Wedding Question

  • Thread starter Thread starter Irishgal49
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Actually, if it was a real civil ceremony, there might be a problem. Simulating marriage is a sin. But with no marriage certificate, this isn’t a real civil ceremony; it’s just a fun activity.
You could call it a renewal of vows, presumably the couple believe they were properly married in the Catholic ceremony or they wouldn’t have bothered with it in the first place.

I’ve seen couples renew their vows in front of a priest on significant anniversaries - presumably one can do so at any time.
 
You are extremely cruel and have no idea what my sons have been through. I hope you find the same callous and cold comments when you are sincerely searching. You are certainly no Christian. Show me where Jesus said what you said.

You are pathetic. And I’m turning in your comment.
This went from some hypothetical “couple” to you and your children. Clearly this is an emotional situation for you and there was no intent on my part to be cruel to you or callous to you. This is no longer an objective discussion about a situation to which you are a bystander. This is personal to you, and I apologize and will leave this thread.
 
According to the Waaa, what babies poster, he/she should boycott all weddings that aren’t Catholic
I have never said any such thing on this forum in any thread, and I do not appreciate being talked about with untrue statements.
 
This went from some hypothetical “couple” to you and your children. Clearly this is an emotional situation for you and there was no intent on my part to be cruel to you or callous to you. This is no longer an objective discussion about a situation to which you are a bystander. This is personal to you, and I apologize and will leave this thread./QUOTE

OK so you can be rude if it’s hypothetical??? Someone help me I’m not getting this. Don’t matter, I turned you into the forum.
 
I have never said any such thing on this forum in any thread, and I do not appreciate being talked about with untrue statements.
I don’t appreciate someone insulting people they dont know. This is precisely why this forum needs to give the OP the option of deleting rude comments off their thread. Thanks for the variety, I see that I have options that can be well within the Catholic Church and will try to be honest and loving so that I can do what’s right.
 
This went from some hypothetical “couple” to you and your children. Clearly this is an emotional situation for you and there was no intent on my part to be cruel to you or callous to you. This is no longer an objective discussion about a situation to which you are a bystander. This is personal to you, and I apologize and will leave this thread.
I will say, that in looking at this person’s comments on other topics they are usually right on and very good in their direction. I especially appreciate the directives given to people suffering with OCD and/or scrupulosity, which I suffer from something horrible. Very sad and that apology was almost blaming me “well since you changed it from hypothetical to real”…well I appreciate everyone’s else’s comments. I’m going to move into reading about theology of the body if anyone knows any good threads.
 
I am not familiar with the concept of renewal of vows in a non-religious ceremony.

Some posters mentioned priests witnessing the renewal of vows, but that is not what the OP was speaking about. She mentioned a couple getting married in the Catholic church, then immediately flying to Vegas for a civil ceremony. I am also unclear as to how religious vows could be renewed just days after they were taken in the first place. If the vows were taken in a Catholic context, I don’t see how repeating them days later in a non-religious context could be a renewal, since Catholic vows are inherently religious. By omitting the religious context of the Catholic vows, there are no vows left to renew. :confused:

Renewals are usually done many years later, typically at silver and golden anniversaries.
 
Why is everyone so perplexed at the idea of not attending a marriage ceremony due to religious differences? That type of advice is dispensed on CAF all the time: if a Catholic gets married to a Protestant in a Protestant Church, we are told not to attend… if two homosexuals are getting “married” we are told not to attend, etc, etc.

All of the sudden people are accusing the children who will not go of being mean, nasty, uncaring, etc.? Um… does the same judgement apply to the good Catholics who do not attend the wedding of a Catholic to a Protestant in a Protestant Church? I bet not.
[edited]
That’s not the situation we are discussing here. Two family members who appear to have no belief in God refuse to go to their mother’s wedding. The instances you cite are dealing with someone who has left the Catholic faith or marrying outside the faith, or a “marriage” that we as Catholics don’t recognize. Our attendance would lend support for such behavior, which we must not do. Catholics certainly can and should go to weddings for friends of other religions or no religion who are getting married. Totally different situation.
 
I am not familiar with the concept of renewal of vows in a non-religious ceremony.

Some posters mentioned priests witnessing the renewal of vows, but that is not what the OP was speaking about. She mentioned a couple getting married in the Catholic church, then immediately flying to Vegas for a civil ceremony. I am also unclear as to how religious vows could be renewed just days after they were taken in the first place. If the vows were taken in a Catholic context, I don’t see how repeating them days later in a non-religious context could be a renewal, since Catholic vows are inherently religious. By omitting the religious context of the Catholic vows, there are no vows left to renew. :confused:

Renewals are usually done many years later, typically at silver and golden anniversaries.
I highly doubt there is a “time limit” on when you can renew your vows. The civil idea was before I found out you can have a renewal of vows. This would suffice and slip in some prayers and things that might touch my son’s hearts, or at least I can hope it might.
 
