (Traditional Latin Mass), “Indult” TLM (with bishop’s permission), ‘reverent’ Novus Ordo and decidedly ‘irreverent’ Novus Ordo. I have found a very wide range of reactions to all these things from different people. What I have just called a “decidedly ‘irreverent’ Novus Ordo” was clearly being well appreciated by some of those there. For others, pain and embarrassment were quite obvious.
As for the SSPX Masses: There is a complete spectrum. I know personally of some people who go to just one SSPX Mass and afterwards never willingly go anywhere else. Apart from the SSPX itself, there are now numerous Religious congregations who accept SPX priests & bishops. One hears of a young person who was overwhelmed after his first Mass, considered a Vocation for the first time that very day, and had entered such a community within 18 months of his first SSPX Mass, leaving a promising Worldly Career. On the other end, I know of a man who was very committed to the TLM. When he persuaded his wife to go, she replied, “it’s like the Mass with everything left out”.
At our SSPX Mass Centre (a converted Anglican Church) I have seen newcomers come in, hang around at the very back, and then leave during the Offertory (when there is a chance to slip out). Nobody knows their intentions, but I would always wish they would at least stay through one whole Mass. When somebody suggests to me that they might come, I usually say, “Go for at least three Masses.”
Back to one’s feelings. Most Catholics who are not used to the SSPX set-up would go there with some hesitation. It does go very much against the grain to put yourself out on a limb like that. In fact, I never pressurise people to go. I have said (on occasion), “It is no small matter to ignore the known requests of the bishop and the Pope. But if you can see the reasons, it is a legitimate response to the Crisis in the Church.”
That mysterious experience called ‘falling in love’ or even ‘infatuation’ can be discussed. Partly the Smitten One is seeing who is really there; partly they are seeing only the reflection of their own love. As the song has it: “Who can explain it? Who can tell you why? Fools give you reasons; wise men never try”. When we attend a ‘different’ religious ceremony, I suppose most of us are on our guard. We need to beware of feelings of disinclination: they might be only a reflection of our own feelings, rather than something that truly comes from the outside.
Peter walked on the water. So long as he was looking at Christ, he walked in safety. But the moment he started looking around him, he sank. I advise people to concentrate on why we go to Mass: it is to be – literally – at Calvary. Our Lord on the Cross can actually see us, and He is consoled. This gift is not given to all, but only to Catholics. It is The Pearl of Great Price. Do not be too put off by the other parishoners; they will be a mixed bunch, and not all of them will be “our type”. In fact, I do rather like the fact that a huge effort is not made where we are to “love-bomb” prospective new members; I am suspicious of ulterior motives if I think that is being tried on me.
Welcome Home to the Catholic Church, D0UBTFIRE. Hilaire Belloc speaks movingly of how She is the natural home and hearth of humanity: “Outside it is night”. I hope you will come to the TLM, and also to try the SSPX again on a day when you are not under pressure, and there is just a “normal” Mass. And: don’t be put off by negative comments of other ‘non-trad’ Catholics. There has been a huge amount of misrepresentation of the Trad. position in general, and of the SSPX, and such people are usually only repeating the distortions they have been fed. I hope you will talk to the SSPX priest there. And I really will have to warn you against “the over-zealous layman” who often hangs around after Mass, buttonholing people with his own version of things. GKChesterton, writing in the 1930s, long before Vatican II or anything else, found such people a barrier to the progress of converts like himself.
Go n-éirí an bóthar leat! Good luck on the road!