Wedding Budget!

[BlueEyedLady]

We finally have our wedding date set, we have a general idea of what we want, and we have the location narrowed down to three places.

What I’m asking for are your favorite tips, tricks, and creative ideas for getting married on the cheap. For food I’m already contacting local culinary schools to see if any students would be willing to help out for less money than caterers. I am seeking out amateur DJs and all of the dresses I have found are under $150. (Yes, I’m amazing. One of my favorites is actually only $45.)

Thoughts on flowers, decorations, other food ideas, alcohol, cake, etc? Anything to help me have a nice but cheap wedding is appreciated.

 

[Della]

Flowers and decorations would be dependent on the venue in which you are having your wedding. Are you considering a country club or a private home or outdoor wedding? If outdoors, a wedding on the beach would require very little or in a garden–there the decor is built in. Also, do you have a friend who is license to perform weddings? S/he might do it free or for a small stipend.

 

[Em_in_FL]

One trick we used was to have a VERY SMALL wedding cake, and have simple sheet cakes in the back for all the guests. Everyone got to enjoy a piece of cake, but we didn’t have to pay the exorbitant cost of having a LARGE one decorated.

 

[Em_in_FL]

Flowers and decorations would be dependent on the venue in which you are having your wedding. Are you considering a country club or a private home or outdoor wedding? If outdoors, a wedding on the beach would require very little or in a garden–there the decor is built in.

Catholic wedding ceremonies need to be INSIDE a church, though…
Receptions are a different story…

But, to save on flower costs we chose to have our wedding around Christmas… so the church was already beautifully decorated. We didn’t pay for ANY flowers at the church and MADE all our table decorations (simple candles decorated with ribbons)…

 

[shainski]

First of all - congratulations and good luck.

You seem like a wise woman - and so, you will probably be okay.

First of all - your guest list is likely to grow as you get closer. And that is likely to be the biggest place where you need to be careful. Decide ahead of time - what you are willing to accommodate. If parents or others press you to add additional people, tell them what the cost per person will be to you.

Secondly, every thing you do can add lots of extra costs. So decide ahead of time what is important to you. The cake?, the dress?, the music?, the pictures?, the guest list? If you splurge on something - make sure it is something that is important to you. For us, it was important to us to have whole families there. We had lots of kids at our wedding - and we wanted that. We cut back on other things to make that accommodation.

Everything can be a bottomless pit. I once knew someone who offered to pick up the cost of the flowers for a couple. She thought when she offered that the tab would be $400-$500. She was completely unprepared for the (if i remember correctly), $5,000 tab. (And this was years ago, it would probably be double that in today’s dollars).

I would stay away from an open bar - (but, i realize in different parts of the country, the expectations are different). I think, we did offer beer at ours, and we had a half-barrel - and the establishment was to get the approval of the bride or groom (only) before they were to tap a second one. We didn’t have to, but we just didn’t want a problem with not only the cost, but intoxicated guests. Actually, i think that even soda cost us $1.50 a glass (or something like that).

we kept an excel spreadsheet of every expense. What we expected - what we had to pay out in deposits, and when it was due. That kept us on track with what we could afford - and allowed us to see everything before us and allowed us to prioritize.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Catholic wedding ceremonies need to be INSIDE a church, though…
Receptions are a different story…

But, to save on flower costs we chose to have our wedding around Christmas… so the church was already beautifully decorated. We didn’t pay for ANY flowers at the church and MADE all our table decorations (simple candles decorated with ribbons)…

The OP isn’t a Catholic, and while her future husband IS, he isn’t practicing his faith and refuses to be married in a church. We’ve already been through this with her, there are many of us still praying for her and her husband to be…

 

[hannajomar]

• Do you know someone who could do your hair and make-up for you? My aunt did my make-up beautifully. I got my hair done very cheaply at a chain hair salon. $70 I think for me, $50 for my bridesmaids.
• You can save a lot of money on invitations by just having simple invitations. Do your research. Sometimes, you can find them cheaper at a printing place than actually doing them yourself.
• For flowers, I told the the florist what colors I wanted, and she used local, in-season flowers to match that. No one is going to take much notice if it’s yellow daisies or a yellow flowers that was shipped in from Holland.
• We didn’t rent limos. Most of the wedding party had spouses/dates/kids who they wanted to travel with. So my friend who has a red convertible drove my husband and me around for free!
• One huge expense is a photographer. If I could have done that more simply and cheaply, I would have.

Congrats on your engagement!