I highly doubt there is a “time limit” on when you can renew your vows. The civil idea was before I found out you can have a renewal of vows. This would suffice and slip in some prayers and things that might touch my son’s hearts, or at least I can hope it might.
The missal indicates that the renewal of vows is intended for the silver or golden anniversary. But again, the renewal of vows brought up in the OP was in a non-Catholic, civil ceremony. Since the vows are inherently religious, they cannot be renewed in a non-religious context, as that would be a completely different bird.
 
The missal indicates that the renewal of vows is intended for the silver or golden anniversary. But again, the renewal of vows brought up in the OP was in a non-Catholic, civil ceremony. Since the vows are inherently religious, they cannot be renewed in a non-religious context, as that would be a completely different bird.
Ok, since I am the one who originally brought up renewal of vows. :rolleyes:

Would you be happier if we said that the OP and her new husband can **repeat thier vows **at a gathering of family and friends soon after their Catholic wedding?
 
I am not familiar with the concept of renewal of vows in a non-religious ceremony.

Some posters mentioned priests witnessing the renewal of vows, but that is not what the OP was speaking about. She mentioned a couple getting married in the Catholic church, then immediately flying to Vegas for a civil ceremony. I am also unclear as to how religious vows could be renewed just days after they were taken in the first place. If the vows were taken in a Catholic context, I don’t see how repeating them days later in a non-religious context could be a renewal, since Catholic vows are inherently religious. By omitting the religious context of the Catholic vows, there are no vows left to renew. :confused:

Renewals are usually done many years later, typically at silver and golden anniversaries.
Just for clarification, my sister had a renewal of vows less than a week after her wedding. There is absolutely no time limit for such a renewal of vows. :nope: It is simply a reaffirmation by the couple of the commitment which they have made. Just because there is not usually occasion to make a public ceremony of such a reaffirmation apart from significant anniversaries does not mean it would be at all problematic to do so.
 
I highly doubt there is a “time limit” on when you can renew your vows. The civil idea was before I found out you can have a renewal of vows. This would suffice and slip in some prayers and things that might touch my son’s hearts, or at least I can hope it might.
People on the forum will have (and offer) very different views about what is and what isn’t permissible. Do you go to a priest regularly for confession or spiritual direction? If so, you should ask him about your plans. Or ask someone like your parish priest.
 
Ok, since I am the one who originally brought up renewal of vows. :rolleyes:

Would you be happier if we said that the OP and her new husband can **repeat thier vows **at a gathering of family and friends soon after their Catholic wedding?
No, because the vows are Catholic in nature. They can only be repeated in a Catholic context, which was not the case in the scenario being discussed.Otherwise they are not vows.
 
No, because the vows are Catholic in nature. They can only be repeated in a Catholic context, which was not the case in the scenario being discussed.Otherwise they are not vows.
That doesn’t make sense.

They will already have made their vows in a Catholic ceremony and will already be in a presumably valid marriage. Those are permanent. They can repeat them as many times as they want and anywhere they want. Whether it’s in the context of a Catholic Mass or on the top of Mount Kilimanjaro in front of a guru, if they speak them again they will be ‘repeating’ them. Will repeating the vows mean anything in terms of the validity or legality of their marriage? No.
 
That doesn’t make sense.

They will already have made their vows in a Catholic ceremony and will already be in a presumably valid marriage. Those are permanent. They can repeat them as many times as they want and anywhere they want. Whether it’s in the context of a Catholic Mass or on the top of Mount Kilimanjaro in front of a guru, if they speak them again they will be ‘repeating’ them. Will repeating the vows mean anything in terms of the validity or legality of their marriage? No.
My feelings too. I would think a Justice of the Peace could do a vow renewal. Once you’ve gone through the proper steps with the Church, your marriage is valid forever.
 
That doesn’t make sense.

They will already have made their vows in a Catholic ceremony and will already be in a presumably valid marriage. Those are permanent. They can repeat them as many times as they want and anywhere they want. Whether it’s in the context of a Catholic Mass or on the top of Mount Kilimanjaro in front of a guru, if they speak them again they will be ‘repeating’ them. Will repeating the vows mean anything in terms of the validity or legality of their marriage? No.
Actually, it makes perfect sense, thank you. The vows made at a Catholic marriage ceremony are completely Catholic in nature, in that they contain the Catholic understanding of sacramental marriage. They are vows that embody Our Lord’s teaching on marriage, and which Church herself has engendered. Said vows are are made in the presence of the Church’s minister. Even in the exceptional case where a dispensation from canonical form has been given, it presupposes that a priest or deacon has met with the couple and all of the other premarital preparations have made to ensure a Catholic understanding of sacramental marriage has been proffered.

