Wedding attendance

[Leon_Bloy]

My point was is it sinful for me to attend a wedding that is not in a Catholic church and between 2 Catholics in good standing? I am attending a wedding today that I couldn’t tell you what faith they follow, am I sin by going without talking to my priest?

I was in 2 weddings as a best man and groomsmen one wedding was in a protestant church and the other outside in a unitarian type of faith. Did I sin by not giving my priest a call and asking?

Valid, I understand what a Valid Catholic wedding is.

The problem is that if you knowingly participate in or attend a wedding (which makes you a “witness” of it) of one or two Catholics who are marrying outside the C/church without permission, it would seem that you are implicitly condoning or even participating in the serious sin that they are committing by doing this.

 

[michaelmas]

The problem is that if you knowingly participate in or attend a wedding (which makes you a “witness” of it) of one or two Catholics who are marrying outside the C/church without permission, it would seem that you are implicitly condoning or even participating in the serious sin that they are committing by doing this.

I will talk to the Priest about it…

None of the weddings I mentioned were Catholic but I was a part of it. If I am reading everyone excellent posts I did something against church teaching.

 

[Leon_Bloy]

I will talk to the Priest about it…

None of the weddings I mentioned were Catholic but I was a part of it. If I am reading everyone excellent posts I did something against church teaching.

I was assuming that you were talking about Catholic weddings… but yes, talk to your priest - good idea. And it’s great that you care about it - many people don’t!

 

[GwenL]

Are we allowed to attend a wedding for a couple who are cohabiting? It’s also a beach wedding ceremony. Are we as Catholics sining or being an accomplice to their sin if we attend the wedding?

Spencer2, there are so many variables about which we know nothing. You need to take your individual situation to your priest and seek his guidance. So much depends on whether they are close family (your children? your brother/sister?), and whether they are Catholic, and what is your expected role in the wedding.

 

[ConstantineTG]

Are we allowed to attend a wedding for a couple who are cohabiting? It’s also a beach wedding ceremony. Are we as Catholics sining or being an accomplice to their sin if we attend the wedding?

How do you think you are being an accomplice to their sin? They are getting married, isn’t that a good thing? Also, if they are not Catholics, what is wrong for them to get married in a non-Catholic ceremony?

 

[Mountain_Man]

This is a fascinating topic. I’ve been to three non-Catholic weddings of relatives who were raised Catholic (two of them were beach weddings with rather dubious “ministers” presiding over them). It never occured to me that attending such weddings could be sinful, though I had myself drifted away from the faith during those years.

Is this something that should be brought up in confession? I don’t think my attendance amounts to mortal sin since I never realized it could be a sin.

 

[ConstantineTG]

This is a fascinating topic. I’ve been to three non-Catholic weddings of relatives who were raised Catholic (two of them were beach weddings with rather dubious “ministers” presiding over them). It never occured to me that attending such weddings could be sinful, though I had myself drifted away from the faith during those years.

Is this something that should be brought up in confession? I don’t think my attendance amounts to mortal sin since I never realized it could be a sin.

My biggest question in such situation is, how does one’s skipping the event change anything? Are they all going to go, “ooohhh, X isn’t here. Maybe we should convert to Catholicism and get married in a Catholic Church.” If at that, if they knew you skipped their wedding because of your faith, they more they will abhor the Catholic Church. Of course I do realize that there are legitimate reasons to skip a wedding (same-sex marriage), but there must be enough common sense and charity in such situations.

 

[garn9173]

This is a fascinating topic. I’ve been to three non-Catholic weddings of relatives who were raised Catholic (two of them were beach weddings with rather dubious “ministers” presiding over them). It never occured to me that attending such weddings could be sinful, though I had myself drifted away from the faith during those years.

It would be rude and inconsiderate not to attend regardless of one’s standing in the Church.

 

[Leon_Bloy]

It would be rude and inconsiderate not to attend regardless of one’s standing in the Church.

With respect, rudeness and inconsiderateness are not that relevant when it comes to matters of sin…

Some people would consider it “rude” to insist that, for example, a Catholic cousin who is visiting you from out of town in the company of a girlfriend or boyfriend sleep in separate rooms in your house.

 

[Deo_Gratias42]

Oh please. So many people on here will tell you that you can’t attend an invalid wedding, but please talk to your priest. My fiance was baptized and raised catholic but is an atheist and we are having a secular wedding. Several of his family members were concerned and spoke to their priests, and all 3 priests said that it was best to go.

Heck, one of them even got permission to be a groomsman!

They tolerate close family members in order to “keep peace in the family” in certain circumstances, but generally speaking, if you know it is an invalid marriage, you’re not supposed to attend. I had to go through this with my brother’s invalid beach wedding, which was pretty dumb. She wasn’t baptized, so all they needed was a disparity of cult. Now they’re expecting, stuck in another country, wanting to baptize their baby, but aren’t validly married.

 

[clem456]

As other posters have said, so many variables. The Church makes no blanket statements either way for you particular situation. That’s life, eh?

The biggest consideration in my mind when these situations come up is, how will my actions bring people closer to Christ?

How well do you know the couple.Are you going to the wedding just to get sloshed on the beach with co-workers? Or is this your daughter’s wedding? Makes a difference.

Will your absence give evidence of your capitulation in your Catholic faith? Sometimes it is rubbed in one’s face that because you are Catholic, you should set your faith aside and come down to the beach for our wedding. I wouldn’t go.

More commonly, will your absence cause a lifetime of hurt and anger in a family? (this happens aaaalllll the time) If this is the case you should go in my opinion, and bring your faith with you, before the wedding, during, and after. We can gently let people know where we stand without taking our ball and going home. You will not lead anyone to the Church if you obstinately cling to the letter of the law while ignoring the substance of it.

Again, how will your actions bring the couple closer to Christ? It is possible to be a witness amid difficult circumstances.

 

[jupiter1]

Canon laws 1124 and 1125 state the dispensation process for marrying outside the catholic church. “The Church does not explicitly forbid Catholics from attending presumptively-invalid marriages.” --Michelle Arnold, Catholic Answers Apologist (2007). She further states that even if there may be just reason to attend these types of marriages, she does not recommend being a participant. She goes on to say that she does not recommend attending same-sex marriages due to the Churches strong stance against same-sex marriage. With attending presumptively-invalid marriages, she suggests taking it on a case to case basis. With all this said, maybe we are talking only about the select few cases out there that are blatant.

 

[fastenatingguy]

I suppose He’d give them an opportunity to repent of their sins, and if they did, He’d advise them to sin no more.

That’s pretty much what He always did. You can read all about it in the Gospels.

perfect response