 

[BlueEyedLady]

I like the small wedding cake idea. We’ve been talking about doing the same thing only with one small cake and a bunch of cupcakes instead of sheet cake. But sheet cake may be cheaper. I have a very skilled photographer friend who is giving me a great deal. And all but one of my bridal attendants are male, and although I didn’t choose them that way to save money it will certainly cut back on hair and makeup expenses.

It is kind of expected that we have an open bar. What I hope to do is have wine and beer available, and if possible bottom shelf only cocktails.

As for flowers I just need a bouquet for me, a small version to throw, a flower for my bridesmaid and little flower things to pin to the bridal attendants and groomsmen. I really don’t like flower decorations.

 

[Samuel63]

I would skip the DJ. Have some friends get together for an evening months before. Make a list together of the favorite music of your earlier and later years. Go to the library then and check out the cd’s and make a play list. Set this up on an amplifier and speakers (rented) and let it play for the 4-hour period.

The most important point though, is to make the marriage valid from the perspective of the one true church.

 

[jilly4ski]

I like the small wedding cake idea. We’ve been talking about doing the same thing only with one small cake and a bunch of cupcakes instead of sheet cake. But sheet cake may be cheaper. I have a very skilled photographer friend who is giving me a great deal. And all but one of my bridal attendants are male, and although I didn’t choose them that way to save money it will certainly cut back on hair and makeup expenses.

It is kind of expected that we have an open bar. What I hope to do is have wine and beer available, and if possible bottom shelf only cocktails.

As for flowers I just need a bouquet for me, a small version to throw, a flower for my bridesmaid and little flower things to pin to the bridal attendants and groomsmen. I really don’t like flower decorations.

I actually made the bouquets and boutonnieres from silk(?) flowers I purchased at Joanne’s or Micheals. The only real flowers we had were mine. Nobody’s flowers wilted and got brown, or lost flower heads, etc. I was astonished at what they charge for a small bridal bouquet. So the $50-$75 I spent buying supplies and flowers wasn’t really that much in comparison.

As far as alcohol, we had free beer (in the keg) but made people buy their mixed drinks (soda was free). We also did what Em did with the cake. We got a relatively small cake (but still pretty) and then just a sheet for most of the guests. Something to be aware of is that special cake places often charge huge amounts for cake because it is a wedding cake. We discovered that our local grocery store sheet cakes are just as delicious, with the same flavors and cheaper than what we paid for a cake of the same size for our wedding. If I had known that, I would have potentially gone that route. But the cake really wasn’t that important to me.

Shop around for your venue (if you are going the more traditional route), we discovered that even places relatively close together have wildly different prices. The hotel we tried was the worst. The local golf club was bad for what you got, but the local banquet hall was very nice with lots of “freebees” tossed in. (The simple center pieces and simple linens were included in the price, which was cheaper than everywhere else who didn’t include them). Make sure you look at all their prices (including alcohol, decorations, cake cutting, etc.) not just their price per plate.

 

[shainski]

Something to be aware of is that special cake places often charge huge amounts for cake because it is a wedding cake. We discovered that our local grocery store sheet cakes are just as delicious, with the same flavors and cheaper than what we paid for a cake of the same size for our wedding. If I had known that, I would have potentially gone that route. But the cake really wasn’t that important to me.

Oh yeah, i forgot about that. My wife went to a few cake testings. And the local grocery chain actually came out on top. And we found out that their “birthday cakes” were the exact same cakes as the “wedding cakes” except, I think they wedding cakes were slightly taller. (and twice as expensive)

 

[Allegra]

I would skip the DJ. Have some friends get together for an evening months before. Make a list together of the favorite music of your earlier and later years. Go to the library then and check out the cd’s and make a play list. Set this up on an amplifier and speakers (rented) and let it play for the 4-hour period.

The most important point though, is to make the marriage valid from the perspective of the one true church.

This advice requires breaking copyright law. Besides that, a good DJ does more than just plays songs. If you are going to have just a dinner, then you don’t need a DJ and can just run a playlist, but if you are planning on having a dance, this is a terrible idea. I found that we saved alot of money and time by having the reception at a hotel with a good restaurant. The place was lovely. The tables were set with ironed table linen and china, which the hotel had ready for us and cleaned after it was over. The only thing we had to pay for was the food and bar tab. If we’d tried to host it somewhere else, we’d have had to rent tables, chairs, and table clothes (which then must be ironed), buy paper plates and plasticware or rent the real thing, pay the astronomical price of the food from a caterer in addition to the cost of the servers, etc. If you have it at a hotel, you don’t generally pay for any of that.

