Wearing chapel veils

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The friend told my friend’s husband that he is surprised the husband lets his wife
wear a white veil as it signifies she is single.
 
7_Sorrows said:
The friend told my friend’s husband that he is surprised the husband lets his wife
wear a white veil as it signifies she is single.
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There is so much wrong with this statement that I can’t even.

Since when does a husband “let” his wife or “not let” his wife wear something? She is an adult, not his teenage daughter. Who would want “friends” who have such attitudes towards women in the 21st century, unless perhaps the “friend” is 95 years old and “from the old country”?

Also, on what planet is veil color symbolism in the Catholic Church universal, when most women aren’t wearing any sort of head covering at all because it hasn’t been required for longer than I’ve been alive - and when it was required, a lot of women were wearing hats, not veils, to meet the requirement, and there was no color or style restriction on hats?
 
I’m very sorry. May God grant her blessed repose and eternal memory

vicnaja jeh pamjat
vicnaja jeh pamjat
Blazennyj pokoj; vicnaja jeh pamjat
 
Praying today for the repose of your mother’s soul. May the Lord grant comfort to you and all who grieve for her. God bless :pray:t3:
 
I am so sorry for your loss. Prayers for both her and you and your family.
 
I think something went wrong with your quoting. My mother is very much alive.
 
Well, my friend was taken aback. I don’t believe the priest was a fan of veiling as he would not allow anyone to veil who was serving as a Eucharistic minister either.
As a side note. sadly, this priest by choice has left the priesthood. I am not sure if it
is permanent or temporary while he is discerning his future.
So please say a prayer for him.
 
I’m sorry to hear that the priest left. I will say some special prayers for him for sure.

I think priests sometimes have concerns over women in the public ministries wearing head coverings (Unless of course they’re religious sisters wearing a veil as part of their habit), because it causes the woman to stand out and can raise questions in the minds of others watching. I’ve never seen a priest object to anyone who was simply wearing their veil in the pew or at Adoration.

I happened to be at a Mass last night when the gifts were taken up by a father and his three children. It wasn’t a traditional church but a few women choose to cover their heads, which is perfectly fine. Two of the children taking up the gifts were little girls and one was wearing a white veil and the other, who was maybe 3 years older but appeared to be age 12 or younger, was wearing some kind of dark blue headscarf. So even the more traditional folks don’t all agree on these color codes for head coverings, apparently.
 
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When I was attending Church as a kid in the 1950s and early 60s, many women still wore mantillas (the Spanish word for them, as this was southern California) and the shorter versions, called chapel caps. Almost all of them were either white or black, and I never was told of any distinctions regarding marital status – I just thought it was a matter of choice.

Occasionally, I would see one of those in a different color – pastel blue, pink, yellow, even light green. I never knew if there was any significance as to a reason why – again, I thought it was a matter of choice, like maybe those colors went with the rest of the wardrobe they were wearing that day, i.e., part of a fashion statement.

In those more traditional days, women were expected to cover their heads, while men were required to remove their hats. I would see all kinds and sorts of female head coverings, especially at Easter. Huge, broad-brimmed hats with artificial flowers on them, ribbons and bows, etc. It was part of dressing up for Church.

I still, very rarely, see lacy head coverings today – mantillas, chapel caps or scarves, and I rarely see hats in general. Women have gotten away from wearing head coverings in church, although men still, for the most part, remove their hats.
 
JanR said:
Almost all of them were either white or black, and I never was told of any distinctions regarding marital status – I just thought it was a matter of choice.

Occasionally, I would see one of those in a different color – pastel blue, pink, yellow, even light green. I never knew if there was any significance as to a reason why – again, I thought it was a matter of choice, like maybe those colors went with the rest of the wardrobe they were wearing that day, i.e., part of a fashion statement
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I kind of think the whole “black=married woman; white=unmarried” is mostly a myth. I am sure I have mentioned this on another of our many veiling threads, but a quick Google search will turn up photos of Jackie Kennedy in both both white and black/dark mantillas, so I rather doubt it was a hard-and-fast rule anywhere. Plus, as you mentioned, mantillas were made in colors other than black and white both then and now. I am not a fan of the idea of using one’s chapel veil or mantilla to signal availability or lack thereof, so I am glad that this is no longer a thing, to the extent it ever was. 🙂
 
Interesting article regarding the color of veils - Veiling at Mass: What are the rules?

Some extracts:-
" The more popular opinion is that white is for unmarried women and black is for married, as you stated, but even that’s not a rule, per se(eta meaning by or in itself) . My grandmother used to say that wearing a white veil helped the fellas spot the eligible women and the black veils warded off unwelcome flirtation."

“Different cultures have their own traditions about colors.”

" Here’s a fun fact: women wear black when having an audience with the pope – married or not. Only on rare occasions can a woman wear white when meeting privately with the pontiff. Called le privilége du blanc in French or il privilegio del bianco in Italian, the special tradition is extended solely to designated Catholic queens and princesses and is usually reserved for important events at the Vatican, such as private audiences, canonizations, beatifications and special Masses."

"In other words, even when veiling was more of the norm, the “rules” still varied by a bit by location and situation. Traditionally, the colors were white for single women and black for married one, but now there is no real hard and fast rule. "
 
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