Wedding Music

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Many_Blessings said:
Well, I’d rather be on the side where I’m not played for a fool and made a chump of? Which side is that?
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Neither. See Mark Thompson’s post above.

Sounds like you’re throwing a bit of a tantrum because Mary’s dad let her see an R-rated movie and your dad didn’t.
 
Many_Blessings said:
Well, I’d rather be on the side where I’m not played for a fool and made a chump of? Which side is that?
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That would be the side of your church who told you what was and was not appropriate. The person’s recent wedding is actually the one who was made to look like a fool as well as the music director who permitted it. To me, as a church musician as well as a secular musician, I know what the rules are and would have thought that this music director or whoever it was didn’t know much about what is and is not liturgically correct and appropriate. He/She might have looked like a fool to me. That said, I know that it is sometimes not the fault of the musicians or music directors. Even if they know what is appropriate, they sometimes have to do what the pastor tells them to do. That music might have been allowed, but was inappropriate because the music had overtly secular connotations. Mark Thompson was also correct. What is called “absolute” music is music that has no sacred connotation, but also no overtly secular connotation. ie. was not a secular song with words, nor were instrumental music from operas, musical theater, theater, etc. Now, some parishes might be even more restrictive with absolute music, but most are not. Some dioceses or individual parishes are more permissive, but it doesn’t make them in the right. It just makes them look more wishy-washy.
 
Vaughan Williams’ arrangement of “All People That On Earth Do Dwell” would make for an outstanding processional, with “Come Down O Love Divine” being quite suitable for Communion!
 
If you’re having a presentation to the Blessed Mother and - like me - you will tear your ears off if you hear the Schubert Ave Maria one more time, consider this alternative, written in 1964.

youtube.com/watch?v=gKk_HaDMBDY

The whole piece is wonderful, but since it’s set as a whole Angelus, it’s a little long. You can sing just the last three minutes as a stand-alone Ave Maria (start the video at 3:30).
 
aemcpa said:
Sounds like you’re throwing a bit of a tantrum because Mary’s dad let her see an R-rated movie and your dad didn’t.
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For the record, I did not intend my remarks to sound snide nor to imply that the poster is throwing a tantrum. Rather, my point was that what her priest did was both right and good for her, and the fact that other people’s priests do not do the same should, if anything, only make her feel more proud of her own priest.
 
Thank you for your replies…and I’m hoping Sarabande finds a list she can send me (if you find the list, I’ll PM you my email address if that easier than posting it here).

I have played for protestant weddings in the past and secular civil weddings, and want to of course do all things music related correctly in the Catholic Church. One thing I have not liked about civil weddings (and non-Catholic weddings) is the choice of music…I’m very traditional, even old-fashioned where that is concerned. The worst I EVER heard was once at a Baptist wedding they played a recording of the song, “Tonight I celebrate my love for you.” and in the lyrics are the words “tonight there’ll be no distance between us.” Personally, I was embarrassed for anyone who would have allowed that song to be played in a house or worship, and even more embarrassed for them if they weren’t knowledgeable or traditional enough to even know that song was offensive and just AWFUL!

So, I’ll start working on a list here and anyone can slap me down hopefully if I pick something awful…PLEASE let me know if any of these are improper, as I start working on a list…

PROCESSIONAL
Ode to Joy
Canon in D

GIFTS
Where there is Love

COMMUNION

RECESSIONAL

Oy vey, I’m definitely leaving something out. I’ll work on this more when I have my binders, lists in here.

Thank you for all your responses, it is giving me lots to think about, but I’m also really hoping for good suggestions (and discussion) about individual songs. Of course I’ll run anything by the Music Director and/or Pastor as the case may be.
 
Hi Elizabeth. I just pm’ed you with a couple of lists. Hope they help.
 
Sarabande said:
👍

Elizabeth - That’s the one also entitled “The Heavens Declare” on the list I sent to you. It’s a beautiful piece live.
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At the last wedding I played for (and the first… the parish was generally too old for weddings, but had LOTS of funerals!) the bride chose that for the postlude. I was glad she did because it’s one of my favorites.
 
The_Curt_Jester said:
At the last wedding I played for (and the first… the parish was generally too old for weddings, but had LOTS of funerals!) the bride chose that for the postlude. I was glad she did because it’s one of my favorites.
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Yes! And it’s not something done that often, which is a shame because it really is beautiful.
 
Would a secular power ballad be inappropriate for a Catholic wedding? How about for a reception following a Catholic wedding?
 
Maxirad said:
Would a secular power ballad be inappropriate for a Catholic wedding? How about for a reception following a Catholic wedding?
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For this first question: Yes, it would be inappropriate.

For your second question: It would be fine for the reception.
 
Are there any psalms similar to what Kate Middleton used for her processional (Parry’s “I was Glad”) that would make a wonderful processional?
 
Sarabande said:
For this first question: Yes, it would be inappropriate.

For your second question: It would be fine for the reception.
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If I ever get married, would it be appropriate for me to have heavy metal played at the reception? I certainly wouldn’t want songs with blasphemous lyrics to be played.

Also, would it be a good idea to have this song played at the reception?
 
Maxirad said:
If I ever get married, would it be appropriate for me to have heavy metal played at the reception? I certainly wouldn’t want songs with blasphemous lyrics to be played.

Also, would it be a good idea to have this song played at the reception?
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My laptop is in the shop right now, so the computer I’m using doesn’t have any sound, so I was not able to listen to it. Honestly, I have hardly ever understood a word in heavy metal music, so I truly have no idea if the lyrics are blasphemous or not. lol! 😛 I’m personally not a fan of heavy metal, so for me I wouldn’t play it at a reception or anywhere else for that matter. BUT it’s not because I think it’s blasphemous or immoral music… it’s just not my cup of tea.

It really should be at your discretion as to what you feel comfortable being played at the reception. If you think the lyrics to a song are vulgar, blasphemous or immoral and you would feel uncomfortable having it played - especially when you may have family or friends who would be offended by the music, then, to me, it wouldn’t make sense to have it played during one of your most joyous, blessed and loving events of your life, even if it isn’t done during the mass. But that’s just me.
 
GraceUnderFire said:
Are there any psalms similar to what Kate Middleton used for her processional (Parry’s “I was Glad”) that would make a wonderful processional?
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I once sang for a wedding in which the bride used Mozart’s “Laudate Dominum” from his Solemn Vespers as her processional. It is Psalm 117. I used it as a second communion piece for my wedding with soloist and choir after having an “Ave Verum Corpus” sung, but you can have it done just with a solo voice if you are unable to have a choir. I can’t think off the top of my head of other classical psalm settings. I’m sure there are settings for psalms in other styles and genres, but that’s not my area of expertise.
 
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