 

[ABEACHGIRL]

I would not skimp on a photographer or videographer. I know of several people who did and got what they paid for! I also know people who skipped the video altogether and later regretted not having a professional. Uncle Bob may claim to be just as good, but probably is not. I would never let my daughters take that risk.

You do not have to have free alcohol at your wedding. I had a few mixed drinks at the happy hour and then a cash bar after. I think people abuse open bars both in the amount they drink and in keeping track of their drinks. However, I know many people find cash bars tacky.

I did not do big floral arrangements at the reception. I am sure some people thought it was cheesy, but I liked the small arrangements. I find them intrusive. Many people do not even use floral arrangements on the tables and put pretty items in the center instead. Candles are very inexpensive and some candleholders are cheap but elegant. Also, you do not need a lot of paper items on the table. Sometimes there is so much one cannot find a place to put a glass! Less is more. For the flowers for the bride and bridesmaids, I would get whatever you like. Going cheap is something you may regret if you really love flowers or have your heart set on something but forgo it due to price.

Basically, you should spend on what is important to you and you future spouse. I like bands and my sister likes DJs. We each got we wanted for our own weddings and both were fun. Try not to let others influence you, telling you what you “have” to do or have. You do not need to impress anyone.

 

[Deo_Gratias42]

Catholic wedding ceremonies need to be INSIDE a church, though…
Receptions are a different story…

But, to save on flower costs we chose to have our wedding around Christmas… so the church was already beautifully decorated.

This is smart. Should I get married, I’m hoping sometime shortly after Easter while the church is still decorated. Flowers eat up a budget fast.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I would skip the DJ. Have some friends get together for an evening months before. Make a list together of the favorite music of your earlier and later years. Go to the library then and check out the cd’s and make a play list. Set this up on an amplifier and speakers (rented) and let it play for the 4-hour period.

The most important point though, is to make the marriage valid from the perspective of the one true church.

Very true, but the OP and her husband to be are atheists, although he is a baptized Catholic. That’s another thread, though.

 

[1ke]

We finally have our wedding date set, we have a general idea of what we want, and we have the location narrowed down to three places.

What I’m asking for are your favorite tips, tricks, and creative ideas for getting married on the cheap.

I really found the Bridal Bargains book to be very useful. And, I got my copy at Half Priced Books used.

Thoughts on flowers, decorations, other food ideas, alcohol, cake, etc? Anything to help me have a nice but cheap wedding is appreciated.

I had a florist make bouquet/bouts, etc, but for the tables at the reception I ordered bulk Gerbera daisies from an online company and floated 3 in a bowl (the recpetion place had the bowls so I didn’t have that expense) and put tea lights and rose petals on the tables (rose petals also can be ordered online in bulk). Doing the 3 in a bowl made the flowers go a LONG way.

I used www.papermart.com for ribbon
I used www.specialtybottle.com for some small tins in which I put custom M&Ms (might be out of your budget but just giving you some ideas)
I used www.planetlabel.com to get odd sized labels (round) to fit my M&M tins

I made my own wedding invitations. At the time, you could order paper directly from the papermills but I don’t think you can any more. There are some bulk paper places online.

I could go on all day. Don’t get me talking about wedding crafts.

 

[1ke]

I like the small wedding cake idea. We’ve been talking about doing the same thing only with one small cake and a bunch of cupcakes instead of sheet cake. But sheet cake may be cheaper…

Don’t overlook Sam’s Club, Costco, and the grocery store bakery because they make awesome wedding cakes. Also, Sam’s club also has online bulk flower ordering.

 

[chipeto]

Don’t overlook Sam’s Club, Costco, and the grocery store bakery because they make awesome wedding cakes. Also, Sam’s club also has online bulk flower ordering.

When I was engaged, we were planning to get our flowers from Costco. I don’t remember the specifics, but it was a good deal.

 

[Irishmom2]

Don’t overlook Sam’s Club, Costco, and the grocery store bakery because they make awesome wedding cakes. Also, Sam’s club also has online bulk flower ordering.

There was another thread about weddings and someone said that you should never tell them it is a wedding cake. It will immediately cost more for the same cake… Just say it is for a family gathering.

 

[maltmom]

Neither my ex-husband nor I were Catholic when we got married 4 years ago. I venue we picked was rather rustic. Instead of flowers a friend loaned me two large, beautiful ferns. We had soda, a keg of beer and Peach Verdi Asti Spumante ($6 per bottle). We didn’t get table cloths. Our table decorations were small bowls from Dollar Tree with some glass beads, water and a candle. Beautiful and cheap.

Best wishes. I’m so happy you guys have set the date.