The ontological reality is that Catholic vows are unique. Simply saying the words somewhere else, without any reference or connection to their Catholic basis, cannot, by definition, be considered a “renewal” because it is apart from a Catholic context. It would be like Anglican and other churches who claim to be ordaining priests. We know that they are not ordaining priests, because their orders are invalid and lacking in Catholic content, no matter how many men (and women) in mitres might be laying hands on someone. They lack an authentically Catholic understanding of the sacraments, even though they may share a good portion of those beliefs. Same with marriage vows–absent the involvement of the Catholic Church, one cannot renew something that is ontologically Catholic.
 
Actually, it makes perfect sense, thank you. The vows made at a Catholic marriage ceremony are completely Catholic in nature, in that they contain the Catholic understanding of sacramental marriage. They are vows that embody Our Lord’s teaching on marriage, and which Church herself has engendered. Said vows are are made in the presence of the Church’s minister. Even in the exceptional case where a dispensation from canonical form has been given, it presupposes that a priest or deacon has met with the couple and all of the other premarital preparations have made to ensure a Catholic understanding of sacramental marriage has been proffered.

The ontological reality is that Catholic vows are unique. Simply saying the words somewhere else, without any reference or connection to their Catholic basis, cannot, by definition, be considered a “renewal” because it is apart from a Catholic context. It would be like Anglican and other churches who claim to be ordaining priests. We know that they are not ordaining priests, because their orders are invalid and lacking in Catholic content, no matter how many men (and women) in mitres might be laying hands on someone. They lack an authentically Catholic understanding of the sacraments, even though they may share a good portion of those beliefs. Same with marriage vows–absent the involvement of the Catholic Church, one cannot renew something that is ontologically Catholic.
I might agree with you if a ‘renewal of vows’ actually DID anything. But it doesn’t, except maybe make the couple feel good.
 
Actually, it makes perfect sense, thank you. The vows made at a Catholic marriage ceremony are completely Catholic in nature, in that they contain the Catholic understanding of sacramental marriage. They are vows that embody Our Lord’s teaching on marriage, and which Church herself has engendered. Said vows are are made in the presence of the Church’s minister. Even in the exceptional case where a dispensation from canonical form has been given, it presupposes that a priest or deacon has met with the couple and all of the other premarital preparations have made to ensure a Catholic understanding of sacramental marriage has been proffered.

The ontological reality is that Catholic vows are unique. Simply saying the words somewhere else, without any reference or connection to their Catholic basis, cannot, by definition, be considered a “renewal” because it is apart from a Catholic context. It would be like Anglican and other churches who claim to be ordaining priests. We know that they are not ordaining priests, because their orders are invalid and lacking in Catholic content, no matter how many men (and women) in mitres might be laying hands on someone. They lack an authentically Catholic understanding of the sacraments, even though they may share a good portion of those beliefs. Same with marriage vows–absent the involvement of the Catholic Church, one cannot renew something that is ontologically Catholic.
I think you’re getting caught up on a technicality. It’s not a Church renewal of vows, but if they are already married with the Church, they can have a secular renewal of their love for each other without causing any issues.
 
Actually, it makes perfect sense, thank you. The vows made at a Catholic marriage ceremony are completely Catholic in nature, in that they contain the Catholic understanding of sacramental marriage. They are vows that embody Our Lord’s teaching on marriage, and which Church herself has engendered. Said vows are are made in the presence of the Church’s minister. Even in the exceptional case where a dispensation from canonical form has been given, it presupposes that a priest or deacon has met with the couple and all of the other premarital preparations have made to ensure a Catholic understanding of sacramental marriage has been proffered.

The ontological reality is that Catholic vows are unique. Simply saying the words somewhere else, without any reference or connection to their Catholic basis, cannot, by definition, be considered a “renewal” because it is apart from a Catholic context. It would be like Anglican and other churches who claim to be ordaining priests. We know that they are not ordaining priests, because their orders are invalid and lacking in Catholic content, no matter how many men (and women) in mitres might be laying hands on someone. They lack an authentically Catholic understanding of the sacraments, even though they may share a good portion of those beliefs. Same with marriage vows–absent the involvement of the Catholic Church, one cannot renew something that is ontologically Catholic.
I think you are wrong to say that they can’t expresss there love for each other unless they also bring in some element of catholic prayer, but as for the OP’s situation, I think you would do well to note this post
God bless you. I LOVE the idea of a reaffirmation because it slips Catholic prayers and such into the celebration. I try to keep planting little seeds. My one son who said there is no God actually said the other day, “I’m mad at God” --I see that as progress. These are my precious boys. They are good men. I just want them to go to heaven. I don’t want to disobey the Church but find a way to slip something in that might make them think. I’m thinking of having the wedding videotaped so I can “show” it to them.
Emphasis mine. The OP is talking about a vow renewal with some catholic elements, it will just be taking place in a secular setting. It will be far enough removed from a Catholic ceremony for her children to feel comfortable attending, but it will still have reference to the fact that the couple’s vows to each other are utlimately understood in light of the Catholic understanding of marriage. I’m really not sure why you are making such a big deal out of this. 🤷
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top